What is separation anxiety and how can it be changed?
There are a lot of reasons your dog or puppy can be anxious and very often people say “Oh that dog must have been beaten!” That’s an uncommon reason.
I had a dog, Zack, who was one step below me waiting to come in and he ducked his head and flinched as if I were going to kick him. Now THAT is a real reaction from being kicked in his face. He was a somewhat shy dog feeling comfortable with his own family and since we lived out in the boonies it wasn’t difficult to accommodate him. He did NOT have separation anxiety. I got him at 6 months old from a normally good breeder, I suspected her son was involved. Zack seemed shy but normal around my other dogs, he never bit anyone. I got a foster puppy once and he was on the floor playing with her, she was upside down on her back trying to sneak his treat and he was growling and snarling like he’d kill her. I said to my husband, “Oh no, the serial killer is playing with the baby!” He never hurt another dog in his life.
Often a mother dog has separation anxiety and passes this along to her pups because they know what she’s feeling, fear. So they react accordingly. The best breeders realize this and will find another nursing mom and transfer the pups to her instead so the fear won’t grow. This is a very common reason for anxiety.
Another cause is one people create by giving a dog/pup too much praise and a party whenever they let the pup out of a crate or return home.
The praise and a treat should be the gifts on the way OUT the door, a casual ‘see ya, here’s a cookie!’ Is all that’s needed. If you feel anxious or guilty and hug, kiss, lean on, or otherwise pass your anxiety to the pup then the dog/pup will pick it up.
Greeting when letting a dog out of a crate or arriving home says to the dog, being alone is scary and I can’t wait till my owner returns with praise and a treat meantime I’ll eat this blanket and couch cushion while waiting for the return party.
If crating, you can calmly say “crate” toss in a filled Kong or other food dispensing toy with treats and just walk out without looking back. You can also do this with an older dog but you’re going to have more work if you don’t crate. You’ll have to limit the area the dog can have. Gate the dog in one room for awhile with NOTHING it can chew except hard chew toys, or raw beef bones or the Kong. No clothing on the floor, no socks on the floor anything the dog can be harmed from must be out of that room but make sure there is water. Once that is successful, you can give the dog a larger area maybe 2 rooms; same deal about leaving. Keep adding rooms as the dog is more and more successful. Do not forget to let the dog out to pee/poop before you leave longer than half hour.
Keep in mind whatever you leave in the room with the dog that he/she can ruin is setting the dog up to fail. You don’t want the dog to fail and if you don’t personally witness the destruction as it occurs you cannot get upset and correct the dog...it is already too late for that. Clean up and say nothing or you can swear if it makes you feel better and let the dog watch...this worked for one of my smarter shepherds who ate my couch cushion. She was in the room while I picked up all the mess swearing like a sailor. All my other dogs were outside, she sat and watched me-and learned.
Any dog training class is a means of training the owner, not so much the dog, but the dog gets to perform in a new environment and must obey you in all circumstances even with distractions. You’ll teach the dog there can be communication between the two of you and the dog gains confidence. Some dogs you get at a shelter spent so much time alone it never communicated with a human and had no idea what stay or come means. You can even get a title on your obedience trained dog called a CGC, Canine Good Citizen, that should be the goal of your classes.
You need to practice at home, on walks, everywhere you go and allow strangers to hand a treat (you give them) to your dog allowing him/her to interact with other people.
There are good quality products to help an anxious dog, Rescue Remedy or any Calm Dog product even CBD can help. Keeping the dog on an even keel emotionally is the goal.
For a very anxious dog you may want to practice leaving. Do the “see ya, here’s a treat” then walk out the door and time it for one minute walk back in say ‘good job!’ And give a small treat. Then again during the day do it for 3 minutes and again for 5 minutes. Do this every day lengthening the time you are “gone”. Eventually get in the car, drive off someplace and come back in a half hour.
Hopefully all these ideas can help your dog overcome anxiety. Remember don’t overdo the return home. You can casually drop a treat and say “good boy”. That’s it-no party!