4am and my body hurts sleeping on the hard floor but it's better than when I slept on the streets last summer having to hide all the drug addicts and alcoholics trying to rob you in your sleep. I wish I could lay down next to a woman who loved me and who I loved instead of just masturbating in the shower to try and still feel human but it's better than laying down next to a heroin addict who wants to fuck one moment and tries to kill the next. Depression, PTSD, nightmares and pain are why I know I will never find true love a woman but I'm completely sober even the drugs all the Doc's wanted me to take just to see if something works since they always say this is forever and there's magic pill. One more day for Action Bastard and I'm gonna win this round too! Have a great day and happy hunting to all my Pangean radicals
5
Enjoy being online again!
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9 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.You should gather your resources the last few and move away from California come here it is very nice here.
PinkyandtheBrain
Level 7
Jan 31, 2019
0
I honestly believe you can find a partner one day..
But going by your posts, i would say NOW is not to time to be looking for it. You need to get your shit together first (i don't say that to be mean, just being honest)
Work on yourself first, the rest will come after that.. find friends not lovers, you future self will thank you.
hippydog
Level 8
Jan 29, 2019
2
Great advice.
First you have to find a way to love yourself before you can expect another to love you. I hope you are reaching out to professional help the way you are reaching out here. PTSD is nothing to try to deal with alone.
Mermaidfantasy
Level 7
Jan 29, 2019
1
It's not really something any doc can help you with. So far the best they can do is just give strong ass drugs that knock you out but they make your heart feel like shit
Venting - what you're doing here - is valuable. It lets you see reactions...let's you re-read what you're going through. Keep it up. Even if no one replies....it's good to post...
Here's a fabulous perspective from a very old and quite famous Agnostic;
Robecology
Level 9
Jan 29, 2019
1
Thanks dude I was just saying that to a moderater for this group that sends me private messages then tells me to tone it down cuz I answered honestly
@ActionBastard There sometimes is no difference between answering "honestly" and answering "profanely"....so I think they're suggesting to be honest...just find gentler "adjectives and adverbs"....if you know what I mean. Even your title...are you really always an "ActionBastard"? That sounds too rough to get next to....how about "actionDude" or 'ResultsMan"...just sayin'
@Robecology Action Bastard is the name of Shinchan's favorite super hero you retarded monkeys and I'm sure you guys won't get why I would say that either ???
@ActionBastard Shin Chan? Had to google it..
Many of the jokes in the series stem from Shin-chan's occasionally weird, unnatural and inappropriate use of language, as well as from his mischievous behaviour. Consequently, non-Japanese readers and viewers may find it difficult to understand his jokes. In fact, some of them cannot be translated into other languages.
...so...I guess you have to be in to obscure Japanese comic stories to "get it"....sorry....I'm very "out of the loop"
@Robecology dude all the cartoons were translated into english a hella long time ago for adult swim ?
@ActionBastard Man...I searched it and checked it out - for about a minute...awful stuff - IMO. It might work for you...does nothing for me. Thanks, but no thanks.
Your profile doesn't indicate any of this shit about you. Why is that?
Kojaksmom
Level 8
Jan 29, 2019
0
I just thought of posting what I feel yesterday and it feels awesome to do it. When I first started here I still had the delusion of finding love but now I'm just happy to make it another day
@ActionBastard it takes a ton of effort and communication to find real love. I think you really have to love another person for what they are not what they have.
You are the strength you need, be strong brother.
RU4me
Level 5
Jan 29, 2019
3
Thanks dude ?
@ActionBastard dude, I feel honored to read your honesty....keep your hair neat and shave close iron your clean shirts & pants....dance along your paths and go where single women your age go....maximize your chances....there are more women than men most age groups except newborns....odds are you are a good listener so ask her and listen and respect her mind not her titties... she will tell you when and where she wants to be kissed if she talks to you 2 or more days in a row...be positive be available and be honest you transparent with your romantic feelings
Be strong one day at a time and if necessary one minute at a time.
sbboudreau61
Level 5
Jan 29, 2019
1
This is actually helping a lot. There's so much shit you wanna say sometimes but the subjects are inappropriate for the people around you. Here I can say whatever my screwed up mind feels
@ActionBastard It’s not easy doing any type of relationship, good, bad or ugly! Good is always better. My wife/ex thinks we should stay married and live separated. I don’t think that’s going to work for me, control over me she will never have again.
@sbboudreau61 I'm gonna live with my wife after we divorce it'll keep me from fucking up with another lady. I miss being in love and having great sex but I'm too wild and I like saying that's retarded and fag and that's gay and watching the news and laughing my ass off at all the Jerry Springer shit these paparazzi types try to make us believe in the news
@ActionBastard within reason. Is it adding to group? Is it on topic? Is it about intimacy? relationships? getting closer to people you care about? Dating advice? Marriage advice?
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