Is real women really hard to find these days

MichelleGar1 comments on Nov 30, 2022:

Oh geez, another scammer! 🙄🙄🙄🙄😂😂😂

TomMcGiverin replies on Dec 1, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 I play with them sometimes, sort of a harmless way to get some vicarious payback for the real women on dating sites that treat me unfairly, lie, or play games, even tho the two are unrelated. I know that's twisted, but it's harmless, and it helps me cope.

For those of us that are the black sheep of the family, how true does this ring for you?

Lauren comments on Nov 30, 2022:

Indeed. And we're usually the only one brave enough to face reality.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 30, 2022:

Yup, and probably also explains why I am not close to any of my siblings, esp. now that my parents are both dead.

1.

antman comments on Nov 29, 2022:

I’d consider myself anti gun but also pro freedom. Why should I tell other people what they can buy and own? Because it can be used to kill? We all have things in our house we could use to kill others so where should the line be drawn to determine what we can and cannot own?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 30, 2022:

@antman Bite me, lol...

1.

antman comments on Nov 29, 2022:

I’d consider myself anti gun but also pro freedom. Why should I tell other people what they can buy and own? Because it can be used to kill? We all have things in our house we could use to kill others so where should the line be drawn to determine what we can and cannot own?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 30, 2022:

@antman You really are an ass. No point debating you, and it's not that I'm losing. You just can't be reasoned with.

All five found guilty, four on Conspiracy and Rhodes of Seditious Conspiracy, for at least ...

silverotter11 comments on Nov 29, 2022:

Now to just have don lardo indicted!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 30, 2022:

Don't hold your breath, esp. with Garland...

1.

antman comments on Nov 29, 2022:

I’d consider myself anti gun but also pro freedom. Why should I tell other people what they can buy and own? Because it can be used to kill? We all have things in our house we could use to kill others so where should the line be drawn to determine what we can and cannot own?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 30, 2022:

So you would be ok with everyone having their own rocket launchers, bazookas, etc? Mortar cannons? If they have a big enough yard, maybe they should be able to own their own tanks? I hope that makes you feel comforted the next time you board a commercial airplane, knowing that someone on the ground, that you politically support on the 2nd Amendment, may be waiting on the ground to settle a grudge and blow your plane out of the sky with you in it.. How about everyone being allowed to buy their own C-4 plastic explosives?

All five found guilty, four on Conspiracy and Rhodes of Seditious Conspiracy, for at least ...

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 29, 2022:

Ooooh oooh just wait until they get up to the big house……The bros are gonna give them sumthin” they’ll never forget!!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 29, 2022:

@rainmanjr Well, we can hope, but if there is a racist white gang there, they will be protected.

All five found guilty, four on Conspiracy and Rhodes of Seditious Conspiracy, for at least ...

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 29, 2022:

Ooooh oooh just wait until they get up to the big house……The bros are gonna give them sumthin” they’ll never forget!!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 29, 2022:

I hope you are right, but I doubt it. They will join the Aryan Brotherhood in prison, if they even get sent to a real prison, not Club Fed, so they will have protection from the brothers, as in black men...

Yet another encounter on Match, with a closet conservative and Trumper.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Nov 28, 2022:

There is still a subset of people, especially cons, who think they have the ability to change people and mold them into what they want.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 29, 2022:

@DenoPenno Well, my woman on Match was a political conservative, not a con as in online romance scammer. She hid her true political affiliation because of either shame, manipulation (so she could still get interest or attention from men who were liberal) or both. Also possible she thought she could change or mold the man to her politics, like the above commenter said.

Yet another encounter on Match, with a closet conservative and Trumper.

Julie808 comments on Nov 29, 2022:

Sounds like you made an honest woman out of her, haha. Yes, honesty is best - saves everyone time and energy. Way easier to just swipe "next" rather than to get hopes up, meet and then get torn down for being who you say you are in the first place. Seems more and more political leanings are ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 29, 2022:

Nowadays, conservative means being racist, hating anyone different than you, being socially intolerant, and, like it always did, being selfish and greedy... I wish more conservatives would play fair and honest in the online dating game, esp. the women, because the way the game is usually played, the men put in all the time, effort, and hope to reach out to a dozen or two women a month, in my case, in other men's cases, maybe more. And after all that it sucks to have a woman then get your hopes up by messaging you back, which is fairly rare in the first place, for average looking guys like me, and then find out she is politically incompatible, because she lied or hid her politics in the first place. But, like I said, conservatives don't believe in honesty or fairness in politics, so why would they play any different on dating sites? Really, my only two dealbreakers that are on my end, regardless of whether they are for the woman also, are politics and music. I need compatibility in both of them, because they are both very important to me. I can't date someone who is big on country music, because music is my biggest passion in life, and I hate country music. And, because country music is usually so tied into a person's culture, that difference between them and me is also usually a sign that we will be incompatible in other ways, such as politics and religion.

1.

antman comments on Nov 29, 2022:

I’d consider myself anti gun but also pro freedom. Why should I tell other people what they can buy and own? Because it can be used to kill? We all have things in our house we could use to kill others so where should the line be drawn to determine what we can and cannot own?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 29, 2022:

@Flyingsaucesir antman is an idiot to not already see that. He is being obtuse to even suggest equivalence between household items and weapons of war, or maybe he is just plain stupid..

