I find karaoke to be great....the DJ announces names, you do not need to sing, ever, everybody needs an audience, and appreciates a compliment or kind word after singing, so it is easy to strike up a conversation without using tired "lines". In addition, you tend to see the same faces wherever you go, so always someplace to sit, exchange pleasantries. So much nicer than just hanging out at a bar!

Know how you feel same here shame you are nice

I would give up too, but I don't know any other path toward emotional and physical intimacy. But I guess if those were necessary for life, I'd be dead already.

@bobwjr Agree with Bob, I'd want to meet you if you lived near me. Geo is everything.....

I also find that with online dating. At the click of a button people seem to have an unlimited amount of other people to choose from . Having a relationship and getting to know one another takes time and the in our immediate gratification Society that seems to be too much to ask.

I totally agree. We see too much Hollywood perfection and then think we should be able to find that in our backyard. But it's all smoke and mirrors. There are things worth being deal breakers, but too often it's the insignificant stuff that keeps people apart.

"'The One' doesn't exist; there's just a 0.67 that you round up to 'The One.'"
— Dan Savage

""Oh, you have a tiny flaw or like something I don't or don't want to get close on the first date? Next!"
Yes, that's about it. I've tried Tinder and of the very few matches I got it only took a short interaction for them to unmatched me. A few made it clear that I was not a "perfect" match and a few disappeared after I revealed I was an atheist. Pretty much left me saying to hell with the whole thing.

@Kojaksmom I think both you and Remi are right on the money. Both genders treat online dating too much like shopping, which I have griped about before on these boards. It's too much of using a rigid checklist when going thru the choices on the screen and swiping away from anyone that doesn't fit every box on the checklist. You then miss out on some flawed, but very compatible people if you gave them the chance to actually meet you in person and show off their character, humor, charisma, and heart that are never going to show thru in their profile or even their pics.

Friendship is the key. Every lasting relationship I've ever been in was dependent upon that.

That's how I prefer it, too. More comfortable because there is knowledge up front; minimizing the guessing games. Also... one knows more about someone than just their looks.

That's nice for you, but once I'm assigned to the "friend zone" it's impossible to get out. In fact, the entirety of my dating/matchmaking efforts in the past decade can be summarized as: a lot of new friends.

LOL. Better insure yourself before you use the viagra

@freeofgod My point exactly!

I can totally relate to that!

If men my age aren't barf-on-your-shoes-ugly, in need of a nurse, poor as dirt, or mental nightmares, they are looking for women twenty years younger than me.

@Deb57 Heh!!! I'm wondering which of your categories I would be in. Too bad you are so far away.

I think you are very attractive, you strongly resemble one of my future ex-wifes.

@Deb57 That is for sure.

@Deb57 Wait a minute, Deb, I resemble that remark, lol. We've chatted before thru PMs and I have said I would try dating you in a heartbeat if we lived near each other. So which of those groups do I fall into, since I really want someone who is my age and own level?

@TomMcGiverin Haha! You're just too far away!

@Normanbites your comment was cute so I checked out your profile. Are you the dog or the blurry green guy?

@Deb57 It depends on the body wash I've been using.

@Deb57 Care to translate or explain the type of ugly you are talking about? Maybe the two hillbilly rapists from Deliverance-ugly?

@TomMcGiverin Quasimodo needs a shave ugly.

@Deb57 That is pretty extreme, lol! Where are you encountering such ugly men, may I ask? Not here on Agnostic, I don't imagine.....On regular paid sites like Match? And as far as looking only for women who are 20 years younger than them, they'd better be rich as Trump or look like Richard Gere if they want to pull that off with anyone above average looks at that age.

I'm curious. If all your prefious interactions with him were so lively and promising, what was different about him in person that torpedoed all that?

So sad you are nice

@ElusiveMoby Video calls? VERY important before a long trip! Better yet, video phone sex... not kidding in the least... worked very well for moi. Comic Relief: I ruined a $60. Android phone from steam from mutual showers w a girlfriend in Sweden... yes, it was worth it, haha! @ThomasLevy

My local senior center is the same way. They are all conservative Christians, hicks, and rubes. Almost none of the college educated and when they do their pledge of allegiance thing I do a silent protest of remaining seated and drinking my coffee. I kind of enjoy pissing them off because they can't do anything to make me go along with their rituals of that and prayer. I just go there, sit by myself, and get my free lunch about six times a month. I have told the site director that I already have friends and am there to eat, not socialize. They are also at least a dozen years or more older than me too.

