Clearly you've been hanging out with the wrong beach people

@Remi Yes I am sure there are interesting people on the beach, but the beach certainly attracts the boring ones in droves, hardly ever met a dull one up a mountain.

@Fernapple I was up the mountains in the rain forest today in fact and I get what you mean. I love it there, but I am also drawn to the water. It's a bay where I live so little waves especially this time of year, Winter here. I find it meditative finding a place alone with the stillness of the water drawing me......calling me.

I'm generally intolerant of small talk. It's more like a handshake for me — fine just to start a conversation but awkward if it lasts too long. After a minute or so, I need it to move into something more substantial or the conversation fizzles. That's not to say that every discussion needs to be about philosophy or current events or the arts, but for me it needs to come around to something that at least one of us considers to be important (e.g., something meaningful in their life, at work, with family). If we just talk about the weather for 20 minutes, unless I'm talking with a farmer or a meteorologist, I can't maintain any interest.

@resserts oh I gotcha. I totally get that and agree. I was thinking more along the lines of chatting for 10 minutes with someone you don’t know while at the store or something

@Marcie1974 Oh, I see. Yeah, I can manage a few minutes to socialize about generic topics with strangers when we're in line or in a waiting room or wherever.

good idea

If it is more boring than my village you have my sympathy.

@Fernapple IamSure is not a contest but....you would be surprised

@IamNobody you live in a van down the river. Ever thought about moving into town? lol

@MsDemeanour The river is nice and the van is broken, IamStuck

If they wern't boring they would have found a friend.

@Fernapple in a heartbeat!

Ah, but it's no longer small talk once it's a topic that's of great interest that those engaged in conversation find meaningful, because they're no longer talking about the superficial — instead getting into the details. It's the difference between, "Your garden seems to be growing well" and "What do you use to get rid of the worms that attack the radishes? I tried ProductX last year, but it didn't help."

If our asshole president gets re-elected, there just might be an influx of Americans in lots of places. It would be known as The Great Evacuation, like rats leaving a sinking ship, which, sad to say, it is. But hey, we had a good 200 year run, if you don’t count the genocide of the Natives, the slavery, the religious bigotry, the near-constant wars, the messing around in other country’s politics, the oligarchy of the wealthy, not to mention the absurd notion of American exceptionalism, and now a malignant narcissist as president...wait, where was I going with this?

Your point is so true about groups where there may only be one common denominator. In my case, I have found that with Agnostic.com and the women on there from my area. I have had no luck with finding someone to date in my local area from this site because even tho they are fellow non-believers, it appears that we have little in common besides that for the most part. They are usually very much a part of the mainstream culture and lifestyle here in every other way than religion and I am not.

I joined a local singles group, not on Meetup, that had been around for a long time. Almost everyone was way older than me, it was mostly women. Almost all of them were boring and not well-educated or intellectual. The women were pretty much bitter divorcees who were locked into never dating again. They were almost all very conservative and traditional. I didn't fit in at all with them. I made one friend, a woman who was more like me than the rest of them, out of the group. I quit going after several months. Except for the friend that I still have, it was a waste of time.

@TomMcGiverin you made a friendship that lasted! i don't call that a waste of time.

g

@genessa It was otherwise.

@TomMcGiverin I see what you mean. I'm educated myself and I believe in life-long learning, but I don't think one needs a formal education to learn about the world. Also I am widowed and not divorced so don't get into the 'bagging men' brigade. I had a wonderful husb but he's been gone 20 yrs. I carry him in my heart but it would be nice to have a companion to grow old with.

I used to be an outgoing gal. Maybe it's my age but mostly I want to stay home. I don't really have anyone here I hang with regularly. I really wanted to see The Pixies when they came here, but all the cool kids don't want to hang with a fifty something chick. And it would have been too depressing to go by myself.

Besides this site (which I'm ecstatic is much more than a dating site), I am on another dating site and it is cringeworthy. I'll be 55 in a couple of weeks (but I'm 30 something in my head). It took me 8 years to find someone who wanted to be with me regularly. And now that that's gone belly up, I'm hoping I'm not waiting another 8 years.

Truthfully, I'd love just to hang out with someone who has similar likes and tastes as me.

Ah that's just what I'm looking for! No age limit on having fun. And what a wonderful way to explore the country. Thanks for adding the pics. I was amused at the thought of the 'three-wheeler'. My first bike was a tricycle.....perhaps it will be my last bike too.

@MsDemeanour, don’t know if they ship them down your way, but they are really popular with the ladies and older riders in my group. Never talked to anyone who wasn’t happy with theirs.
[can-am.brp.com]

@Barnie2years Yes we do have them but they're rare. I recall reading on a FB page a guy bragging about his three-wheeled trike. Someone replied with a sarcastic "you're mother must be so proud". Each to their own but I'd like to keep my two wheels as long as possible.

@MsDemeanour, me too. The red Vulcan 900 to the right side of the group picture is mine. Just traded in my Kawasaki 1500 Nomad I bought new in 1999. I’ve been riding since I was 15 (now 67).

Obviously, I'm not as smart as I thought I was because I had to look up the word sapiosexual. I'm one too! For me, it must include humour, so quick wit and playful banter is essential. Sadlly, most men do not like women who are smarter or funnier than them.

lol life's too short Gareth