It always surprises me, how many men have no clue. And how many women do these things without a second thought.

This is a huge reminder to me because I had forgotten that I do all these things on a daily basis. They are so ingrained into my being, that I just don't notice them any more.

I've been giving this a lot of thought since my initial response yesterday.

I think the men who ask the question simply do not get it.
That's it. They just don't get it.
I also think most of them don't want to get it, either.

I re-read this, and most of the comments quite a few times, and had changed what my comment was going to be about 100 times.
So I've prepared myself for all the hate responses that I'll probably get.

First off, I by no means at all am trying to belittle any of the horrible ways a lot of women get treated by men.
It's down right inexcusable.

But one thing I have to say here is for one, it's not ALL men that treat others like this, there are many who would never treat a woman like that.
Second, I've known some men (including myself) that have been victomised by women. Yes, it does happen.
If you think that women are the only ones that get abused, raped, assaulted etc. Watch any prison doc. that will put an end to that kind of thinking right away.

Again, I really do understand (as much as I can) the horrible shit that some men do to not just women, but to anyone.
But I've also seen and lived some horrible shit some women have done to men as well.

I guess what I am trying to say here is that I don't like it when anyone categorises people in one group. There are many different kind of people, and just as many different kinds of behaviour.

I think it's a good idea to talk about how EVERYONE, should or should not be treated.
JMHO.

Great post, thanks for that.

It's always surprising how some groups just can't see the pain of a separate group. I saw a youtube video recently of a guy who was a gamer and posted how he doesn't use a specific piece of software anymore because the company said they didn't need another white male youtuber as a representative. He called the company racist and the comments were a wave of "how dare they! BOYCOTT!!" Not one person stopped to think, damn so this is what minorities go through on a regular basis. It's not racism that people are concerned with, it's only racism against their race.

I see the same thing here, men will often huff and puff when there is a perceived sexist line against them, but won't consider at all to see what women go through regularly.

For the benefit of the men reading this thread, I feel like I should add: I don't generally smile at men I don't know. It's not because I "hate" men in general, or even that I don't trust men in general--it's that I care so much about potentially catching the eye of the one person that maybe wants to hurt me that I don't have anything left to invest in caring about the hundreds of people whose feelings are maybe hurt because I didn't smile back at them.

Honestly, IDNGAF if you think I'm a stuck-up bitch. I care about staying alive, and unraped, unbeaten, unstalked, unharassed. It's worth it. Anyone who wants to guilt me over this is not someone I want to be around.

A woman's senses is heightened every time she ventures out alone. They just are. I remember running early one morning and running past a group of men on the other side of the street. I remember to make eye contact (to let them know that I see them), but keep running. Of course, they just had to say something: "Hey, come here! I want to talk to you!" Or walking across the parking lot to work, a guy has to drive up (which puts me on alert) and catcall me (I told him to fuck off, which then he started to call me a bitch, blah, blah, before driving off). Or on another day leaving my car and walking to work, a guy in a minivan pulls up in front of me before I could get to the door and starts to jack off for a few moments before driving off. These are just some of many inappropriate situations that I have endured, and I haven't even mentioned the physical ones.

Women and girls are unsafe in America, and all over the world.

Since age 15, I have been grabbed, kissed, fondled, sexually assaulted, stalked by two different men, and catcalled. Two supervisors tried to rape me at work: Tacoma Family YMCA and an insurance agency. I dress modestly.

Both times I hiked alone, I was frightened by men.

"Hey pretty lady! Where are you sleeping tonight? We'll join you!" hunters called, leering. On horses with rifles, they were heading up for the high hunt.

This was a women's backpacking trip. One-by-one, my friends dropped out. I hiked in alone. One friend planned meet me in the morning. She never did.

I spent a terrified night awake in the tent, jumping at every snap in the woods. At dawn, I broke camp and fled. Carrying a 50-lb. pack, I RAN.

The result is PTSD. Walking, I constantly scan people around me. Never look at my phone while walking. Cross the street to avoid men. Lock my doors. Never live in a ground-floor apartment. Never walk or run after dark. I never go to bars. Every time I went to a bar- to watch my alma maters, Univ. of Michigan and Univ. of Washington, in the Rose Bowl - men grabbed me, and wouldn't leave me alone. I'm not safe.

Never park beside a van. At 113 lbs, I could easily be grabbed and thrown in, raped and killed. This happened to Carol, 16, my sister's best friend. Carol's naked, raped and beaten body was found in a ditch two weeks later.

At 19, my daughter was raped and severely beaten in her bed at college. She was asleep when he attacked her. The rapist was a college student who plans to be an attorney.

Four girls took the rapist to court. Claire was re-traumatized facing her rapist by testifying in other girl's trials.

It infuriated me that the rapist's attorney got the judge to not register the rapist as a sexual predator. Since then, a federal law requires all convicted rapists to be registered as sexual predators.

Nine years later, Claire still wakes up screaming. She still has panic attacks.

