What choice do children have in such events....part of growing up is exercising the power to say no

Unless there is a gun to your head, no one forces you to do anything.

Not any longer.

Funny you should mention it. I was just invited to a pool party given by one of my dance community friends. He's only inviting a dozen or so people and I do NOT want to go, I just want to go dancing. I don't even know this group that well. They'll be hanging out and schmoozing and drinking til all hours of the morning. How do I get out of this without being rude? I always feel a little trapped in these kinds of situations. It's not one of those things where I can drop by for 10 minutes to make an appearance. Social angst! Argggghhhh.

Anybody? Anybody? Buehler?

Only every event. I debated even attending my own wedding. It ended up being fine, but damn was I anxious for months beforehand.

I go long enough to show the flag then get the hell out of Dodge. I once left a bachelor party in less than 10 minutes. Didn't even wait for the introductions- I don't drink, I don't smoke, I'm a vegetarian and I'm gone.