Actually he never got any bruises on my lower legs. I usually had them on my neck, upper arms, back, hips and thighs. I had one black eye, bruised cheeks, an arm in a sling for six weeks when he twisted it, clothes ripped, multiple sexual assaults, treasured items broken, food thrown at me and a gun held to my head. He once sprayed oven cleaner on his arm, as it bubbled on his skin, he said it would go on my face if I tried to leave him.When the law changed that police had to arrest if there were clear signs of domestic abuse, he started with body slamming because it hurt like hell and never left a mark.

I think this meme is funny because I follow several domestic abuse topics on Instagram and Facebook and people keep saying stupid shit like god saved them. Nope, technology saved me because I got it on video whereas he always had a lie ready when the cops showed up. I have him on video saying he told the cops I had threatened to harm the children which is why they let him leave and take my kids after the gun incident. I wondered for years how that happened and he just blurted it out to taunt me. Judge did not like that at the hearing!

Smartphone got me a restraining order and FINALLY a divorce. Thanks, Apple!

@Killtheskyfairy Eek! Thanks for sharing all that. I cannot understand what drives mental defectives to be so dangerous towards other people. I am delighted that you escaped what might be termed "a hell on earth".

You’d think but sometimes you get body slammed or knocked into a wall and it just stuns so you can’t fight back. I keep thinking I should have killed him when he was stalking me when I was 19. He’d have been dead and I would have only lost a few years in prison rather than decades.

@Killtheskyfairy back in the good old days, killing even a Very abusive husband could get you life,especially in tbe South.

@Killtheskyfairy You need a what I call an "equalizer". Baseball bats are a good choice. I only had to use it once on a wall to convince him to back off or..... I am so sorry for your experience. I was raised to defend myself.

@Mooolah oh I was raised with three brothers so I tried that. That got me the black eye. Also hard to defend yourself when guy is taller and twice your weight. I would get bodyslammed out of nowhere which knocked the wind out of me and then he’d kneel on my shoulders.

He also told me he’d kill me if I left and he had stalked me before we were married and wouldn’t take no for an answer so I knew how relentless he was. He’d throw rocks at my window and lay on the doorbell. He got a key made of my apartment door (stolen out of my purse) and would sneak in in the middle of the night. I had to put couch in front of the door between it and the half wall to keep him out so don’t think there was no resistance.

@Killtheskyfairy How did you escape his madness? I am relieved that you did.

@Mooolah finally got laws to protect women, cell phones with cameras and moved near a Center for Prevention of Abuse. I got him on film, got him arrested, got a restraining order and a divorce.

@Killtheskyfairy Bravo! I was one of the 1st people to help form a women's shelter for the battered. I couldn't believe there was no safe place to flee. I became very active in the movements for justice & I am rewarded knowing that it helped you. Once upon a time, men where told to beat their wife at least once a week. 'Ya hadda let 'em heal in order to cook or it would have been more frequent.

@Mooolah yes, I also didn’t realize I was living in an abusive relationship because it is normalized like that in society. I once clawed my husband’s face because he was choking me. His father saw the scratches and asked about it. I told my father in law about the choking and the defensive action on my part and he said to my husband, “you shouldn’t let her do that! “ Next time hubby tried to choke me, he knelt on my upper arms so I couldn’t scratch him.

@Killtheskyfairy Next time I choke somebody I will remember to do that. Thanks "dad-in-law' for the advise.

@Mooolah so I didn’t realize this wasn’t normal until I became a CASA volunteer and went to a seminar on how to spot domestic abuse in the home. About midway through training, I burst into tears and ran from the room. I took some time to compose myself and went back. Trainer said that happens at every training she gives. At least one and usually more women recognize themselves as abused.

@Killtheskyfairy A childhood friend of mine said she was abused because he called her a bitch. Not an insult in my world. A prelude perhaps to a future escalation. But when compared to stuff I witnessed, she used that word loosely. I wonder if your spouse had any head injuries. Frontal cortex brain trauma is often associated with rage control & depression.

@Mooolah oh please. He could control his anger just fine. He wasn’t picking fights with men of his own size and never had trouble at work so don’t try making excuses for him. He was your typical abusive man who did it to rule the roost. The only one he beat was me and the only property he destroyed was mine. The abuse was to get preferential treatment and not have to do his fair share of work.

By the time I got divorced, beside going to work and doing woodworking projects he enjoyed, he did absolutely nothing in the house. If I asked for help, I was bitching. I once made a list of stuff I needed to get done before winter and he found it and started screaming about my honey do list. My answer was, since when have I asked you to do any of that stuff? Decades???

@Killtheskyfairy Not making excuses, hardly. It is the responsibility of everyone to learn to control their impulses, even if it means seeking help to do just that. He was responsible for his actions. No one else. If this was not an impulse control issue, what makes someone choose to harm others? The eternal question. Is evil genetic, brain disfunction, choice, imprinting, testosterone over load? I know that it isn't the devil.

@Mooolah I told you why he did it and why most men do it. This is the best book that explains it: [amazon.com]

@Killtheskyfairy Just ordered it. Thanks.