Women are more inspired by religion

EricJones comments on Apr 30, 2024:

I guess this doesn't apply to priests and other high ranking male members of christianity

Thought of the day...

EricJones comments on Apr 30, 2024:

If you're driving an econobox it should be ok-not enough room to properly swing the ax.

Go figure...

EricJones comments on Apr 30, 2024:

Groan, although points for a good effort.

Let's rename some animals

EricJones comments on Apr 30, 2024:

My dogs put their front paws on my legs and stand there, my cats stratch at me or just meow at me a lot, my birds usually have a bowl of seed and pellets at all times and get a bowl of fresh fruits and veggies everyday.

Boomers'' moms.

EricJones comments on May 2, 2024:

I think mom's being a bad example. Is groot about to unload a ball of sap?

VonShitzInPants

EricJones comments on May 2, 2024:

trump's hawking depends now too??? What's next-gas masks?

Will fight for Trump but not in the army

EricJones comments on May 4, 2024:

Just more proof that the education system in this country is in really bad. Anybody that had a basic civics class on how our government works would know that super asshole belongs in a supermax, not being worshiped like some deity

I hope it happens soon!

EricJones comments on May 4, 2024:

That ain't trump-box is too small to hold his fat ass

The trump trial continues, may he rot in jail.

EricJones comments on May 5, 2024:

trump wanted a hope hickey, instead hope gave him a kick in the balls.

On a Klingon ship, this would call for an assassination.

EricJones comments on May 7, 2024:

I'm the only human in my house, so I don't use a glass, I just drink straight out of the bottle.

RFK Jr and the worm…

EricJones comments on May 10, 2024:

That noise you hear is his father and the rest of the Kennedy clan spinning in their graves.

Cohen under cross examination, should be fun

EricJones comments on May 13, 2024:

I see Melania's had some work done....

I can't seem to win

EricJones comments on May 14, 2024:

Satan han morals and ethics.

Just to be clear here...

EricJones comments on May 14, 2024:

They both go chomp-chomp when you get too close.

Don't hate me because I create beauty...

EricJones comments on May 14, 2024:

That's the conversation my late girlfriend and I would have. She used to call me speedy and it wasn't because I was a fast distance runner.

Sounds like a good idea to me....

EricJones comments on May 14, 2024:

That's gonna be a whoooole lot of people.

The cheering section....

EricJones comments on May 16, 2024:

I didn't think beavis and butt-head would stoop so low as too be seen with trump

And this crystal will help with that rheumatism.

EricJones comments on May 16, 2024:

The only paino player who will wear out her shoes before her fingers. The amulet will keep the philosophers going for decades. In addition to "farewell to arms" they could also display "the legend of sleepy hollow" with the headless horseman (or in this case horsewoman). There are some really good ones here.

You find this on the floor in church ...

EricJones comments on May 17, 2024:

That's the only reason to go to church-palm some money out of the collection plate when it goes around. I used to work with a lady who was catholic-almost never went to church, and when she did go that's what she would do each time the plate went around. And it would go around 3 or 4 times a service.

Now you, you watch me not care..

EricJones comments on May 21, 2024:

Prince charmings chances with snow white are gonna be zero if he uses that alarm clock.

Hmm, maybe that means I can be the scallion of scalawags?

EricJones comments on May 23, 2024:

There are some falling rock signs around where I live and about 40 years ago somebody put a bumper sticker from a local rock station on the bottom of the signs.

Sure tastes good...

EricJones comments on May 25, 2024:

Serve it next to a bar--bell

The Dunning-Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which people with low ability at a task tend to ...

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

And these idiots are the ones who yell the loudest because they know everything despite the fact that their logic circuits are totally fried, if they ever existed at all.

Poor spellers??

EricJones comments on May 26, 2024:

Between auto-correct and the looming AI field, we may never be able to communicate electronically again

There is always one

EricJones comments on May 27, 2024:

She could save herself a lot of work if she just dropped the cigarette.

New York opens new library....

