Let it go you will probably suffer more in the end the longer you try and extract revenge plus i doubt it will help with your counseling as it will keep everything raw and in the moment for you

I am a little surprised that after all of that you still stayed. Obviously I don't know all of the details and in this respect, you are a better person than I am.

Tut tut - that's about a scathing as I can be for that. And I struggle to be THAT harsh!

@Cherie44 ... I realize this conversation was over a couple of days ago, but I wanted to reinforce the advice that you stop thinking about "her."

"She" probably isn't a at all. These scammers are very insidious and it is a profitable cottage industry in some parts of the world. Electronic photos and words too easily disguise the true identity of these people. The photos used to lure your husband have nothing to do with what the person on the other end actually looks like ... it was just the bait.

Good luck with the hard work you have to do to restore the trust and intimacy in your marriage. ❤

Be sure that you are reimbursed for half of that $800 in the divorce settlement. After agreed on amount, ask for an additional amount removed from his part to your part equal to the sum of any amount that he sent her.

It is emotional to want to seek revenge but logically you know it only hurts the seeker in the end. You are venting your rage at someone who is not responsible for the void in your union. Your spouse was seeking something that is absent & he sought it with someone who he felt filled that void. You must look inward, not outward at this failing which can with work, beome a victory in your own growth. I often fantasize "what I woulld do to so & so" but I don't follow thru. My vengence never manifests in action. That is for the cosmos to do. Believe me. A person such as she is not a happy one. Don't be her. Look at your own deficits & fix yourself. That bis the only person on the planet that you can fix. Good luck.

You would never have known about her if your husband hadn't communicated with her.

I would have left him.

The ONLY way to retain your sanity is through closure. The way to achieve that is to rule a line under that, declare that `chapter' in your life to be over, accept that whatever "evil" is done to you is contagious -so you must protect yourself or it will destroy you!

Left to fester, and fuelled by your anger, it surely will! You can reinforce your resolve by the realisation that your anger and indignation, righteous or not, -all that negative energy, is reflecting back inwards on you, and actually causing more grief and stress to YOU, than to HER!

So in your hatred, you are handing the victory to her! SHE has won! Do NOT let that happen! Stiffen your resolve! Show her that you are stronger than her, that she cannot destroy you, for you are impervious to her worst manipulations, you are a bigger-person than she'll ever be, you are your own woman, and your mind is strong!

I would check with the police, or a lawyer. She may be breaking a law. There are a lot of obscure laws, especially in the area of wirefraud.
Don't mess with her anymore. You may weaken or destroy your case against her.

I know it's hard, but don't stoop to her level. She isn't worth the f*cks you give. The longer you follow her, the longer it will take to move past this...and if you want to heal your marriage, at some point you will have to move past it and let it go.

She sounds like a truly despicable person. I'm sorry your spouse got sucked into her trap...but remember, cons are very good at what they do. Someday she will meet her match and when it happens, she more than has it coming.

Hang in there!!