We have guys in our midst who act like dominant male chimpanzees. We really have not evolved very far, have we?

I think some men are getting their eyes opened a little.

What a powerful post.

Doesn't really refer to being "pissed off". True, the above does highlight what women go through all the time. To make this analysis refer to being pissed off, it does show all the added baggage women have to lug around. These current supreme court hearings show how women have to take so much shit from men. Considering the suffragette movement, Rosa Parks, Anita Hill have had to go through would highlight in a better way why women are justifiabfy pissed off. While we're at it, call the Senate switch board before today, Friday Sept. 28th @ 202-224-3121 now. You will be directed to your Senator, tell her/him to NOT vote for Kavanaugh's nomination.

This article is spot on. And its truly sad that this is 2018 and a lot of guys still are so unaware - what the hell is it going to take?

It saddens me that this is even an issue. It's terrible that women have to be constantly on the defensive because of this very real, virtually constant, danger.

I have zero expectation that any of this is going to change.
None.
Sure, all this effort into trying to raise awareness is great.
I just don't really see it making that much of a difference.

You have to watch this man's TED Talk. I post it at least once a year to my FB page. If I could figure out how to do it, I'd work with this man. He's putting amazing information about there on not just the toxicity of "Manhood" but how it's making men suffer, too.

A few days after i was assaulted when i was 12 by a family friend who lived with us, i had to go to an official police interview. When getting ready, my mother told me not to wear bright lipstick. "We don't want them [the police] thinking you were asking for it."

I quit wearing feminin or revealing clothes at that point.

We know what kind of scum Brett Kavanaugh and Donald Trump are, we know exactly what their kind are like and we shun them for the twisted and perverted weaklings that they are. Please don't make the mistake of lumping us in with the misogynists because we aren't, we're feminists just like you. Don't accept all women as feminists by default either, we know that isn't the case, many are more sexist against their sisters than Brett Kavanaugh ever could be and they do this consciously.

[agnostic.com] There still are,good decent Men,available in the dating World,some are scarred from bitter divorces,and also Widowers who have lost their partner in life. We are not all predators.......

Not making light of this but rephrase the question. Draw the same line and ask. "What do you do on a daily basis to prevent being assaulted?" Just omit that one word and see the difference. Men are far more likely to be a victim of assault. Not sexual granted but it can and does kill you. When men say that a woman was dressed provocatively, it is not necessarily an accusation. Ask a guy if he would walk into a rival teams bar wearing his home teams shirt? The answer would be "I don't have a death wish". We have to learn from a very early age to deal with violent assault. Never mind puberty, we learn this in kindergarten. Staying in well lite areas, avoiding eye contact, puffing your chest out and straightening up to look more formidable are second nature to us.
It is good that men get to know how women have to go though life but it might be beneficial for women to know how we go through life too?

My son in law was taught by his parents to cross the street at night if he is coming up behind a woman so that he doesn't freak her out. I was discussing this with a man friend and he thought that it was my son in law letting his actions be controlled by the unwarranted fear of some woman. Would that sound like a man friend who is insensitive to the problems that women face on a daily basis? I fear so.

This makes me smad (sad and mad.)

This guy doesn't ask that question. And there are also lots of other men who don't either. Better to say SOME guys ask why women are so pissed off. That would be a lot more accurate.

My first husband was abusive and I was traumatized to the point of finding it difficult to function in life. I was pissed too. But no matter what I did when I was pissed, I failed to change my situation. It's only been as I've gained control over my anger and learned to respectfully set boundaries that things have significantly changed in my life.

I think it's good for men to understand that many of their gender pose a real threat to women. All men should be asking themselves if their behavior may be contributing to the problem. Many of my ex-husband's actions in our marriage are considered rape but neither he nor I understood that. You men could be doing harm without being aware of it.

On the other hand, women need to learn to allow men to learn their lessons themselves and not try to shove them down their throats. Nothing is more effective at prompting self reflection in others than persistent and respectful boundary setting. But in order to do that, you have to respect yourself and learn to put aside your anger. As women learn to set boundaries against men in respectful ways, they will see success in their efforts to be treated fairly.

That is very true. Men without having things pointed out have for very long been trained by both parents how to live and react in society (this goes for most of the world). I remember studying linguistics and seeing the evidence of sexist language in the English language alone to whit showing there are more derogatory terms to describe females than males.
These thoughts and actions are one of the reasons that I, in high school, predicted a black male President of the United States before a woman. Note black men got the vote (at least legally) in 1868 while women here did not until 1920. I grew up in a rural, very religious and Christian oriented farming area. Many there haven't changed much over the years. I got thrown out of class, even before school stared one day for insulting Billy Graham by insinuating he was a drunk who sold an Elixer named Christ. Such fun times to have been liberal minded. Mostly I got thrown out for arguing with the teacher, whose father was an evangelical minister (who also happened to run a notoriously poorly operated old folks home, now called senior centers), over how I didn't believe I had to "watch it" because I didn't believe her god was going to get me.