Time Sensitive!
I need some advice!
I met a cute guy on Wednesday who seemed into me. I sent him an email asking if he wanted to go out with me on Sunday, my birthday. I received a limp answer 2 days later. Today I sent another email asking if he could tell me something definite. Still no answer. My birthday started 2 hours ago, and it will still be when I wake up Sunday morning.
Should I ...
Make other plans, I know too well that you can spend too much of life, important times in life, waiting on the auspices of others that tend to be all too infrequent. You deserve something to make you feel special in times like this even if it's self lead. I know it's hard not to wait on others to give us the wonderful boost that human contact can provide but it's important not to sacrifice too much of yourself waiting on it.
Happy birthday. Sounds like he isn't really interested in corresponding with you.
The guy is acting as evolution commanded, spreading his seeds wide and far and simply cannot fulfill all orders at the moments. Every guy goes through the cycles "feast and famine". He may be in a stage replace one of his friendships and it takes a little while shake up the yoke. In any case I would not hold my breath and keep looking. This is actually what we are doing the whole life. Unfortunately being a man I have shamefully admit that there are exponentially more good women then there are men. Men are such bastards. My wife is 36 years my junior and I am looking for a decade who would be worthy of her. I do not know a single guy. She is an introvert and she will never find anyone sitting home waiting for a good fairy bring one. We would set up the shop now so my family is disturbed as little as possible when the time come. No luck.
So my advice is: Keep looking and never ever take seriously what the guy will promise you in area of romance.
Not birthday date pressure on someone you just met.
Go have fun. But Sunday birthdays can suck in some states.
I had a similar scenario a few months ago. I met a woman at an open mic night (I sing and play a little guitar... we were both stealing glances for a while but one of us would look away when the other looked over. She walked by me at one point and we shared a glance... it was cool... I could tell there was mutual interest then... right before I was about to go up, we looked at each other and locked eyes from across the room for about 30 seconds... it was as though neither of us wanted to be the first one to look away... at that point my name got called and we both laughed... it was a cool shared moment, and the kind of look I hadn't experienced in years...
Well, I played a few songs... she came up and we talked... she's a piano player and we hit it off great... we talked and hung out for a while and then I had to leave because I had to work the next day. she asked for my phone and programmed her number into it and told me to text her the next day... I did... we texted a bit and set up a dinner date for the next week... Day before the date I texted just to make sure we were still on... No response... I waited for a while then as a last resort said... I guess dinner was a bad idea...
She said she had to work a double shift and was busy so we we reschedule to the next day... we texted back and forth for about a half hour and agreed to go the next day...
haven't heard from her since...
On the plus side... I learned a new term... Apparently I was ghosted. :/
It sucks... and I wish I could offer advise that would allow you to let go of it instantly... but it's likely nothing you did, and just their own issues that caused it... Still sucks, I know... but it's better to move on then to obsess about it.
Good Luck!
Also, Happy (I assume belated) Birthday!
Yeah, it would have been nice to have received an explanation, but we don't get to dictate what other people do, we can only try to do our best to be who we are and try to be decent to people. Oh well... Time moves on.
Well played, it's always best to tackle awkwardness with humor, and if nothing else, get the last laugh.
Happy Birthday and have a great day. It's all good. Your have his number which is a sign he it trying to break out of whatever shell he is in. A text here and there is friendship building. You can't assume what's happening in his world. Maybe he is just being cautious. Maybe he is a workaholic and busy most of the time. Maybe he is getting over a loss. Maybe he has ED and is fearful to date. Only time will tell so be patient.
Happy birthday! I agree with most everybody else. He probably is or was into you but it's possible you scared him off with the birthday invitation, or some guys just get scared off being asked out. You never know really.
I went out with a guy who I KNOW was really into me but I wanted to get our kids together (because at that time I was desperately trying to find activities and friends for my kid who was really struggling), and that totally freaked him out. Apparently he had introduced his kid to a girlfriend too early before and it was traumatic and he now had rules about that sort of thing - whereas I was just looking to set up a play date, I mean geez, we had only gone out on one date!
You don't always know what kind of baggage someone is bringing along to the date, lol. I'm just saying don't take it personally. But definitely move on.
I hope you have a marvelous birthday today! Do something wonderful for yourself. Take a walk in the park, get a pedicure or a massage, see a movie, curl up with a good book and a hot mocha, have a meal at your favorite restaurant (or all of the above!) Don't let idiots ruin your day. ???
sorry i missed your birthday, hoped it turned out ok. "he" was always gonna miss your birthday, all the signs were there
@Meta-Jen, in that case, have a truly scrumptious birthday
Anything is better than waiting for someone like that.
Rent & watch the movie, "He's Just Not Into You" and believe it!
That's a lot of pressure on someone new. Wrong tho it is this gives the impression of lower value, neediness. Never ever give this much power to affect you to someone new, ever. They haven't earned it.
Questions I'd be asking myself if put in this position "Hmmm, what do we do? Does this person not have anyone in their life? Why?"?
Tbh I might freeze and blow the whole thing so early & miss out on a great person, because the "dance" wasn't there.
What IF you got your wish & they ripped a mask of sorts off & are a monstery idiot? You've got THAT memory on your birthday!
You'd be risking your day with what is essentially a stranger.
You've already given this guy who hasn't put any time or effort in, sway over your happiness to have your "day".
I'm extremely quirky about my birthday. Like Larry David "Clear History" quirky. On one hand I hate celebrating it, or having the pressure to, otoh I do notice who doesn't say anything. /weird I know (my mother put a lot of pressure on my birthdays "I'm giving birth to you right now!" What do you wanna do on your day? Huh? huh? Huh? Wanna party? x 1,000,000, Oh & "you're popping out my vagina right now! " (uh thanks Mom!)? ! STFU!
/I HATE my phone blowing up on my birthday
With all that Happy Birthday! Do for you and don't push yourself too much.