First, don't think you are the problem
Second, I intended to write a longer comment, but it seems everything I wanted to tell you have already being written in the previous comments. So, why bother you by repeating them?
When the going gets tough,...

I find the distance is a real problem, and the other problem... l find this is a very unsatisfactory way to communicate. Things are taken wrong and there is no voice or personality to judge chemistry, so we make it up in our head and it is mostly wrong. You invest a lot of time messaging you get excited about talking on the phone, and when you do it isn't working for one or both of you. Now I am reluctant to talk on the phone. I have been here for 15 months. I have talked on the phone extensively to a lady that knocked me out. I liked the way she looked, dressed, and the sound of her voice. She is funny, smart, and empathetic. Distance and age difference proved to be too much. The women I have talked to on the phone (5), have all been very nice and I have enjoyed my conversations with all of them. If I met any of them in the real world I could see us becoming friends at the very least.

It can be hard, to be honest, and upfront about all the facts of who you are to other people but that is the only way you will find out if they can handle all of who you are as a person. If they are not capable of excepting you for being you then they don't deserve you and you don't need them in your life.

Not easy the distance gap can be a problem takes getting used to but keep plugging away

There are no men my age near me on this website. I live in rural, conservative, Christian Wenatchee, WA aka Eastern Washington.

Through Fitness Singles, I met Bill, a medical doctor. He reached out first.

Ten years younger than me, Bill is extremely fit, kind, patient and hilarious. An extraordinary lover. Medical people often make great lovers because of their knowledge of anatomy.

Love flying in his private plane!

"Where do you want to go?" Bill asks. Over the Cascade Mountains where I love to hike. "Here are the mountains you love, sweetheart," he said.

In the last photo, Bill is on the left (yellow shirt). He is a competitive bicycle rider who lifts weights.

I can relate to a lot of what you said. Getting to know some of the women on this site thru the discussion boards is a double edged sword. On the one hand, it proves to me that I am not undateable at all, unlike my experience with Match, which only makes me feel frustrated and discouraged about the process of finding someone compatible to date. And I think that is because the vast majority of people on here are very different, mostly in a good way, from the mainstream population of the US, particularly that of my local area. However, that's probably why there are very few active members here from my area, and those that are skew more towards being male. The result is that while the site provides me some validation that I am not undateable and am compatible with a decent number of hipster non-believers, it also probably provides me some false or artificial hope that is not very realistic for finding someone compatible in my local area, where there seem to be very few women my age, at least on Match, who are available and looking to date who share the same qualities as most of the women my age here on Agnostic. And one of those qualities, if the women on Agnostic are being honest here on the boards, is that they are more open-minded and less shallow about looks than most women on sites like Match. It almost feels torturous at times.

I don't blame this site for my frustration, but the difference between it and sites like Match is huge, tho much of that is because this site allows people to get familiar with others more deeply and naturally instead of the very impersonal, competitive, and brief introduction process of the paid sites, as well as the fact that is attracts a very different, non-conformist type of member than a paid site, which will attract more often people who are more mainstream than us in culture and lifestyle.

It's really easy to share only the parts of yourself that you like, and up lying via omission. This can be on accident or on purpose. Calling ourselves on our own shit is an important skill to work on, even if none of us get very good at it.

Definitely not feeling worse, but I'm sorry that you are. I met someone special here about 18 months ago. She's super far away, so that is definitely an issue, but otherwise things are quite good. Don't give up, either - reasonable proximity is also possible! I've seen it happen here, too.

Regarding honesty and omission, I can't speak to your particulars, whether you should have said more sooner or whether your friends' expectations were premature. Online is tough bc there are so many people who aren't genuine or who are unrealistic or who expect to be recognized for who they are before the other person is sure s/he is talking to a real person and not just a really good actor. If it is something like that, don't be too hard on yourself. Apologize if you think that's appropriate, but also forgive yourself in any case, regardless.

Be assured that you will survive your problems.

That just sounds like life, and learning from past mistakes to me. Apologize to them if you feel it would help anything, but don't beat yourself up over it.

I meet the love of my life here with zero expectations. It can work, but like any other way of meeting people it can be tough to find the right person - assuming the right person is even there when you are.