Posting one for all those indignant women.

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2023:

That also could accidents because of very distracted drivers.

Looks like home!

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2023:

Putting the urinals together with the sink, interesting idea.

That's what happens when you try to date two women,

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2023:

Or maybe it was Jake and you weren't talking insurance.....

He tried to warn them to no avail

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2023:

That's the problem with historical movies-everybody already knows how it's going to end.

My new reading list

EricJones comments on Mar 30, 2023:

Nice ones.

The Popey is a rapper

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2023:

Vanilla ice has some competition.

Who would have thunk it...

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2023:

Mine just kock stuff off the counters and shelving.

In between, we garden.

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2023:

My mother and grandfather came to this country from England after the war. If there's one thing the English are known for, it's planting a garden. It's in my DNA.

　　　　　　　　　　　　　

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2023:

That's why I have all the ev's in my house on the same channel. I can do things and still catch the movie. If I sit down to watch, it's game over, I'm out.

What was it like growing up?

EricJones comments on Mar 29, 2023:

I think a few daddies have anger issues.

My salad diet is not going as planned, so I just lie about it.

EricJones comments on Mar 28, 2023:

It's all in how you word it.

That's how I like it. Simply elite. 😆

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

Before I fry something I put a bit too much olive oil in the pan, then when it's ripping hot I place a slice of bread in the pan to fry and soak up the excess oil. Yum.

The difference between the geography of women and men

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

You'll get no argument from me.

Introverts can never unite, unless remotely…

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

I walked out of a bachelor party after about 10 minutes, so I agree with #1

I guess he didn't want to embarrass them.

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

Well, he's right

If they sewed the conductor's music sheets together as a prank, then the score would be tied, too.

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

I think Carl had a very sheltered childhood.

Such accolades to a pioneer in literature

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

If you're reading them you can use 2 hands. It's looking at the pictures that you only need one hand.

Location please. ;)

EricJones comments on Mar 27, 2023:

Just roll me up and smoke me when I die.

I prefer Chengiz Khan

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

The old testament god has more blood on his hands than adolf hitler but christians seem to forget that. And that's the god that jesus worshiped.

What's the rush?

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

Only because 3 bucks won't get you in the door at starbucks.

Mine is one of those tough old houses. 😆

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

Wallboard vs plaster. Not a fair fight.

You will see clearly

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

Just far enough below the line that you don't have to explain it to your little kids.

Always with the excuse...

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

The blame anybody else for the damage you did party.

Coming soon to a police station near you....

EricJones comments on Mar 25, 2023:

I can't wait until the other inmates pin his ass to the floor and shave off his comb over.

What a beautiful analogy! I get emotional.

EricJones comments on Mar 22, 2023:

Unless you're running for president and have to pay hush money and then get caught, and your wife finds out about it on the front page of the paper.

Let us not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless when facing them.

EricJones comments on Mar 22, 2023:

I used to be a volunteer firefighter. Here's to all those who run in when everybody else is running out. To all those in blue, olive drab, and anybody else who puts the saftey of others above their own.

🤣🤣🤣

EricJones comments on Mar 22, 2023:

Sparky, my shih tzu will sit outside in a thunderstorm, absolute downpour, and hates a bath.

So true, so true...

EricJones comments on Mar 22, 2023:

That's why I prefer potato chips. I have a cat that does that. He picks his wet food up with his paw and then eats it and then licks his paw.

The plan did not pan out as planned.

EricJones comments on Mar 22, 2023:

He'll probably use the stolen election defense. Claim he won by 100 million votes and that makes him president for life. Which should be enough for his lawyer to plead insanity, which trump already proved he is. And when he gets out, he'll have a job as a viagra spokesperson.

Yes, they deserve much better. 😆

EricJones comments on Mar 13, 2023:

If califorina grapes/raisins can have "I heard it through the grapevine", why can't potatoes have "I only have eyes for you"?

They don't get it either by the look of it.

EricJones comments on Mar 13, 2023:

Pete and Repete

A big wet mess.

EricJones comments on Mar 13, 2023:

Florida and Texas idea of sex ed.

One of my humor gurus when I was a whipper snapper.

EricJones comments on Mar 13, 2023:

They could and did lampoon anything and everything they could and it was clean humor. They deflated a lot of egos.First thing I did was go to the back cover and try to figure it out, then fold it. Happy 102 and many more.

Just remember this

EricJones comments on Mar 11, 2023:

It takes a brave man to have a hangover.

So stupid they can't even tell when they are being openly mocked...

EricJones comments on Mar 11, 2023:

They're too stupid to know they're morons.

“I think a hero is any person really intent on making this a better place for all ...