EricJones comments on May 30, 2024:

The only way that tub of lard is gonna get any exercise into his life.

The last man I talked with on Fitness Singles. A sexist, lazy user.

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2024:

Your profile put it all out there on the table. Anybody who read it top to bottom should know what you want and where they stand in relation to that. Any guy who thinks otherwise is just plain stupid and needs to be taught humility amongst other things. Not having someone to share the joys of life sometimes is no fun, but having someone in your life who makes you miserable is far worse. You make the best with what you have and if you bump into him on the trail one day, all the better. And love what you did with Paul Simon's lyrics, that was great.

The new Monopoly game seems fun…

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

Don't give him any ideas, he'll try to sell that game to line his pockets with. It's not beneath him to do it.

You can tell early on... experts say

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2024:

The recruiters are getting to them really early these days.

All it’s good for…

EricJones comments on Jun 3, 2024:

In many older buildings in Europe-especially public ones- that's what you have-a hole in the floor and you better have good aim. Most have been replaced with modern toilets, but there are still a few here and there.

Translation…

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2024:

I think a rough translation is americans are fat.

Portrait of a hatemonger.

EricJones comments on Jun 9, 2024:

There was an interview on npr last week with one of the behind the scenes people from the apprentice and it was really bad. trump treated women and blacks as scum and called them every vile name he could. He would fire them just because of their gender or skin color and it was all cut out to keep the show on the air.

I messed that up...

EricJones comments on Jun 11, 2024:

Huston, we have a problem.

DA: Anything to add, Chuckles? Chuckles, pulling out bulb horn: HONK HONK

EricJones comments on Jun 13, 2024:

So I see trumps delivering the 6:00 news now.

Somehow I’m just not hungry anymore…

EricJones comments on Jun 18, 2024:

I'd steer away from the po-po platter.

A good question.

EricJones comments on Jun 20, 2024:

Just put a cross on the drag building and hang a sign that says "drag queens for jesus" and everything will be fine.

Look how he mixes the reds with the blacks for spice! And that guy is a bird flu carrier if I ever ...

EricJones comments on Jun 23, 2024:

That's one good thing about sex after 50 something-putting std's aside-nobody's getting pregnant.

Had to take a couple of mental health days but feeling better!!!

EricJones comments on Jul 4, 2024:

I'd stay away from the tylenol hard seltzer. Between the tylenol and the alcohol, your liver is gonna be toast. I should go to the kitty rave, maybe some of mine are there.

Happy Fourth of July, no these are not related

EricJones comments on Jul 4, 2024:

I have a few kitties on my porch now who look like that one.They were romping in the back yard and a storm hit and began to rain and they got caught in it.

I'm with you, mate. 😎

EricJones comments on Jul 9, 2024:

I'm using my hedge trimmers really hard in my late girlfriends yard (about 2 hours a session-her yard was really overgrown) and when I'm done give the blades a spray. Use it all over the place.

Short Monday for me!!! 😊😊😊

EricJones comments on Jul 9, 2024:

Tucson is an suv-it doesn't have a trunk, and if it's giving off an odor-it ain't perfect anymore.

We are almost there! No wait!

EricJones comments on Jul 9, 2024:

I love the MC Escher slinky.

The RNC met today, it looks like they have no morals, they nominated an adjudicated rapist, ...

EricJones comments on Jul 16, 2024:

I keep having a scary thought-the old phrase "nice guys finish last".

And then there is that statue decoration angle...

EricJones comments on Jul 16, 2024:

That's why I keep my bed sheets tucked in.

Happy HOT Wednesday afternoon!!! 🌞🌞🌞🥵🥵🥵🥵

EricJones comments on Jul 18, 2024:

Bill Clinton's sax playing gotten so bad that he has to dress up like a gorilla to get somebody to listen to him? When someone is trying to find themselves they usually do it alone. The entourage kinda defeats the purpose.

Yep, not interested!

EricJones comments on Jul 21, 2024:

She might feel better if she stopped dating alpha males.

