zeuser's Profile

Saving a buck or two on encryption software.

Betty comments on Jul 4, 2024:

Glenn got to it first but I will still say the slinky lift is hilarious. It would have simplified running up and down the stairs. 😁 Thanks for the chuckles, Z. :)

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

You're welcome!

Saving a buck or two on encryption software.

EricJones comments on Jul 4, 2024:

These are really good.

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

Thanks, man!

Us boomers can remember this type of shit.

glennlab comments on Jul 4, 2024:

I remember when the EPA first announced the Superfund cleanup sites, and realized i had been swimming in 6 of them.

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

Ouch! My ex wife did remediation on several of those sites. They were naaaaasty.

Saving a buck or two on encryption software.

glennlab comments on Jul 4, 2024:

slinky lift, lol

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

Yeah, I liked that one too!

Just in time for the fourth.

silverotter11 comments on Jul 3, 2024:

The French really nailed it!

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

@silverotter11 Our proud boys are probably better armed.

Just in time for the fourth.

silverotter11 comments on Jul 3, 2024:

The French really nailed it!

zeuser replies on Jul 4, 2024:

They are having some wingnut Nazi problems of their own. But the guy who drew this certainly gets it.

It all depends on how you pose your model...

Betty comments on Jul 3, 2024:

Good advice about e-mail. I dance when no one is watching. 😂 Fun set, Z. You made me chuckle. Thanks. :)

zeuser replies on Jul 3, 2024:

Good.You're welcome!

Just in time for the fourth.

ThinkingFree comments on Jul 3, 2024:

Really profound, Z !!

zeuser replies on Jul 3, 2024:

It's pretty obvious. You have to have a belly full of kool-aid not to see it.

True, but I can also make the font bigger so I can read the damn thing.

silverotter11 comments on Jul 2, 2024:

As advertised! Just for laughs, very corny tho. lol Thanks Z

zeuser replies on Jul 2, 2024:

Geez, everybody is a critic. 😉

True, but I can also make the font bigger so I can read the damn thing.

Betty comments on Jul 2, 2024:

Interesting set, Z. Thanks for sharing. :)

zeuser replies on Jul 2, 2024:

You're welcome!

From the Philadelphia Inquirer Biden had a horrible night Thursday.

zeuser comments on Jun 30, 2024:

I was very proud of the Inquirer for having the stones to put this out there. They are the only newspaper I subscribe to (digitally, but still), and I'm happy they are robustly true blue. Plus, I gotta follow the Phillies! 💙

zeuser replies on Jul 1, 2024:

@silverotter11 That is a damn shame. I completely understand, but still.

I'd love to see how one holds the paintbrush.

Betty comments on Jul 1, 2024:

When the doors won't open...there's always the window. ;) Another fun set, Z. Thanks. :)

zeuser replies on Jul 1, 2024:

You're welcome!

Finally some good news

zeuser comments on Jul 1, 2024:

He's in the clink right now. He should have a fat cellmate with orange skin and a wig, if you ask me.

zeuser replies on Jul 1, 2024:

@Betty Yeah, that guy.

From the Philadelphia Inquirer Biden had a horrible night Thursday.

zeuser comments on Jun 30, 2024:

I was very proud of the Inquirer for having the stones to put this out there. They are the only newspaper I subscribe to (digitally, but still), and I'm happy they are robustly true blue. Plus, I gotta follow the Phillies! 💙

zeuser replies on Jul 1, 2024:

@silverotter11 I lived at 22nd and Walnut for 2 years while I was a grad student at Penn, right next to the Schuykill river. I get homesick when I read articles about the 10 best Cheesesteak places or the best pizza spots in town. I have a friend in Delaware who I visit every so often, so I get to make it back every couple of years. I love the Inquirer. 💙

What? What?

Betty comments on Jun 30, 2024:

Hyenas...lol, lol, lol...😂 What...When...Who...Hoo! 😂 Fun set, Z. Thanks. :) I like the new avatar. You look good when you smile. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 30, 2024:

@ThinkingFree Thanks, hon. Also thanks for the message. I tried to message back, but it stopped working again. 💜

What? What?

Betty comments on Jun 30, 2024:

Hyenas...lol, lol, lol...😂 What...When...Who...Hoo! 😂 Fun set, Z. Thanks. :) I like the new avatar. You look good when you smile. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 30, 2024:

Thanks. I try to get a different current shot each season.

Yeah, that's him all right.