EricJones comments on Mar 8, 2023:

Somebody shove this in the face of the governor and state legislature of florida.

Kamala Babble

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

Sounds just like every other talking head in washington.

True enough, but...

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

How true.

Just a matter of time.

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

From the looks of it she gave up a long time ago.

A slight misunderstanding?

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

So long as the cashier was cute, fine. But if it was the little old lady working to make some money to pay for her nursing home room that's a different story.

Do not pass go, do not collect...

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

Somebody missed a few science classes-like the ones related to botany.

Be on the look-out.

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

When it gets high enough it's gonna explode and give new meaning to the saying raining cats and dog poop.

Cheese IS thicker…

EricJones comments on Mar 6, 2023:

Especially on the day of the big game.

The priest has heard it before

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

It's the priest who keeps hearing all those voices in his head.

We have reached consensus.

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

You'll get no argument from me.

And men don't normally turn into crazy cat ladies until their 60s.

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

And women start growing a mustache in their 50's, so that makes things about even.

It was bound to happen eventually.

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Given that roughly 50% of the population has a weenie and far more than that have smartphones, yea, I can see that.

Some things are just necessary.

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Bait and switch.

I try to be careful, but....

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

I thought that happened because of a really full bladder.

The truth will come out

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Nothing kills a really good sex life than a marriage and kids. Usually.

Walgreens Says It Won't Sell Abortion Pills In 20 GOP-Led States

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Having been a hospital pharmacy technician for over 40 years I am way beyond pissed that a bunch of misogynistic knuckle dragging state attorneys general are telling walgreens how to practice pharmacy. That is just plain wrong. In case those bozo's didn't know it, they can't force companies doing legal business in other states (say- pennsylvania) to obey the laws in their state (say- texas). And if this problem makes it to the supreme court-which it shouldn't-you know the catholic church controlled court will agree with the anti-abortion states.

The perfect end

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Just make sure he has the right address.

It's Saturday, the storms have passed, only one tree down, supposed to be sunny and mild. I'm Fine.

EricJones comments on Mar 5, 2023:

Not no more, I retired on new years eve.

How high is high?

EricJones comments on Mar 2, 2023:

REALLY happy bunnies.

Life's a bitch, then you die.

EricJones comments on Mar 2, 2023:

Just dump it into the compost heap and use it to grow vegetables.

I love it when they reuse the same picture…

EricJones comments on Mar 1, 2023:

So many captions so little time.

Go Campbell's!

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Welcome to the real world. A loving home is what counts.

School must have been interesting.

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Maybe now somebody will get that pothole fixed.

Nope, wasn't me.

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

I have shih tzu's. They're just not big enough to make a large volume of gas. Although bean burritos are off the menu. Why take chances.

Kids say the darndest things.

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Well, looks like little johnny isn't saying grace anymore.

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

I had a girlfriend back in the early 80's used to joke about that. We weren't together long enough to put it to a real test though.

My idea of heaven…

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

I love #2, just change unemployed to retired.

Way to go Thor... [nypost.com]

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

If sailors can have a girl in every port, why can't he?

Random quotes for Monday…

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Too true.

We are fast approaching the stage of the ultimate inversion: the stage where the government is free ...

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

It's closer than most people think. Had janurary 6 been successful we would be there.

Totally missed by the Bible

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Every civilization in that era had gods knocking up virgins, they were a dime a dozen. And they all bore children that were super humans. Christians are just to stupid to accept the truth that they're stupid enough to believe a fairy tale.

Shouldn't we feel good?

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

I just missed the cutoff, I was born in feb. 1960

They aren't atheists; they think they are gods. 😆

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

#2 looks like some of my cats.

Wear the dang masks they said....

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Some new suits for the sports illustrated swimsuit issue?

Never annoy a cat...

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

That's why I keep all my sharp objects in secure places. Between the inside and outside cats I have, I wouldn't last long.

“Poverty is not an accident.

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

Why worry about the poor when giving tax cuts to the wealthy is far more important. After all, who gives more money to members of congress? And the people who make the laws are loaded and set for life so poverty has no bearing on their lives, so why should they care.

Ukrainian Mastercard commercial....

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

That's a good one, I love it. Sell a luxury yacht or two and it's paid for

Very windy day here today, 60 mph wind gusts, staying in bed kinda day! Hope you all are having a ...

EricJones comments on Feb 27, 2023:

That's how I found my cat tiny, eating out of the neighbors garbage. Took me a few weeks to get her in the house, now after 10 years she's happy house kitty.

Looks right to me…

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

Not a bad idea.

I'll take that as a no then...

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

Their women are cute though. Maybe that's the problem-they don't want to share with us.

