Like all art, the pieces that are the most appreciated come from the heart. When you write openly and honestly about how you feel, we feel it as well. And while pain is often associated with creating art that moves or touches people, it doesn't have to be only painful. Any strong emotion, such as pure joy (birth of your first child), anger (someone tries to hurt a loved one) or even combinations of emotions (getting mugged, feeling scared and angry) can bring people on a journey - your journey - with you.

I think if you open yourself up to those emotions you'll find that not only is your writing more interesting and stronger, the process of coalescing those raw emotions into words can be extremely cathartic - like an emotional colonic.

Ok, maybe not the best metaphor, but you get the point. ?

Take them on, go through them. Remind yourself that the event is over and
you totally survived it. It didn't kill you then, and it won't kill you now.

Probably a voice recorder for the worst bits.

Hard to write in that state of gut wrenching release.

Get snotty.. ..recover, and move on ~

It's therapeutic to write thoughts about experiences, good and bad. I once wrote a story about something extremely negative that happened to me. It was read aloud at a public event . Several people got up and left the room, crying. Nobody knew the author or that I was even there. They just knew it was a true story. I felt relieved that others were touched. Later people were talking about it saying they had similar experiences but couldn't talk about it and felt alone. After having heard my story, they realized it wasn't exclusive. I felt like I helped someone.

This has worked for me: just write through the feelings, and don't edit as you do. Then put it away and come back to it later, with fresh eyes and a calmer perspective. There's power in our feelings, it's a matter of being able to get them out on paper (or on screen, wherever you feel your writing flows best) where you can see them.

You could try writing in the third person, as though the events you are describing are happening to someone else. Having said that, first drafts are the hardest, so get everything out there first, add structure, sequence and context in subsequent drafts. Good luck!

Part of what I do as a columnist is bare my soul to whoever happens to be reading. I've written about the times I wanted to kill myself, bad memories, etc. What I've tried to do as part of the writing is talk about what I gleaned from it. You know, how did that help me grow? How did it shape me? What small victory did I pull from that?

The writing process is an adrenaline rush when you really get going. Feel what you feel, don't hide from it, and impart it into the piece. No one is so unique as to have been the only one to ever feel a certain way. It will help your readers connect with you emotionally because some of them will identify with those feelings. At least, it should make them think.

I wish you the best in your memoir.