I wouldn't define what you're describing as a "compliment" but more as a "come-on," design to elicit a response. A sincere compliment is given out of appreciation without expectation; a come-on is given with a desire to get someone's attention. To me there's a difference on the way each comes across.

I’ve always been wary of compliments. I’ve seen guys (surprisingly enough) dish out the compliments one after another trying to get laid. I think it’s disgusting and demeaning. So much so, that I rarely compliment anyone. It always sounds fake and in writing this, it almost sounds like the scum dudes’ behavior has affected my behavior negatively.

I was walking down the street of New York City when I was about 18 years old. A guy walked by and said 'You have really beautiful eyes!' He kept on walking by so he wasn't trying to pick me up. It just made me feel really good.

I saw a lady shopping yesterday and she was having trouble finding her keys to get into her car. I really liked her dress and knew she was in an irritated mood so I told her I really liked her dress. Why? Because I really liked her dress.

Sometimes a compliment is just a compliment. I think we should try to make people feel good. These days people are not allowed to be nice to each other without being offended. It's too bad.

I don't go around here in the 21st century randomly complementing women on their looks. I did not even do it when I wasn't a married man. I assume women want to be affirmed for their expertise, character and accomplishments just like men do ... and any validation they seek from men concerning their attractiveness / "hotness" they would solicit from their significant other or paramours or whatever. To me, anything else is pointless objectification.

That said, in my experience if a woman is absolutely convinced that some aspect of her appearance is subpar, she will assume that any complement concerning it is insincere or ridiculous. Recently for example I made the mistake of complementing my wife on how her hair looked when she pinned it up in some new way. It was a completely honest sentiment, but it turns out she had gotten the hair clip for completely utilitarian reasons (to keep her unruly bangs out of her eyes) and thought it made her look "elderly" and so her response to me was a dismissive "pffft" and likely a tick on her list of insincere things I've ever said to her. I've seen this visceral reaction in other women too. It's one of those things that from a man's perspective makes relating to women a bit of a mine-field.

On the other hand there are facets of my wife's appearance that have long been a source of pride and joy to her ... and she'll eat up compliments about those. What am I to conclude from this other than that I'm supposed to figure out what she likes about herself and affirm those things, and figure out what she dislikes and never mention them, thus tacitly confirming her worst fears about herself? Which, ultimately, makes me think that the point of compliments, at least in this area, has never been to convey new information or to provide refuge from personal insecurities.

In fairness to my wife, she seems to apply this to me. Since most men in her life experience have been proud of, shall we say, a certain body part, she will compliment me on that to the point of it being, to me, a vaguely uncomfortable non-sequitur since I have no particular view on the matter. And then I wonder, how conditional her views of me are because they are connected to this physical aspect as opposed to something of actual value about me? Or if she's simply assuming I'm like many other men and need my shaky little ego propped up around that?

I guess at the end of the day we're all a little crazy around these things ...

I am far too cynical to offer anything substantive to this topic.

As a man, I've not had the experience of a "compliment" going too far. The answer, "I was just trying to be nice" is BS. Those people who take that path are not aware of their own inappropriate behavior. Their testosterone is in control of their brains (said another way their brains are between their legs!), not the "executive function" of their personalities (executive function is Freud's determination that the unconscious part of our thinking, the "id", is governed by the "ego" and "superego" which should stop us from making fools of ourselves).

I only compliment women l know, that way l completely avoid that mine field.

Sincerity is most important for any compliment to be taken seriously . Anything else is just an angle.

I've always been uncomfortable with most compliments. In school days, I was often the butt of some outside joke where girls or boys would compliment me and then mock me behind my back (think the movie mean girls where she goes 'omg I love your skirt so vintage' and then tells her friends it's ugly). I began to believe all compliments were actually insults. Then when I got older and kinda grew into myself and took care of how I looked, men would give me compliments that made me uncomfortable because it made me feel like they were appraising me not praising me. I still get them a lot.

I can only go by my 'ewww ick' meter. If someone gives me a compliment, I have learned (took me a life time) to accept it, say thank you and move on. (whether I agree with the compliment or not). However, if it gives me an uneasy feeling, I will either answer with either an eye roll, a laugh or selective hearing and discourage any further interaction.

Learn to say"thank you" and change the subject. Arguing with someone over a compliment they gave is extremely rude!

I'm not really into the compliment thing. I like the way a woman looks, I strike up a conversation, however, nothing wrong with a compliment or even a pickup line. It lets you know they're interested in you. Listen, men are basically stupid lol the pickup line or the cheesy compliment is all they know

Whats worse than a wolf whistle?
When you don't get one

I used to tell women when I liked something they were wearing. Then I was at a party and a woman was saying she hated it when some guy says, “I like your outfit.” So now, except when the woman is a good friend, I’ve pretty much stopped giving compliments. I love it when someone says something nice about what I’m wearing, but I suppose it’s different for women.

I personally think things like "Your eyes are pretty" or things like that are okay but "Damn you're hot" and "Your legs are sexy" can be weird. People should avoid words like "Hot" "sexy" and things like that unless they know you

OK, so I don't get the purpose of "compliments". Even the stated purpose often sounds manipulative.

If I genuinely like something, I will say so. But I am not focused on anyones "feels" when I do so.

If someone compliments me, if it is indicative of something they enjoy, I might choose to repeat it. But I don't get if I am supposed to give something in return as if I had gotten a gift or what?

So, given that compliments can be a form of manipulation, I am not at all sure what if anything I should do in response.

Color me clueless, I don't care!!

I think it's probably obvious to women when the compliment is sexually driven and that exposes the agenda of the complimenter immediately. Good way to filter them out if you ask me, unless the feeling is mutual. I suppose there are some clods out there who don't know how to express themselves any other way, but I doubt it. Overtly sexual compliments focusing on appearance (as you pointed out) are very telling.

the relationship between complimentor and complementee is important i think i mean they should have one and therefore know whether what they are saying is viewed positively or negativeley also random looking good/hot/whatever is really just insulting especially if just sprayed willy nilly

Say what you mean, mean what you say!

I'm not sure if it's a compliment or not, but get 'you look just like some one i used to know' a lot.

I light giving polite compliments. Beyond that I think its flirting.

I don't say anything to female co workers that I wouldn't say to men and I don't tell Robert how pretty he looks today.

I never compliment a woman on face or figure because it's too easily taken as a come-on. I simply admire silently and say to myself "mebbe someday......"

I try to compliment every person I meet. If I can't find anything pleasant about them I probably don't need to be in their presence. It really isn't that difficult, and might just bring a smile. Something so simple as "nice shoes" or "great car. ". There's no agenda other than brighten someone's day.

That's always a thin line that I never understood. Let me change the argument ... I am asking.... What is the correct way to give a compliment??