Seems to happen every festival season

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

I hope there are a few extra rolls in there because it's gonna take a lot of wiping to get that asshole clean.

He did not think out his answer well enough.

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

Right up there with does this dress make me look fat?

I used to struggle learning Roman numerals... Until I got to 159. Now it just CLIX

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

That's a good one.

I need a vacation!

EricJones comments on Feb 26, 2023:

Actually we all live in a terrarium. The earth is a giant terrarium.

Some guys will do anything for anal.

EricJones comments on Feb 25, 2023:

And don't forget the gas mask he's wearing on the first date is for covid.

The rat traps are a nice touch.....

EricJones comments on Feb 25, 2023:

Sounds like Anna Nicole Smith.

The Hypocrisy of the Church Catholic Church: No meat on Fridays during Lent: Ok so no eggs ...

EricJones comments on Feb 25, 2023:

Never point out their contradictions because it makes their tiny little brains explode.

Been there many times. You?

EricJones comments on Nov 5, 2022:

I can't remember the last time I had 5 hours sleep, let alone more.

Three happy dudes 😆

EricJones comments on Nov 5, 2022:

how do you eat pizza like that without everything sliding off the crust onto your face.

Dang, it's so hard to keep this all sorted!

EricJones comments on Oct 5, 2022:

Ship all the illegals who came here looking for work to better themselves back to Florida to help rebuild the place and see the welcome they get....

Best arguments in the world for keeping abortion legal.

EricJones comments on Oct 4, 2022:

A trump rally is proof that the shallow end of the gene pool really is.

Herschel Walker is ridiculously stupid and childish, there was a time, because he is black, he would...

EricJones comments on Oct 3, 2022:

Remember he's a card carrying trumper which automatically qualifies him as an idiot. CTE is just the icing on the cake.

“Great things are not accomplished by those who yield to trends and fads and popular ...

EricJones comments on Sep 26, 2022:

He's right. Just look at movies that use modern music for a soundtrack and those that use more classical type music. Which ones seem to withstand the test of time. It might be the writing and acting but I think the music also makes a difference

Makes ya wonder.

EricJones comments on Sep 26, 2022:

Virgin births were a dime a dozen in that area in that era-so who knows how many virgins the great sky fairy nailed.

Healthcare in America is a joke.... [youtube.com]

EricJones comments on Sep 26, 2022:

I work in the industry and health care in this country is almost third world in nature. It's the laughing stock of the major countries of the world.

Oops. I may have gotten rid of all my wordly goods a bit too hastily I'm afraid.

EricJones comments on Sep 26, 2022:

Somebody keeps announcing a new date for the rupture and it keeps blowing past with nothing happening. You would think they would notice a pattern to their proclamations. ationsations

"In the US, we’re happy to claim collective responsibility for Apollo 11.

EricJones comments on Sep 26, 2022:

The first major genocide in North America happened at the hands of the Europeans and the catholic church. The cultural genocide of the last 150 or so years was at the church telling the federal government-both US and Canada-that forcing the children of native americans to church run boarding schools they would tame and civilize them-make them "white". Both governments agreed.The adults were forced onto reservations and the children taken away. These actions were the ideas of a few morons, not the population as a whole.

Heres how it's done folks

EricJones comments on Sep 25, 2022:

The missing link between primordial ooze and 2 celled organisms.

Scholars couldn't figure why?🤔

EricJones comments on Sep 25, 2022:

nice one.

Just my luck! I decide to take public transportation to work, and this happens...

EricJones comments on Sep 23, 2022:

Nobody is ever going to believe that late excuse.

My watchdog - well, pretending to be. He is pretty useless, actually. 😆

EricJones comments on Sep 21, 2022:

He's a cutie. I know the feeling. I have 7 shih tzu's and one crazy amazon parrot. Guess who guards the back door. The dogs will bark and go away, the bird looks and says "don't know you" and it's game on.

Over 1,600 books were banned in U.S. school districts in one year – and the number is increasing

EricJones comments on Sep 21, 2022:

A coordinated effort nationwide by the far right to make their agenda of christian minority hate the rule of the land. Many of them think that reading a book about LGBTQ is going to make you LGBTQ. They can't accept that people are different than them and are trying to make them and all they stand for go away. The genie is out of the bottle (closet?), learn to accept it and make the world a better place.

That was one hell of a class

EricJones comments on Sep 21, 2022:

The tutors name wasn't Timmy Leary was it?

And so Judaism began with an ouchie.

EricJones comments on Sep 21, 2022:

That's porn-quickly, tell the far right to ban the bible from all bookshelves.

Looks more like you've been kicked out by your missus, mate. 😆

EricJones comments on Sep 21, 2022:

Did the dog win too?