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Is it possible to keep your child away from the idea of religion? I want her to make her own choices about it as she grows up, not have others force feed her supernatural ideas. Is this realistic with her mother's side of the family being religious?

Antitheist30 4 Sep 19
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7

It's not even realistic if the mother is atheist. I was raised by 2 atheists and by 3rd grade the next door neighbor was telling me that if I didn't say the lord's prayer every night I would go to hell.

I spent the early part of my life accidentally offending people when I spoke my mind because I didn't realize that the things I was talking about were part of their religion.

Religion is too big a part of life to not explain it to your children.

4

Forbidden fruit is Very attractive, especially to teenagers. Far better to point out all the contradictions & fallacies, raising Thinkers!

4

Teach her to think critically, to ask the hard questions and expect answers that can pass scientific scrutiny. Trying to shield your child from the prevalent insanity of my hand fantasy is useless. Teach her or him to think!

4

No, it is probably not possible to shield her from religious ideas any more than the influenza virus. But teach her to think critically and she will be inoculated against a host of ailments including con artists, charlatans, grifters, deadbeats, clerics and clergy.

4

There are many interviews with people telling how to use the child fairy tales, Santa, tooth fairy and other stuff as scientific experiments to teach kids how to develop this way of thinking.
This is a famous one

But the kid will have influence of the society around, what you can do is to provide tools for the little one be able to deal with it.
3

It's impossible to avoid exposing a child to religious influence. They will. have friends who believe unquestioningly, because their parents have taught them to believe, unquestioningly.

In your position, the best you can do is counter this with rationality and explain your own beliefs (or lack thereof.)

3

how is she going to make up her own mind if she hasn't got all the information she needs? she needs to know religion exists. you can explain that it's not realistic, and that while belief doesn't make that side of the family stupid or bad, it is still (fill in adjective of your choice). it's better than letting her find out as an adult, find it alien and fascinating, and run off to join a cult!

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2

I have explained religion to my kids by saying that it's like Santa Claus the tooth fairy and the easter bunny but some people still believe the religious stuff all their lives and can be mean about it to people that don't believe it. You can always walk away.

2

Could be that we're just lucky with our son. He asked to go to church with the neighbors once. Came home, saying it was weird and hasn't asked to go again since. We neither encourage nor discourage him to be involved in a church. Some on this site seem to regard religion as a virus or sickness. If that's your take as well, it may be best to inoculate your daughter against them, not by denying her access but by talking to her about them and letting her go if one catches her interest and discussing her experience.

2

nope nor should it be your job is to expose her to as many experiences as possible and develop her decision making skills the more she knows the better decisions she can make.Never make it a them and us scenario just explain your beliefs and expose her to as much you can that interests you museums art galleries libraries social groups sports world politics will all help.Your children don't belong to you your just ensuring they get the best start in life and are able to function as members of a diverse and infuriating world good luck

2

Your best bet is not to try to keep your child in ignorance, but rather expose them to as many different systems of belief as possible... Including critical thinking, and magical thinking versus scientific logic.

camne Level 7 Sep 19, 2018
2

No, and it's a bad idea to try IMO. A parents role is to prepare their kids for the world, by helping them understand it. How can you do that if you exclude a large section of society?

That's how hatred and intolerance grows - just look how extreme religious and right wing groups try to exclude groups they don't approve of.

1

Perish the thought. To be ignorant of anything is to be vulnerable to it.

1

Thought periods of unfulfilled seeking, the only thing I learned is that we should know of other religions, if for nothing but to understand people. My children have had deep convos about Judaism, Christianity, Quaker etc.... My ex is Catholic and works for a Catholic group. I want my kids to a) feel comfortable in their beliefs b) see me as a source of neutral education.

OwlRN Level 4 Sep 19, 2018
1

No you can’t....she will be exposed to it at school. She needs to have all the information from all sides to be able to make an informed choice when she is old enough to do so. It will be a mistake to try to stop her mixing with other children who will mostly be Christian presumably, she would just end up feeling isolated and friendless, and could resent you for it,

0

My three children went to a church-funded primary school since it was the only one within walking distance of our house. They got a fair amount of religious teaching which I countered at home. They have all three grown up atheists. Two of my grandchildren now go to the same school and I expect the same result! As other people have said, the important thing is to teach your children to think and question and ask for/look for evidence.

0

My children were never very interested in religion they seemed to have different needs given that their parents were both atheist I guess they had more time to think for themselves. they liked ot read books or have them read to them and they were always the ones they themselves picked out at the library.

