No exaggeration at all. Follow me for more intimacy tips.

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

Sent that to Bentonville and it will be plastered all over the ladies department in days.

Cannot take it lightly

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

If you got too close the first time, maybe not either.

A disappointment of growing up

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

Sorry kid, but it's only a short term thing.

Extra security, coin operated

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

Now on sale at home depot.....

I agree! Worst apocalypse ever! Wish they were all gone!!!! 😂😂😂😂

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

If you can't back up your conspiracy theories, it must be someone elses fault.

Watch how fast they care about pronouns.

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

If man was created in gods image, then how do you explain women?

How to kill getting laid

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

Didn't even make it to a first date.

Just in. You may be eligible.

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

And which mega-wealthy mega-church is going to cough up the green stuff?

Trump does not like Emmanuel Macron, he will build a new statue of liberty

EricJones comments on Apr 11, 2024:

trump only likes people who are dumber than him, because they're the only people who will vote for him.

You thought it was just a fairy tale?

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

Looks like Goldilocks is just right.

The "short and tubby" section, where I shop, isn't impressive either, TBH.

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

If he's looking for a horney outlaw, he's got the right posse

Xavier said it

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

Go for it dude.

I make sure to eat outside to avoid this

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

That's why my washer and dryer are in the basement-I wouldn't make it down the steps and still be vertical.

Now you know...

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

Child support is gonna be a bitch.

Oops, I would've been tempted. 😆

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

Scrabble with candles-interesting idea.

I call it short and sweet

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

My late girlfriend would have agreed with that.

“The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value”………….

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

When I retired, the night shift gave me a retirement card with a gift card. I placed the gift on the table and began reading the card. One lady kept saying to me "there's a gift card there worth $50, did you see the card?" I said yes but what's important is the retirement card and what everybody wrote to me. Mr Warner is right-it's not the value but the heart behind it.

More of the same…

EricJones comments on Apr 10, 2024:

Either Melania signed the pre-nup from hell, or she's afraid he'll have her deported before the divorice ink is dry.

Hmm, my queue is starting to clog up, so here's another set for the post eclipse, post college hoops...

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

Can't say that Cap didn't ask for it. They should change the sign to say "back seat driving school"

Tough job if your eyes aren't good.

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

We learned a lot from the covid apocalypse. The original cut and paste- The way they did special effects in movies before computers.

I have friends like that…

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

I think his imaginary family just bailed on him.

More eclipse…

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

Usually what I see when I wake up in the morning.

Obsessive compulsive…

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

Maybe that's the way to not get eaten.

"A forgotten proposal"

EricJones comments on Apr 9, 2024:

King George was a good example of what powers to not give to one person.

It got dark as my humor

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

I had clouds and some raindrops.

Saw the eclipse earlier, what a sight!

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

That's a whole new definition of human shield.

He has done it many times

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Is that why they call him "lightning"??

Therefore, you must tip

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Are they getting the short end of the stick?

I didn't know a cow was this holy

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Only in India.... Personally I draw the line at dogs and cats.

Jesus, it's not necessary

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Maybe he likes redheads.

A clarification is needed

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

I used to know a few sikh doctors, don't know if they worked 7-11 to get through school though.

Sleeping on that job would be an occupational hazard, no?

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

The only thing that guy should do in the kitchen is wash the dishes.

Which Tuesday? 😆

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Swing by the chinese laundry to pick up your goods on your way.

Signing my name with this today....

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

I'm not gonna argue.

When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross-- ---- Upton ...

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

Shame he didn't live to see that possibly coming true. This should be plastered on the front page of every newspaper in the land.

Women found him super attractive

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

They liked the bank account

Scientist Stable Genius

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

You can tell when he has absolutely no knowledge of the subject at hand-he babbles all over the place and makes no sense at all, which is most of the time his mouth is open.

Be inspired !!

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

And he and his stupid followers can't figure out why he's considered the worst president ever.

Long wanting to be an author,

EricJones comments on Apr 8, 2024:

The wannabe writer better not give up the day job.

Made under a DEI grant

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

He's been hanging around jar-jar binks too long.

Keep expectations low

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

In this day and age he does have a valid point.

“Mankind keeps being told what to think and what to believe by shamans, priests and ideologues.

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

It's not for nothing that the followers of those people are called flocks of sheep.

Back then…

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

It's interesting to follow how language changes over time. And how technology has accelerated that change.

Me on Facebook...

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

Isn't that what social media's all about?

Who would've thought

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

It can start thr car's motor, so why can't it start her motor? s e b

From a helpful neighbor

EricJones comments on Apr 7, 2024:

Somebody having a hard time on garbage night?????

Taco Cat spelled backwards is Taco Cat…..

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

I hope the litter box is full of fresh litter.

I know but I settled for a pizza last night

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

I like to call it pizza and dessert.

Medieval redaction. Some things never change.

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

Is that the new trump tower?

Crazy damn bipeds…

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

Us guys just give it a good shake instead, much easier.

Another failure to communicate

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

He must have a lot of that green stuff, because she's not marring him for his brain.

The only people profiting here are the short sellers.... [dailykos.com]

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

Just another of his big ideas that has crashed and burned.