Betty comments on Jun 30, 2024:

That would be a funny thing to see. 😂

zeuser replies on Jun 30, 2024:

Yeah, right up until the gag reflex kicked in. 🤣

He just murdered his dissertation.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 30, 2024:

LOL! Lots of grins but Hagrid made me LOL. For me it's sorta true. lol

zeuser replies on Jun 30, 2024:

Lots of people death scroll on youtube, tiktok, instgram reels, and just facebook. It's an issue.

He just murdered his dissertation.

Betty comments on Jun 29, 2024:

More smirking than giggles. Good set, Z. Thank you. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 29, 2024:

You're welcome. Sometimes, that's all you can find. Smirking is underrated anyway.

Lead with that, Uncle Joe! I've got crunchy cheetos, caramel corn, and pinot grigio in the fridge.

Theresa_N comments on Jun 28, 2024:

So who'll replace Joe?

zeuser replies on Jun 28, 2024:

Four options. 1 - Nobody. Joe sticks it out. 2 - A popular Democrat, governor or congressman. Someone like Gretchen Whitmer, Gavin Newsom, Hakeem Jeffries. 3 - Kamala. 4 - A non-politician, Jon Stewart for example. Who knows? If he does drop out, my money is on option 2.

We got you covered! Includes a coupon good for 10 percent off Huggies or plungers, depending.

Betty comments on Jun 27, 2024:

You need a B on that oink. ;) Another fine set, Z. Thanks, I love to chuckle. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 27, 2024:

Sure thing!

Societal change starts with workplace change.

zeuser comments on Jun 27, 2024:

I'm a union guy from way back, and I am thrilled this is finally turning around.

zeuser replies on Jun 27, 2024:

@glennlab I was in the pipefitters union for a summer job at my dad's air conditioner factory (I actually built packing crates), and the UMW for a summer job at my mom's boot factory (I glued soles on boots, god what a shitty job). They wanted to incentivize me to study seriously - which I did. However, respect for solidarity stayed with me!

We got you covered! Includes a coupon good for 10 percent off Huggies or plungers, depending.

glennlab comments on Jun 27, 2024:

I see you caught me at Costco.

zeuser replies on Jun 27, 2024:

I'm happy it was after your blue period.

This explains why I've been telling more and more cheesy jokes...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 26, 2024:

Somebody needs to play that at Trump's sentencing...

zeuser replies on Jun 26, 2024:

Followed by "na na na na na na na na hey hey hey goodbye".

This explains why I've been telling more and more cheesy jokes...

glennlab comments on Jun 26, 2024:

Non violence can work.

zeuser replies on Jun 26, 2024:

I'd certainly negotiate in that circumstance.

This explains why I've been telling more and more cheesy jokes...

Betty comments on Jun 26, 2024:

Old cheese. 😍 Hopefully not the smelly ones. ;) You did good, Z. Thanks for another set of chuckles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 26, 2024:

You're welcome! Ya know, some smells are an acquired taste. ;)

Adaptation is the key to survival.

glennlab comments on Jun 25, 2024:

I saw bacon and got ready to respond in kind, shucks false alarm.

zeuser replies on Jun 25, 2024:

@glennlab @Betty I'm a kielbasa and pierogi guy m'self, but I do have a soft spot for bacon. 😜

Adaptation is the key to survival.

glennlab comments on Jun 25, 2024:

I saw bacon and got ready to respond in kind, shucks false alarm.

zeuser replies on Jun 25, 2024:

I thought you guys only felt this way about crawfish. Bacon counts, though.

Adaptation is the key to survival.

Betty comments on Jun 25, 2024:

Thanks, Z for another fun set. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 25, 2024:

You're welcome!

The following might make the men in the audience cringe a bit. Donde es schlongo?

SpikeTalon comments on Jun 24, 2024:

1,000 internet points awarded to whoever can guess who I was trying to imitate above. Think 1990s skits.

zeuser replies on Jun 24, 2024:

My guess would be Adam Sandler.

Now, for a limited time, 20 percent more per bottle!

Betty comments on Jun 24, 2024:

A nudist stuck in a suit. Oh! The horror! ;) Fun set, Z. Do it again. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 24, 2024:

Stay tuned!

Now, for a limited time, 20 percent more per bottle!

glennlab comments on Jun 24, 2024:

You're a repeat offender!

zeuser replies on Jun 24, 2024:

*You're* a repeat offender! LOL

Look how he mixes the reds with the blacks for spice! And that guy is a bird flu carrier if I ever ...

glennlab comments on Jun 23, 2024:

Nice family

zeuser replies on Jun 23, 2024:

Everybody is an earner, though.

Look how he mixes the reds with the blacks for spice! And that guy is a bird flu carrier if I ever ...