0

No, your child is and will all ways be imprinted with ideas out of her control. She will believe stuff without question and won't even know why. She didn't even get to pick her name in this life. Your only option is to give her tools for personal freedom. But the real question is "Are you going to be OK with her choices when she becomes free to be who she wants to be???"

0

It’s neither realistic nor healthy. Over sheltering a child isn’t just a Christian thing.
Instead, teach her the importance of critical thinking.

0

If you took the time during cultivation of your relationship to discuss the issue before having the child it can still work without a lot of friction. At home can reflect the outer world with parents who both wish to influence children in their respective ways who mutually respect their differences and approach presenting the different points of view to the children in an environment of love and acceptance of each other's differences. It is, I think, an optimal way to allow children to reason things for themselves, as long as both parents respect the children's rights to form their own ideas.

One thing we all know is that whatever outlooks children form for themselves might be, they will change along the way in life. Differences over religion or any other kinds of ideologies (or non) don't have to be competing or conflicting if people teach children respect by exemplifying it.

0

I doubt it. Like Im sure others have said I think your best bet at innoculating against religion is to immerse them in all kinds of it. Teach them about all the mythologies and religious customs you can and their varieties around the world so that no one system can ever claim to be the only truth. Keeping them away from religion to prevent indoctrination is like keeping them away from water to prevent drowning, or keeping them in a sterile bubble to prevent challenges to their immune system. Better to teach them how to swim amongst it without effect. Expose them to as many ideological germs as you can so their young minds learn how to fight it off.

0

I had that very situation. The short answer to can you keep them away from the idea of religion would seem to me patenltly impossible. However... What you CAN do is protect them from those ideas. Im my case... I was 'protected' from my mother's harsh religion by my dad taking us kids to the Unitarian Church. And... By teaching by example it is OK to think for yourself. So when I had children with a former Catholic... I too protected them. The exact same way... And their mother joined in. Enthusiastically which helped a good deal I admit. That her Catholic family had no clue what a 'Unitarian' was helped too... Until they came to visit once. Then they were horrified. It so happened that week we had a Atheist former Clergyman guest speaking.... And not a bible to be seen anywhere. When other kids at school asked my girls why they didn't't go to church... ( very tiny town) they replied that they do! Just in the nearby large city. So it was a sort of immunization. Against the religion of my in-laws and others. And it worked. Best of luck to you.

0

Rather than hide your children away, teach them to be critical thinkers, and to question everything. My kiddo was cornered by a member of the Gideon recently. We were at a county fair, they asked her if she would like some "free books", and then when she objected, they spoke over her and forced her to have her picture taken holding the bible. She was very upset, and knew that her personal space and consent was violated, but her friend who has very Christian parents, couldn't see why she was so upset. I have even taken her to in the past, so that she can see what it is all about. Then we have discussed it afterwards, and she has no problem poking holes in the information she was given. I am a big advocate for the idea that people fear what they don't understand, and that when make something taboo, especially for kids. It peaks their interest and with it being off limits, there is no open line of communication to discuss it.
That being said, that is what works for me and at the end of the day, you know your kid better than anyone else. You know what they can handle. ❤

0

I raised 4 children with the idea that it is better they find their own way. My mom was a very old school religious zealot.. I felt religion is apart of any community so when my mom wanted to take my kids to church or bible camp in the summer, I would tell my kids knowldege is power. Learn how people think, see how religion works. My son ask me once, do you believe in god? I told him I have never seen this god he is talking about, but that doesnt mean that god is not real. I taught them religion exists for the masses, to control and dominate. I taught them to be curious and to ask questions. Not to be satisfied with the status quo. My oldest doesnt believe in god.. and she doesnt raise my grandkids to believe in that either. My second child is a babtist, who doesnt even speak to me anymore, because of her misplaced belief in a need for a higher power to guide her and my lack of need for one. my 3rd child complete atheist. My 4th, believes and he is only 18, and the only boy, that the universe has structure, and that it looks like it was created by a higher power than us. That the power would need us to worship him, he doesnt believe like that. He is still exploring, a freshman in college. I did not raise them with the irresponsable idea that the world is gonna end soon...any day now..., like I was raised, in a scared dead way.I have also grown in my self belief which I pass on to my kids, I am very open to the possibilty that anything could be possible, but we only have maybe 80 years, so what do you really want to think about because it goes by fast!! Love whats real, trust your senses! I felt like it was my responsibilty to raise kids who wld eventually raise more and do away with the whole worship god religion.. and make a new world order...lol..

0

Thank you all for your wisdom. I do understand she (my young daughter) will be exposed to religion. I just needed ideas on how to make her realize how it is nonsence. You guys did not disappoint.

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