This is going to sound terrible and I apologize in advance. The senior center in my county is full of people who probably should be in assisted living and quite possibly are. Most were there with their caretakers or drivers and the others seemed like really old. Not to say that I'm not really old, but I don't need a cane or walker to get around and I don't weigh 250 pounds.

@SonnyBubba on the other hand, there are chippy volunteers runnig around AND you only need to find one person in that sea of people!

@AnneWimsey Actually the only things running around close to me are bears, deer, and turkeys (the gobbling kind), but I like all of them. I'm just not brave enough to lay down with any of them.

Precisely why I'm done. The search proved fruitless and exhausting.
It's no longer worth my time or effort.

Yes x3

If you asked my 11 year old daughter how I felt about people she would tell you I hate everybody. Not true! but very close.

Wasn't all that wonderful in the previous century.

I remember signing on a dating site only to find mostly fake profiles or profiles that had been abandoned. Repeating themes included a desire to travel, "fiscal stable" and walking on the beach. Looking at the profiles in here, that's no longer common. Like today, they were almost all too far away to date.

Gals I did find told me most of the selfies were guys in skimpy swim suits and were painfully blount (want to fuck?). That's no longer the rule in here.

Isn't this pretty normal for someone who is describing something and how it affects him? His wants, desires, experiences, etc?

@RiverRick Well, 4 of 5 "likes" of my comment above are from the ornery, independent, American women he is dealing with, so you tell me... This isn't Asia, Africa or the Middle East. Gotta walk a diplomatic tightrope over flaming coals for quality nooky here, haha! Tease 'em... Please 'em... Make 'em laugh... Stimulate their minds... make women feel special first, then make your personal desires known.

Well said. LD dating puts a lot of pressure on both people during the early phase, whether they admit it or not, with all the time and money invested. It's also a bigger emotional investment than nearby dating if the relationship doesn't pan out. For both reasons, I won't date LD because it also would take me away from my local friends more too....

@Bierbasstard that's lovely! And thank you. I hope it does too.

Been there done that, I used to live is a small rural NC town

@ThomasLevi I still do. Near Charlotte, back in my hometown now. East Kudzu, lol.

@CarolinaGirl60 I lives in Salisbury, Before that I lived-in Winston Salem and worked in Rural, well Rural Hall but it was pretty damn rural.

I have tried most of those IRL avenues to meet women and they don't work, at least for me in my area. Haven't tried coaching youth sports partly because at my age the single moms of the kids would be too young for me and I would be more the age of the kids grandmas, who I would only meet at competitions of the kids. Be too busy then to socialize.

@TomMcGiverin Aim young. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

@resserts I quit doing that after seeing on the dating site Match how almost no women younger than 55 were willing to date someone who is 60 like me. In fact, lots of women even 55 won't date someone five years older. They would rather play cougar and date someone as much as 15 years younger, at least based on what I see in the Match profiles listing their dating range for ages. Most of those women in their 50s seem determined to catch up to what men have been doing for decades in dating as far as dating way younger.....

@TomMcGiverin I'm no cougar but I've noticed that it is so widespread, that it's often assumed I am one.

I would actually prefer someone my age or a bit older as long as they were able to go hiking and such but I look younger than I am so the men I would want to date ignore me

Or maybe I'm just hideous and in denial about it LOL

I go to plays concerts, creative writing class, a writing group, library programs, movies, take my horse to riding clinics, and lots of other stuff. I am happy, busy, and enjoy life, but I never meet any men my age. I meet younger men that I have friendships with, but,no one to date. It's ok. I am not lonely, I don't want to get married again or even live with someone. If I ever met a man that I liked, enjoyed, had a lot in common with, and he felt the same way about me, that would be nice, but not something that I need.I certainly recommend getting involved in outside activities though. It is fun.

Its obviously not an issue for you.

Hey man go to asia, there you can find all of types of women or ladyboys easily.

@Williamcristiano You can keep your ladyboys to yourself please.