What are your views on meaningless sex?
It depends on your definition of meaningless. If you mean no great attraction but its the only game in town. Then it
s not what I would go for now. If you mean one night stand and "lets do it coz I fancy you" then that`s something else. I got back with the mother of my daughter and it was not great for me because although I still had great affection for her. I did not really want her in that way. I did it so I could have a better relationship with my daughter but I felt like a hooker. Ended up doing 2 years detox from sex altogether. I also (not at the same time) had a one nighter with a full on lesbian. Now you could say that was meaningless but it certainly was one for the bedpost. I have done hook-up sites and the whole "hello my name is Jane Doe. I like .... Lets get it on. " Does not sit well with me now either
Personally, I think I have an unusual attitude towards sex. I enjoy it as a deeply connecting experience between lovers, but I also see it as an enjoyable social interaction and would be completely happy if we lived in a society where sexual contact was as common as a hug — between people of any gender and age, and regardless of relationship status.
By society's standards that's considered unhealthy, and I — of course — wouldn't step outside of the 'societal contract', nor would I go off and have casual sex if my partner would be offended by that.
But I see it like this: is sex shameful? Corrupting? 'Dirty'? Is carnality something we should feel bad about? I'd say no — not without religion telling us so. I've never been able to connect to society's anxiety about sexuality. But that does just seem to be me — I may have something psychological going on there, but it doesn't worry me too deeply.
I wonder if we are carrying the baggage of uptight religious attitudes towards sex without recognising it. Yeah, the obvious stuff that tackles human rights is getting knocked down now — sex before marriage, LGBQT rights, gender equality — but I think we still hold onto an underlying anxiety about sex as a corrupting influence.
...But why? It's a conversation that I'm fascinated by.
@DaveMania yes
Sometimes you just gotta scratch that itch. I see nothing wrong with no-strings-attached sex occasionally.
Apparently you have had that pleasure... so have i ...its nice...and fun... always apply protection.
I've had meaningless sex in my youth. One night stands etc. I never planned for them to be one night stands, it's just how they turned out.
They seemed exciting at the time and a source of ego boosting affirmation. Then one Sunday morning, after a one night stand the previous night, I found myself stood alone at bus stop in a town I didn't know.
I felt completely empty on the inside in a way I've never felt before, and I vowed to never have casual sex again.
Good for you... theres those red flags of going to a motel and waking up alone. You have to be selective and creative.
I spent enough wasted years feeling used as a sperm receptacle with the ex. It has to mean something or I'm out. I value myself more than to just throw it away on someone only wanting to get their dick wet.
Don't spend so much time looking to connect with Mr. Right that you miss out on some really wonderful sexual experiences with Mr. Right Now.
Remember that your sexual peak is set to a very limited time clock, and once that time clock ticks down to zero you can't just push a reset button to make your body 18 all over again. Take every opportunity to enjoy what your body can do for you now while you still have the ability.
Don't tell me what to do.
Hey, you do what you want. I don't recall any of my post being an order. It was advice. Follow it or don't. But don't say that nobody stepped up to say something when you're old, decrepit and waiting around to die.
Self defined, I think. It’s meaningless. At least in my opinion.
Lol...ok.
I believe sex with someone you care deeply about and vice versa is one of life's precious moments. It's special. That's what I prefer...not big on one night stands or notches on the bedpost.
Your to romantic. Get out there and live a little.
I must at least feel genuine affection for a man before I'll have sex with them. One night stands have happened...but it was the result of strong chemistry.
@BucketlistBob
Everyone is different.
@Freespirit64. She blinded me with science....
Watch "She Blinded Me with Science - Thomas Dolby" on YouTube
I went through a "slutty phase" and meaningless sex was not necessarily the goal, but I was ok with it. Well mostly ok with it, so many guys are selfish in bed and/or don't realize that women can actually orgasm if you put a little bit of effort into it. I'm ready for something meaningful now though. In the meantime I have a few FWB that we take care of our mutual needs.
*Please, no one take offense at the term slutty phase. I own my sexuality and am not ashamed of it. That being said...it was sort of a slutty phase, lol.
The word slut only means one thing.
@evestrat thank you!! I also embrace the term. I had an exchange with a woman on here that got offended when I referred to myself as female (she eventually blocked me) so I figured I'd get flack for using the term slut.
@Ellatynemouth what is the one thing it means?
Can I just say...
Of course you're free to use those words, but by extension I also have the freedom to complain about it because I find it offensive. It works both ways. And here's the definition:-
slut
slʌt/
nounderogatory
dated
a woman with low standards of cleanliness.
Did you actually read my comment?
@evestrat I knew you'd be way more articulate than me so thanks for responding.
@Ellatynemouth well 1. fits me to a T. I have had many casual sexual partners. I just happen to not find anything wrong with it. Therefore, I’m not offended by the term.
Good for you.
If I had many sexual partners, I'd say I had a healthy sex life.
Oh please. What a bunch of nonsense in this thread. Conveniently ignoring your use of masturbation dildos and vibrators.
Everyone likes meaningless sex. Some of you have to rely on it. All sex is beneficial.
That's masturbation.
@Ellatynemouth "Self Rape" according to some sects
@LenHazell53
If you believe in that sort of thing.
For me there is no such thing as meaningless sex, cause even one night stand has a meaning. I think sex is anyway a kind of proper way of communication with other person. This is a celebration of joy, how could be meaningless?
There are hormonal influences during sex that encourage attachment. If interested you can start here: [sitn.hms.harvard.edu]
Those seem to affect some people more than others. Hurt feelings can develop from that imbalance. People can manipulate.
There are STDs and medical implications.
I've had enough.
There is no such thing as meaningless sex. You can share a wonderful and meaningful sexual experience with someone which lasts a couple of hours, a couple of weeks, a couple of years or a lifetime.
Meaningful experiences with other human beings should not have a criteria attached to them. If it was good and fulfilling for the parties involved for as long as it lasted, then that's all that matters.
Meaning is something you give to things, not a property of things. It is only meaningless if you want it to be so; you can give any meaning to any act you want, including sex. Now, if you want your sex to be meaningless, then it's your choice and I don't see any problem with it.
I will need further experimentation to be able to provide a well considered response.
Snap! Nice one KC.
Define meaningless sex... i can't describe it. Friends with benefits are fun. Of course a lot of people get attached if its mind blowing. They think thats love.