One day, in an old west town, the citizens were all fleeing for the hills while shouting "Big John's coming!" A stranger was headed for the saloon, wondering what all the uproar was about, and found the place all but deserted. Just as he walked up to the bar, this huge wild eyed guy, at least seven feet tall, tore the batwing doors loose and threw them halfway across the street. He had a live, yowling wildcat draped around his neck, barbed wire wrapped around each massive fist, and a rattlesnake in one hand. The floor shook as he went over, pounded on the bar, and roared for the saloon keeper to give him a bottle of rotgut right effing now. The stranger stood by, wondering what to make of it, as the guy picked up a heavy table and threw it at the mirror, roaring again about the bottle. The stranger somehow found his voice and asked, "Um . . . You seem to be in an awful hurry." The guy looked at him and said, "Are you kidding? I've got to get the hell out of town! Big John's coming!"