Village idiot sums it up perfectly

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

The truss steel is mangled to hell, any idiot can see that.

Almost him

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

She didn't get where she is on her legal abilities and lets just leave it at that.

Talk about an ego.... This is hanging on the wall of his home in Bedminster...

EricJones comments on Apr 6, 2024:

Maybe once he delivers the triplets in his belly and his hair grows back so he doesn't need the comb over anymore. That moron has no bottom

AI is brutal

EricJones comments on Apr 4, 2024:

Nah-that's just father time getting even.

"If God didn't want them to be sheared, he wouldn't have made them sheep!" -- the Calvera ...

EricJones comments on Apr 4, 2024:

I wouldn't put that past him-he'll do anything for a buck and he doesn't care who he takes the money from.

Hey, Santa Anna! Pick two! nyuck nyuck

EricJones comments on Apr 4, 2024:

I think the real estate guy and the metaphors guy know each other.

She was not doing erratic behavior on purpose

EricJones comments on Apr 4, 2024:

Nah, she just has her little brain in her butt.

Follow me for more useful tips

EricJones comments on Apr 4, 2024:

Should be on the front bumper and tailgating the car in front.

How can I get one of those?

EricJones comments on Apr 3, 2024:

That sounds like fun. I might try it sometime.

Test question: What is a protozoa? Me: One who tozoas for money.

EricJones comments on Apr 3, 2024:

The old vw bug, You could get 0 to 60 in ten seconds if you got out and pushed it off the line.

Sooner or later, I will be there John.

EricJones comments on Apr 3, 2024:

At least they remembered to go to the meeting.

Free the nipple, buddy-boy...

EricJones comments on Apr 3, 2024:

Love the packing insert.

Enough said

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

That close to the shore he's gonna hit his head on the bottom-again.

Good Morning!!!! Have a good Tuesday!!!

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

I'm with ozzy-I usually start with the ears, they break off the solid bunnies easier.

Careful what u wish for...

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

Looks like king midas got there first.

Let's be considerate

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

My feet and knees wouldn't be too happy.

Everything he touches turns to 💩

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

I like the poet there on 8th st.

So Trumpty Dumpty has just posted bond of 175 Biglies: [abc.net.au]

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

He's flouted the legal system his entire life and now they hand him a free pass. I wanted to see him humiliated on the front pages of the newspapers when they take away his properties.

The complimentary centerfold! Hahahahaha!!!

EricJones comments on Apr 2, 2024:

So that's what Mary really looks like!!!!!!!!

Who are the immigrants.

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

And don't forget the weapons-those are from the white man too.

Well that was as quick as I expected.

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

trump university, trump casino, trump airlines and anything else with his name on it has a tendency to crash and burn. At least he's consistent

I had a solution

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

Just sound proof the shower and everything will be fine.

Politically right

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

Yea, I'll buy that.

A cruel joke for breakfast time

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

For me thats supper, not breakfast.

Don't forget to wish Happy April Fool's to friends

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

Ain't that the truth.

Um I don’t think so. I hardly know you..

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

That's what god did to mary, so like father- like son.

MAGA Crowd Deranged By Satirical Trump Bible So, as we've all heard, Donald Trump has started ...

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

And the hole gets deeper.

Aaahhh...the good old days!!!

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

The bench front seat did make things a lot easier. How the times have changed.

Don't say anything

EricJones comments on Apr 1, 2024:

Mohawk mullett?

Ted Cruz and his wife

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

He's married to marjorie green??

Laws are laws 🤣🤣

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

If I cut my finger slicing the cabbage is that where the two laws intersect?

Happy Easter!!! 🐰🐣🧟

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

These are great. The dark side of easter.

Happy Easter all...

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

Just do what trump does-drop another ball near the green and shout "found it".

Oh oh! Someone is in trouble.

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

Billy might want to have a dna test done, juuuust to be sure.

Red Riding Hood needs anti-discrimination training

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

Maybe it's a full moon and her inner werewolf is coming out.

A little wishful thinking to start your day

EricJones comments on Mar 31, 2024:

Isn't that what happened to scrooge when the third ghost visited him?

It wasn’t me!! I swear!

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

After all those years they're probably no good, so where's the evidence.

I like aggressive women but...

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

She sounds like the she hulk if you ask me.

We all know that!

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

My question is this-how the hell did trump get into Wharton to begin with. Last time I checked they're a little picky who they let in. Unless they raised the bar after he got there.

He's ready y'll, you hear?

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

I wonder if they know they can get dental insurance through Obamacare.

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

That's why you should have a futon in the recroom.

Witness protection program...

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

Looks like a stunt one of my cats would try to pull.

“Of all possessions a friend is the most precious”…………….Herodotus

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

All the money in the world will never buy you a good, true friend.

"No Man Is An Island... Except for Fred Madagascar" Mike Harding

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

And a big island he is too.

Nailed it again....

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

Well he did come back from the dead and walk the areas where he once lived and preached.

Salesman resume

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2024:

He's selling something he's never read, Like the bits about covet, adultery, lying, and probably a few other things.

Hard pass Auntie Griselda….

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2024:

The name alone is a very red flag.

Don't worry, the starvation will kill me first.

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2024:

These are a great bunch.