Went hiking and 4-wheeling in the mountains today, hope you all had a great day too!

EricJones comments on Jul 22, 2024:

mom closes her eyes and the count down to the the loudest, most shrill shreeks you have ever heard has begun.

Okay, it isn’t Trump, but damnit it is hilarious!

EricJones comments on Apr 23, 2019:

Poor turtle's probably hiding in his shell out of shame.

Exactly right

EricJones comments on Apr 24, 2019:

I'm not going to talk if I don't need to.

What a load of bullshit I say, what's her's is her's and what's mine is mine.

EricJones comments on Apr 25, 2019:

Who the hell made that sign, Phyllis Schlafly?? She did the work-she gets the pay and probably at 70 to 80% of her male co-workers.

Quoits......

EricJones comments on Apr 28, 2019:

That's not how I remember playing quoits

This has been helpful advice in the past. 😀

EricJones comments on Apr 29, 2019:

Practicing what he's preaching

Is it too obvious?

EricJones comments on Apr 30, 2019:

Interesting concept.

There are about 10 billion Ben Franklin's in circulation.

EricJones comments on May 4, 2019:

The tooth fairy will be stone cold sober for a while...

There are two seasons in Canada.Winter and construction.

EricJones comments on May 4, 2019:

Looks like the roads around here, you bounce from hole to hole. Besides with enough patching material the road gets repaved every few years

I went to the Doctor again yesterday and asked for a prostrate examination, she said, “NO, you do ...

EricJones comments on May 4, 2019:

I'll play doctor with her.....

Big mistake😱😅

EricJones comments on May 4, 2019:

Mad magazine-home of some of the biggest crazies to ever put pen to paper. How I miss them.

More often than not

EricJones comments on May 7, 2019:

What about politicians wearing diapers?

All aboard!

EricJones comments on May 7, 2019:

Elmos mom is a very busy girl...

Spanky could not contain himself

EricJones comments on May 7, 2019:

I'm with him

It's that time of year for the daisy speedo dukes

EricJones comments on May 8, 2019:

If it's a speedo, it's an interesting pattern; but don't leave the pool area.

I love a stroll in the woods...

EricJones comments on May 8, 2019:

Are you using a shovel for a walking stick?

My downfall... cake.

EricJones comments on May 8, 2019:

Cake is fuel to work out harder.

Y'all I am in a mood 🤣🤣🤣

EricJones comments on May 8, 2019:

The first and third are good ones, second is a real pisser, and a few ideas for number 4-Bolton, McConnell, Huckabee-Sanders, just for starters

Laughing through the tragedy, because there is no god to pray to.

EricJones comments on May 9, 2019:

Lame excuse for "I don't care"

If you’re a sexual deviant I figured the language wouldn’t offend...but really cute meme!

EricJones comments on May 18, 2019:

That's a good one. Hopefully his nickname "stumpy" only applies to his arms.

It is astonishing the lengths to which a person, or a people, will go in order to avoid a truthful ...

EricJones comments on May 18, 2019:

How true.

Gonna take some more time...

EricJones comments on May 18, 2019:

With her I'll never be done.

I might listen to his pitch.

EricJones comments on May 20, 2019:

Good old Vlad the impaler, nice guy-just a bit of a sore loser.

Keep calm - it's true 🤣🤣🤣

EricJones comments on May 21, 2019:

I know the feeling, that's why I gave up.

The joke below reminds me of the farting dog story by James Heriot.

EricJones comments on May 22, 2019:

I wonder if she's related to "Rip" van winkle.

Church signs

EricJones comments on May 28, 2019:

Do these people ever proof-read???? Or are they just that sexually repressed.

little suzie

EricJones comments on May 31, 2019:

Religion and sex ed at the same time.

Know a couple like this?

EricJones comments on Jun 1, 2019:

And they said it wouldn't last...Actually my ex girlfriend was like that-wanted everything done for her and everything given to her. That's why she's my ex.

And the Pope is Catholic...

