Agnostic.com
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I haven't been here for awhile,however, I have much on my mind.I recently had a person express the opinion that I talked far too much about my late partner,(she has been gone since Aug. 2018). This gave me pause to consider that maybe I had been, and,maybe I should let go. That promises to be a daunting proposition,and,will be challenging,but,I will give it a go.☹

WayneDalton 8 Oct 21
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0

That is tough for me being a widower to say. There are so many things that I did or learned from my late wife over 30 years. Sometimes I think divorces have it easier, then I read their profiles. I think of it like losing a leg. Sure, you are going to heal, but you will probably still limp forever.

Fartwink Level 5 Dec 26, 2020
2

If someone told me I talked about him too much, I don't think that person would stay in my life after. I will always keep his memory with me and with our children. He may not be alive but he is still their . My love for him hasn't diminished. Should I date again, that person will have to be damn comfortable with themselves. They will need to understand that I have room in my heart for more love but I will still always love him. It just is.

JustMe1005 Level 3 Dec 23, 2020
2

Or, maybe find a partner that is understanding of your loss, and wants to know everything about you, including her.

That's what single and divorced people do not understand about the widow/er ... we've lived entire lives.

No, you should never be made to feel as if you need to be quiet about anyone or anything in your life. If they make you feel that way, find someone else.

My condolences on your loss.

Blessings.

3

Don't let somebody else set the timetable for your healing.

3

Letting go is the goal but it takes longer for some than others. The death of your partner was a tragic event that is still going on with you. A true friend will be interested in what is going on with you and will sympathize. It would be helpful if your friend provided you with distractions like lunches out or day trips. Anything fun.

dare2dream Level 7 Oct 22, 2020
3

I lost my mom and dad 20 years ago and I still think about them, and miss them, and talk about and nobody is going to tell me that I shouldn't.. Or that I should let it go.. They are part of me.. So you hold on to the love and memories all you want... ☺

Thank you for your kind words

6

Everybody gets over any loss in their own way & time...that person was Wrong to tell you that!

AnneWimsey Level 9 Oct 21, 2020
4

Wayne, I totally agree with everyone else's views: move at your own pace. Grief affects every aspect of everything we do, and it takes a very long time to get through it all. What we're often faced with are people who are (lucky for them) unfamiliar with this type of loss and either equate it to the loss of a spouse through divorce, or believe it should follow a 5-step program they read about. But it's unique to each of us.

Lauren Level 8 Oct 21, 2020
5

Wayne you do what's right for you. Don't let anyone tell you any different. They don't know how you feel. After years with the same person we have memories of them. They were a major part of our lives and still are. In our memories.

freeofgod Level 8 Oct 21, 2020
7

Move at your own pace. Healing from the loss of someone you love is different for everyone. ❤️

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