Betty comments on Jun 23, 2024:

You have picked some stellar ones, Z. That crown is getting closer and closer. 🤴. Thanks for the laughs. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 23, 2024:

You're welcome!

Been busy with work and family!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 22, 2024:

Looks more like the gene pool....

zeuser replies on Jun 23, 2024:

There is a correlation there.

When one of the designers of the decline complain, you know it has exceeded even their expectations,...

zeuser comments on Jun 22, 2024:

Mitch should be hung for treason. And not just him, either.

zeuser replies on Jun 22, 2024:

@pamagain I think father time is catching up with Mitch.

Well, she WAS under oath to tell the whole truth.

EricJones comments on Jun 22, 2024:

If all those exotic meats taste like chicken-just how do you know it's not chicken and the staff is pulling a fast one by telling you that it's some exotic food.

zeuser replies on Jun 22, 2024:

I guess you don't.

Well, she WAS under oath to tell the whole truth.

Betty comments on Jun 22, 2024:

The Beantles...🤣 That's a concert I would love to see. 😂 You really want that crown, don't you, Z. Great set, thanks for the chuckles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 22, 2024:

Your welcome!

Well, she WAS under oath to tell the whole truth.

glennlab comments on Jun 22, 2024:

Life saving prof, good one, nice set.

zeuser replies on Jun 22, 2024:

Thanks, man!

Hey, it worked for us boomers.

annewimsey500 comments on Jun 21, 2024:

Aaaahhh yeeeaaaasss the ol' "duck and cover". They herded us into the auditorium after lunch and showed us footage of the Arizona tests, then taught us D& C. Even at that age I was like, this Ain't gonna work.......

zeuser replies on Jun 22, 2024:

@annewimsey500 It's amazing we made it this far.

Hey, it worked for us boomers.

annewimsey500 comments on Jun 21, 2024:

Aaaahhh yeeeaaaasss the ol' "duck and cover". They herded us into the auditorium after lunch and showed us footage of the Arizona tests, then taught us D& C. Even at that age I was like, this Ain't gonna work.......

zeuser replies on Jun 21, 2024:

@annewimsey500 We had old school desks, like the pic, bolted to the floor. It was impossible even for kids to fit under these, so we went to the basement and ducked and covered there. The floors were wood and were oiled every year, so a big fire was a bigger threat than an A-bomb. After the school building was decommissioned, that's exactly what happened. You could see the fire for miles.

Hey, it worked for us boomers.

annewimsey500 comments on Jun 21, 2024:

Aaaahhh yeeeaaaasss the ol' "duck and cover". They herded us into the auditorium after lunch and showed us footage of the Arizona tests, then taught us D& C. Even at that age I was like, this Ain't gonna work.......

zeuser replies on Jun 21, 2024:

I think they meant it to be a psychological crutch for scared kids, but the smarter ones, like you Annie, could see right through that horseshit.

Hey, it worked for us boomers.

Betty comments on Jun 21, 2024:

Good set, Z. Thanks. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 21, 2024:

You're welcome!

Sweet potato.You want to put that one out to spud.

Betty comments on Jun 20, 2024:

You have outdone your self, Z. 😂 Thanks for the giggles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 20, 2024:

You're welcome!

Sweet potato.You want to put that one out to spud.

ThinkingFree comments on Jun 20, 2024:

Poor Gumby !! 😂 🤣 😅

zeuser replies on Jun 20, 2024:

That would take anyone back a step or two 😏

Sometimes, the pope hits on a good idea.

annewimsey500 comments on Jun 20, 2024:

Holy Cow the one on the right has the biggest outhouse I have ever seen! (And what all they be doin' in there?)

zeuser replies on Jun 20, 2024:

@annewimsey500 No doubt! LOL

Sometimes, the pope hits on a good idea.

annewimsey500 comments on Jun 20, 2024:

Holy Cow the one on the right has the biggest outhouse I have ever seen! (And what all they be doin' in there?)

zeuser replies on Jun 20, 2024:

When everybody is up to the brim full of shit, you need the infrastructure to handle it. 🤣

Fuzzy Wuzzy felt a little scuzzy.

Betty comments on Jun 19, 2024:

Many paws...🤣🤣🤣 That's one way to describe it. :) Thanks for the chuckles, Z. You've managed to keep your title once again. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 19, 2024:

Thank you!

In his own words, what religion means to him. Quite the scholar.

Mcfluwster comments on Jun 17, 2024:

By Gum he plunged his own depths very deeply to get that out! Trouble is his water was murkey.

zeuser replies on Jun 17, 2024:

@Mcfluwster Here is a hint: it's something a horse produces.

