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I hate the getting to know you phase 😣

Capricorn 6 Jan 23
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18 comments

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I always thought it was fun...

It's actually been a little over a month and I have no complaints

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How else do you think that you will gather insight on whether or not that might be the right person for you?

Didn't say it's not necessary, I said I hate it

1

Getting the fake exterior out of the way and getting down to getting comfortable with showing the real you to another person can be a trying time. I think that period can best be handled by being totally, brutally honest.

See I don't come fake, you get my authentic self from day 1 it would be easier if men did the same, but most times they don't

0

I hate it too. It takes way too long.

Like watching damn paint dry. Lol

1

Sure can be exhausting

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To me that’s one of the most intersting, scary, exhilarating, fun, creative parts of a relationship ☺️☺️☺️

Can't argue that but it's the crash & burn that fucks up everything

@Soarfeet you can say that again, it's like you hope for the best but expect the worst. Thanks!

@Capricorn true, true ???

1

I don't know. The finding things in common thing can be exciting. The "hey, that's new" thing expands my world. It's when you don't mesh that it gets awkward. Always a willing victim 😉

I am a glutton for punishment

0

??? Open up your ears, open up your eyes, learning can be fun for the over who tries! ???

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Takes some time that is for sure.

Yes it does!

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That's the best part! Well, it can be the best part or... the no so good revealing part (if it is, at least, now you know. End it if necessary and put it behind you. Hopefully you haven't invested too much time.) Otherwise, discovery is fun!

It's in the infancy stages but so far so good

2

Well it’s got to be better than “ what’s your name again? “ or the twenty on the dresser is for your cab.

0

The getting to know you phase never ends. It's a lifelong cycle of experiences and personal growth. And sometimes that growth can lead people closer together or further apart. At some point you find yourself wondering if it was worth it or not. As long as the relationship is emotionally healthy enough that each party has their own boundaries, independence, and individuality, the relationship will be less likely to fail. And communication. ALWAYS communicate.

Absolutely agree but right now he's in the "probationary period" so hopefully all his hard work and determination will land him the fulltime position ?

3

It's better than the, "Oh shit, I thought I knew you but I don't", stage.

Amen to that. Talk about a nightmare.

True that!

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5

It beats the heck out of the Looking For Someone to Start Getting to Know phase.

I was there most of 2018

2

Sometimes l feel it requires more energy than I have.

I think if it takes too much time and effort, it probably isn't meant to be and maybe time to move on. Because when it clicks, well it's just great!

1

Girl! Who are you kidding!?!

I tell guys, "Look. I'm nobody special. You don't have to pretend to be anyone else around me. Be yourself (bad habits and all). The truth ALWAYS comes out, might as well be now. I might like you."

I treat men the way I want a woman to treat either one of my two sons.

You're right. People are on their "best behavior" for the first few months and then they start relaxing.

I immediately start looking for red flags, sad part is I'm typically the one who gets the Axe because what I tell them up front they either don't believe, or think they can get me to follow their way of thinking... Nope

2

True, you never know what you're getting in the "sell phase". Some guys can keep that up for months.

This is true that's why I'm always prepared for the other shoe to drop

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