No one should shame another person for their sexual experiences. Sounds like she’s pretty repressed, probably good to be rid of her

Good freaking grief, she asked you to open up, and then she punished you. Oh gawd, red flags all over the place. She is not a person to ever be open with, she will punish you. I"m sorry, she used you to make herself feel righteous. No one should be judged for 20 years in the past. Can you imagine what other "tests" she would have for you down the line? Consider it bullet dodged. I think maybe you hit too close to some of her fantasies...

She's a manipulator.. That's entrapment.. You were willing to accommodate her and she flipped it on you.. She's morally bankrupt..
Say hallelujah, Ra' men and move on

No. You were honest with her and most importantly honest with yourself. If this person wants to "test" people from past actions that is both irresponsible and immature. You are better off without this person. She was wrong to treat you that way. If she wants to test people so bad she should become a proctor. I'm personally tired of women and their games. I'm sorry this happened to you. BTW. I am aware all women are not the same. Please do not attack me from last statement.

You invested emotion in a charlatan. Your hopes were raised by someone who led you on. Such is the scene currently. Many of us have experienced the same tho us women have to contend with creeps lurking in internetland. I feel for your disappointment but be happy you escaped her (?) with your life intact. She could have been playing you for nefarious reasons....most likely. She revealed her true self. And you got her to reveal her true self. Rejoice in your escape.

Sounds like you paid the price of being honest with a dishonest person. Instead of feeling dirty, you should feel relieved that you dodged a bullet in avoiding getting further involved with her.

no similar experience here, but she is a loser. consider yourself lucky to be free of her.

This is a familiar situation for me. Not the youthful dalliances, but being "tested". The resulting feeling I remember is that of being shamed. Not ashamed, but slapped, demeaned, betrayed, punished. This is the kind of experience that has rendered me shell-shocked when it comes to dating.

I don't have any advice for you to recover from this experience. I'm only able to commiserate.

No you should not! It is not like any of us can go back and undo the past, you were open and honest with her about your past, which is a positive thing in any relationship. This is all on her for judging you. If she did not want to get involved with someone who has an adventurous sexual past she should of been open and honest about that in the first place, like maybe in her profile. Her so called test, is what was dishonest and Immoral. From what you stated here, I got that you were over that part of your life, but because she showed an interest in it ( for herself) and you not wanting to deprive or judge such an interest you stated that if this was what "she" wanted, you would go there again, maybe, but with long talks first, knowing what turmoil it can cause in a relationship. That was a trap, not a test.

The woman seems to have issues! I agree that you are lucky she is gone.

I don't think this was an issue of "too much, too soon." This woman goes out of her way to "test" people, and I don't think it has anything to do with weeding out those she finds unsuitable; she enjoys the process, setting guys up to think there's a connection only to pull the rug out from under them. I suspect that even had you been the most vanilla guy on the planet, she'd have found a way to build the semblance of compatibility just to tear it down a couple of conversations later. Although she says she was testing you, she didn't realize that she inadvertently set up a damning test for herself that she ultimately failed. While you were forthright about your sexual history, as people should be when entering into a new relationship, she revealed herself to be dishonest about her intentions and manipulative, not to mention ostensibly judgmental and moralistic. Good riddance!

You have had a lucky escape...she is a "mousetrapper".....drawing you in & then using your honest sharing to play "Gotcha"! Just nasty!

No you did ,right,she asked,you came out in the open which has to be respected and in the future would not be hiding anything ,she seems to be the one with the moral problems

My guess is she was testing you if you were willing to proceed with the conversations, if she could entice you more with her photos, videos and ultimately ask you to go an URL and click somewhere to subscribe. Usually that is the game. Often these are men doing these scams. Once she found out that you are not easily led into more conversations and started "resisting", she decided to quit while blaming you.. Any one who is genuinely interested would not jump on WhatsApp unless you have met and are comfortable with each other.

However, I recommend you continue with your dalliances. I see no reason to stop.

Count yourself fortunate. It's fine for someone to try and find out about you, and while her method doesn't seem optimal to me, it works for her. And in this case, for you as well. You were honest, and cut off any losses up front.

Move on and enjoy.

Absolutely not....what's past is supposed to be left in the past. You actually gave her the perfect response when you acknowledged that such past behavior might not be conducive to a healthy relationship going forward. It should have been a clear indication where your head/heart is today. That whole "I was testing you" thing.......total BS. IMHO

Welcome to agnosticism, atheism or whatever. Her using "morally bankrupt" is IMO key to her beliefs as religious, whether she attends church or not. Morals usually come with hypocrisy, but ethics are rational. IDK what you did 20 years ago, but IMO if you didn't hurt anyone, i.e., leave scars, either economic, psychological or physical, or kill someone, you weren't unethical. In which case, you shouldn't feel you did anything wrong. If you did leave scars or worse, then whether your actions were/weren't ethical is complicated. (I'm not pumping you to tell me). If you feel they weren't ethical, you fessed up to her and she didn't pass your test. Based on your post, my guess is you don't feel bad about what you did, but she did.

Consequently, you and she have different standards, and she felt they were too great to reconcile. Better to split now, rather than trying for years to mix oil and water. I know, reason doesn't heal bruises; it takes time to heal. Finding someone you can accommodate in your life is difficult, but finding a soulmate is damn near impossible. Dating is sweet and sour. Good luck.

Sounds like a mind game. You never met her in person, right? Could she (?) just be a troll?

Scammer or idiot

I'm exhausted, so to put it simply, she sounds like a crazy bitch. I think you dodged a bullet and you didn't do anything wrong at all. Sorry she played head games with you.

@Green_Soldier71

What a sh!tty thing to do to someone! I'm sorry this happened to you.
It really is easier to be open and honest. No need for "games" or "testing". Seriously, we're not teenie boppers who don't know what we want or how to communicate our needs. Life is hard enough... there's no need to be an a$$hat ... IMO.

Ugh. Sorry that happened. I agree you dodged a bullet. People can truly be awful sometimes. Makes it hard to open to others when you have people like that out there.