In his own words, what religion means to him. Quite the scholar.

HippieChick58 comments on Jun 17, 2024:

Another word soup from the orange one.

zeuser replies on Jun 17, 2024:

That's not soup either. LOL

In his own words, what religion means to him. Quite the scholar.

RobertNappi2 comments on Jun 17, 2024:

Gibbering idiot

zeuser replies on Jun 17, 2024:

Always sounds like he is giving a book report on a book he didn't read, trying to fake it and failing miserably.

In his own words, what religion means to him. Quite the scholar.

Mcfluwster comments on Jun 17, 2024:

By Gum he plunged his own depths very deeply to get that out! Trouble is his water was murkey.

zeuser replies on Jun 17, 2024:

That's not water. LOL

I need bottles from 12 bars...

Betty comments on Jun 17, 2024:

Would they be empty bottles? ;) Fun set, Z. Thanks. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 17, 2024:

They're for the baby blues! Glad you like them.

Brrr! Happy father's day, dads!

Betty comments on Jun 16, 2024:

Another good set, Z. Being so good at it, your hat size will need to be increased. ;) Thanks for the giggles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 16, 2024:

Sure thing. 😉

Brrr! Happy father's day, dads!

Ryo1 comments on Jun 16, 2024:

Interesting. It's Father's Day over here in the UK, too. (Mother's Day is in March.) It simply proves that Father's Day is commercialised.

zeuser replies on Jun 16, 2024:

Regardless, it means a lot to us dads.

So far, that seems to be pretty true.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 15, 2024:

Like the dollar one! LOL Excellent set Z!

zeuser replies on Jun 15, 2024:

Thanks, hon!

So far, that seems to be pretty true.

Betty comments on Jun 15, 2024:

Poor Cuckoo Bird is going cuckoo. 😂 Thanks for the chuckles, Z. You do yourself proud. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 15, 2024:

You're welcome!

So far, that seems to be pretty true.

ThinkingFree comments on Jun 15, 2024:

Yup, but fart just once !! 😂 🤣 😅 😆 😂 🤣 😅

zeuser replies on Jun 15, 2024:

They never forget.

Any more dumb questions?

Betty comments on Jun 14, 2024:

Were you peeking as I hopped around? ;) The road not taken can be quite scary. ;) Another fine set, Z. Thanks for the chuckles.

zeuser replies on Jun 14, 2024:

You're welcome!

Any more dumb questions?

Redheadedgammy comments on Jun 14, 2024:

That Walmart meat makes me glad I'm a vegetarian.... 🤣🤣🤣

zeuser replies on Jun 14, 2024:

If you buy meat at Wally world, you get what you deserve! LOL

Any more dumb questions?

silverotter11 comments on Jun 14, 2024:

LOL! The first one reminded me of the only job I was ever fired from. Moral among the crew was some of the worse I ever experienced. Upper management brought in a new supervisor and this other guy shows up as a coordinator. I was never clear on just what his job was but he'd have these meetings ...

zeuser replies on Jun 14, 2024:

Good story! My attitude was always "I was looking for a job when I found this one". Pony up or STFU.

Constantly trying to find the bottle of Tabasco in my cupboard and am never able to find it no ...

zeuser comments on Jun 13, 2024:

Every time I pull up to a pull-through spot in a parking lot, someone pulls through the other way before I get there.

zeuser replies on Jun 13, 2024:

@Betty This was a hypothetical. Of course they do. 😜

DA: Anything to add, Chuckles? Chuckles, pulling out bulb horn: HONK HONK

Betty comments on Jun 13, 2024:

The robots battery would probably die before I was through. 🥺 Fun set, Z. Giggles all round. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 13, 2024:

You HOTDOG!

Trump veep material? A weasel suckup with overtones of horseshit? So yes, yes he is.

michelle666gar comments on Jun 12, 2024:

What a dumb motherfucker! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

@michelle666gar I think both of the SC senators are playing for the other team. That's fine, unless and until it bleeds into their legislative agendas.

Trump veep material? A weasel suckup with overtones of horseshit? So yes, yes he is.

DenoPenno comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Maybe they want him coz he lies too much.

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

He's got some stiff competition in that case.