EricJones comments on Jun 2, 2019:

Did he use the charmin?

Have you ever been forced to attend an event like a party or wedding while you didn't tend to?

EricJones comments on Jun 3, 2019:

I go long enough to show the flag then get the hell out of Dodge. I once left a bachelor party in less than 10 minutes. Didn't even wait for the introductions- I don't drink, I don't smoke, I'm a vegetarian and I'm gone.

It's a sign!

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2019:

No news is good news.

Sounds just like him...

EricJones comments on Jun 4, 2019:

Did he forget hes lower dentures?

Hate Tickemaster.

EricJones comments on Jun 11, 2019:

There are extra charges for printing, delivery, handling, the ticket, me breathing, etc.

Life is short, wanna play?

EricJones comments on Jun 13, 2019:

Nah,everybody just points and laughs, especially the women

Prayers are cheap.

EricJones comments on Jun 15, 2019:

Religion-preventing humans from advancing for thousands of years and counting.

Sigh. Swoon.

EricJones comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Why does the guy in yellow have his hand in the other guys pocket?

pig parker

EricJones comments on Jun 16, 2019:

Mean little kid...

Some light reading for the evening.

EricJones comments on Jun 16, 2019:

It's called having a job that takes up all your play time.

Alternate theory of Superman’s origin story.

EricJones comments on Jun 17, 2019:

The squeaky wheel doesn't always get greased, sometimes it gets exiled.

Perhaps it should be in Politics

EricJones comments on Jun 17, 2019:

Trump and his war hawk cronies ( bolton etc.) want war, Iran's only pushing back. They didn't react the way trump wanted them to when he pulled out of the treaty. Trump is trying to start a war so when we win he can brag about it as commander in chief.

What I wish would happen to every pedant ...

EricJones comments on Jun 18, 2019:

High intelligence doesn't always mean high common sense.

It's gonna blow..

EricJones comments on Jun 18, 2019:

I don't want to be in that neighbor hood when she lets fly...

Gotta give him some credit.. he got part of it right.

EricJones comments on Jun 18, 2019:

Maybe it's flavored?

Trump refuses to apologize to Central Park Five after their criminal convictions were vacated

EricJones comments on Jun 19, 2019:

Because he thinks he's always right-even when proven by overwhelming evidence that he's wrong-he's just that full of himself. Besides they are black, and he's not exactly fond of anybody that's not a white christian.

Read the whole set of instructions. Someone has a very creative mind.

EricJones comments on Jun 25, 2019:

Somebody was having a good time that day. I just went to their web site and it's a real gas. They look like a fun bunch.

My worst is a lot to handle but my best is a lot of fun.

EricJones comments on Jul 2, 2019:

She's so right. You spend more time with bed hair, no makeup, sweats around the house, etc, than with all dressed up and on best behavior to go out.

Truth! 🤣🤣🤣

EricJones comments on Jul 16, 2019:

One of the eternals speaketh.

Well, it is pretty hot.

EricJones comments on Jul 26, 2019:

If it's too hot-maybe they're already in hell. And shouldn't that sign say " sin bad-little boys good"?

New breed ?

EricJones comments on Jul 27, 2019:

Cute face and can till the garden and flower beds too. Will shred confidential papers, and keep out intruders as well. Need a hole dug in the yard to plant something?-no problem.

And Mother Nature scores for a win!!!

EricJones comments on Jul 31, 2019:

Why didn't that happen 2000 years ago and save mankind a lot of grief.

Question: When having sex, are you quiet or loud?

EricJones comments on Sep 24, 2019:

Happy.

Oops didnt expect that

EricJones comments on Oct 28, 2019:

Weather she really is or not doesn't matter-it's making him think you are that gives you time to get away.

You know that is some funny shit right there 🤣🤣🤣

EricJones comments on Oct 29, 2019:

I'm amazed the fans didn't bring rotten fruits and vegetables and have target practice.

Sounds like she is having a good time

EricJones comments on Oct 29, 2019:

Maybe she has a lisp-ya never know.