Trump veep material? A weasel suckup with overtones of horseshit? So yes, yes he is.

michelle666gar comments on Jun 12, 2024:

What a dumb motherfucker! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

You wonder why his, um, girlfriend doesn't tell him to knock it off. Oh, that's right....LOL

My mood lately! Lol [facebook.com]

zeuser comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Try to do something nice...😆

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

@michelle666gar An early happy birthday, sweetie! You have to make it a habit to ask if there is a senior discount, no matter where you are. I even ask the girl scouts when they sell cookies, but those little darlings always tell me NO. LOL

My mood lately! Lol [facebook.com]

zeuser comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Try to do something nice...😆

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

@michelle666gar Get it all out hon,, this is your safe space.

If y'all can access the series "Cunk on Earth", watch it! 'Philomena Cunk' is played by British ...

KateOahu comments on Jun 12, 2024:

I am usually very fond of British humor, but found the first fifteen minutes unbearably stupid. Maybe I’ll try to go back another time, but that was as much as I could stand for one day.

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

Humor is subjective. No worries.

Hey phone makers, you know where you can stick it.

Betty comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Monkey bars. Directions please. ;) I definitely do not want to choke an alligator. 😲 Funny set, Z. More, more, more. ;) Thank you for the giggles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

@Betty Maybe.

Hey phone makers, you know where you can stick it.

michelle666gar comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Great set Z!!!

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

Thanks, MG!

Hey phone makers, you know where you can stick it.

Redheadedgammy comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Do you know how many adapter cords I still have?? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

I've got some from my dialup modem days. The struggle is real.

Hey phone makers, you know where you can stick it.

Betty comments on Jun 12, 2024:

Monkey bars. Directions please. ;) I definitely do not want to choke an alligator. 😲 Funny set, Z. More, more, more. ;) Thank you for the giggles. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 12, 2024:

Follow the trail of banana peels. ;) Thanks, Betty.

Can be an issue if you have bags under your eyes...

Betty comments on Jun 11, 2024:

Blue screen of death. Been there and swore a lot. ;) Free spirit does sound classier. 😁 The master has struck again. Thank you, Z. Chuckles all round. :)

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

You're welcome!

While sitting in marathon group meetings while I was still trapped in the corporate job cycle, we ...

Betty comments on Jun 11, 2024:

I guess anyone with a weak bladder is out of luck. ;)

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

This explains why streaming is so popular, you can pause and pee.

Deny the crime, elect the convict.

glennlab comments on Jun 11, 2024:

I've removed the paywall on this https://www.nytimes.com/2024/06/09/opinion/presbyterian-church-evangelical-canceled.html?unlocked_article_code=1.y00.73o_.aBV6dHdQkkmY=url-share The churches that want to talk politics should go back to pre 1954 rules, file a tax return each year and pay taxes on ...

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

@glennlab This was right about when Joe McCarthy was tail-gunning his way through all his fictitious godless communists. My guess is that this amendment was a piece of collateral damage we now have to endure, long after old Joe was dead and buried.

A few items from an FFRF newsletter

glennlab comments on Jun 11, 2024:

I am like a god.

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

I'm more of a Bacchus guy, m'self. I've let myself go a bit since they made that statue, but still. LOL

Deny the crime, elect the convict.

glennlab comments on Jun 11, 2024:

I've removed the paywall on this https://www.nytimes.com/2024/06/09/opinion/presbyterian-church-evangelical-canceled.html?unlocked_article_code=1.y00.73o_.aBV6dHdQkkmY=url-share The churches that want to talk politics should go back to pre 1954 rules, file a tax return each year and pay taxes on ...

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

I'm sorry Mr. French and his family had to go through that. It's one thing to be subjected to ignorant bigotry by strangers, quite another to find it in those you thought were your friends and spiritual brethren. Religion isn't the only place you can find abject and contradictory hypocrisy. But for those who submit to religious institutions, it's like receiving permission to abandon common sense and wallow in the hypocrisy like pigs in their own excrement. They should all be taxed, and I would prefer to see them all disappear.

Oh my DOG!!

Redheadedgammy comments on Jun 10, 2024:

The birds revenge is so, so good!! 🤣🤣🤣

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

The bird has his moment!

If y'all can access the series "Cunk on Earth", watch it! 'Philomena Cunk' is played by British ...

Lauren comments on Jun 10, 2024:

I can still hear her deadpan delivery while reading this meme - she was a hoot!

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

She has also worked with Ricky Gervais, who I also love.

So, what do you think about my new clock?

Polemicist comments on Jun 10, 2024:

I'm just glad you weren't having a bar of any barometer puns.

zeuser replies on Jun 11, 2024:

That sounds like a challenge. Let me see what I can do.

So, what do you think about my new clock?

Polemicist comments on Jun 10, 2024:

Why would anyone want to know what day it is? Surely it's a barometer.