Yet another encounter on Match, with a closet conservative and Trumper.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Nov 28, 2022:

There is still a subset of people, especially cons, who think they have the ability to change people and mold them into what they want.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 28, 2022:

I do see your point, but in my experience with Match, I really don't think the women who are closet Trumpers and conservatives, who hide that in their profile, until they run across someone like me who confronts them about it, are really out to change anyone and convert them to their viewpoint after they begin dating them. I suspect, rather, that they want to be able to keep their options open, cast as wide a net as they can, for the men who might share the other traits in common, or that have the other traits they are looking for, as far as looks, money, education level, common interests, etc. and then end up with the biggest possible selection of men to sort thru and screen for messaging with, then possibly meeting in person. And the way I think it plays out with these women, is to sift out the men who match up with them on everything but politics, and then see if any of those men, who seem attractive and interesting, are either actually apolitical, or possibly not that strong or sincere about their being liberal or a Dem. But my profile makes it very clear that I am very liberal (tho I don't use the scary term socialist in it, since that would be a kiss of death in my Match dating pool), so I really don't see why so many of them end up replying to me anyway these days. I guess they just don't take me at my honest, sincere word, which, when you think about it, is very condescending and arrogant on their part. Probably the same way some believer women think they can change a non-believing man into becoming religious once they begin dating him. But you're right, some of them do think they can change and mold people into their own image, and what is equally arrogant is them feeling they have the right to do so....

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 28, 2022:

@puff Interesting versatitlity.

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 28, 2022:

@puff Ok, I get it now. I have only rarely heard that used here in America for a male that another man despises. Personally, I have never used the C-word for or about a woman, which is the gender I have normally heard it used about. I guess I just find it way too vulgar to label any women. Guess I've either led a sheltered life, or I am over-sensitive, probably some of both.

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@puff Wonderful sarcasm... He actually told us, during the Clinton scandal over his sexual perjury, that he voted for Bill, even tho he was very much a Repub small businessman, because he "admired him for still being able to get oral sex from a young woman" at Clinton's age. Yeah, he was a real prince of a guy to work for....

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@puff I didn't. This guy was a real gold-plated asshole, as far as the boss that was abusive, rather than a lying cocksucker. He was the boss, and boy did he love to ride me in front of my co-workers, just for his pleasure and amusement. It was obviously about me being way more educated than him, so he resented that I came from a more well off family than him and went to college. So he treated me like the typical college boy worker that he resented and had to put in his place and bully me. What a small-minded, insecure little man he was... I came to find out, a few years later, after I was free from him, that his father, who he had treated like shit while I worked for this asshole, was now estranged from him and wanted nothing to do with him, so, there was that tasty bit of karma to enjoy about him later on.... The guy's father gave me the news himself when I ran into him and asked him about his son, my former boss...

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@puff Agreed, small businesses, it has to be more equal, give and take in respect and cooperation, tho I have worked in small businesses were the boss was a prick and treated me like a slave. So I think you and the oil rig boss were on the same page tho, where you and him got the point that for you to give as much of a fuck as him, he needed to pay you more like him, than just what you were getting paid.. Atta boys, pats on the back, etc. don't mean a fucking thing, as far as appreciation. What does cut it is better or more pay, or more paid time off... So he called you a cocksucker, with a smile on both of your faces. The only time I use that word is as an insult for hetero men that I hate so much they deserve it, because, to me, they are the kind of lying cocksuckers that will lie thru their teeth to stab you in the back at work, while currying favor with the boss to get ahead of you and figureatively suck the boss's cock to get favoratism from him over you. Thus, they deserve my label of being a lying cocksucker, no offense meant to good or decent men who are actually gay...

Hi guys ♥️ I have been avoiding like hell to make a real post for months and I am trying to ...

puff comments on Nov 27, 2022:

Work to live not live to work. Your profession has copped it the last few years, burn anyone out. I try to only stress out regarding work depending on my hourly rate eg $20/ Hr not care so much. $50/ Hr now I'll give a fuck. Keep on keeping on.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

As a delivery truck driver once posted on a discussion board regarding workers and bosses, and their business relationship, he said, for X amount of $ per hour, the boss can expect the worker to sacrifice their body and energy to give them an honest day's hard work done right, if the boss wants more than that, like a sunny attitude, that will cost more $. Take it or leave it... And nowadays, fortunately, workers have more power in the workplace than they had ten or twenty years ago, for now at least, so the bosses know that if they want to require that sunny attitude, without paying more, and fire the worker over it, replacing them may not be as easy as it used to be and surely not as easy as they would like it to be... And I absolutely love seeing that, even if it means worse service for me these days at restaurants and stores, because, as a socialist, it does my heart good to finally see these pricks and bitches that are the bosses finally start to get what they deserve, after all these years of them being able to shit on their workers with no consequences...

Here's why vandals sprayed graffiti at Focus on the Family headquarters

racocn8 comments on Nov 27, 2022:

About fucking time...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

I have been aware of these hateful, phony Christian MFs for a long time. They are truly a hateful, scary bunch of nutcases...

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

summatyme comments on Nov 27, 2022:

I dated a libertarian for a bit who said he would totally support a system where his father would die of an easily preventable and treatable disease because, in his words: "There's too many lazy people who would leech off the socialist programs". By the way, his father DID die of an easily treatable...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@mischl Maybe there was some merit to that, casting them out of the tribe. I wish we could simply throw them all onto a deserted island, so that they could only prey on each other, and leave the rest of alone, to enjoy cooperation, harmony, and peace.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

273kelvin comments on Nov 27, 2022:

What gets me is how hardly anyone is making the business case for Universal healthcare (UH). It is not a coincidence that 49 out of the top 50 1st world nations have adopted it. These are not all run by Marxist lefties. Most are conservative governments. Here are some ideas why UH makes sound ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@mischl So sadly true, and the corporate media also deserves blame too, for the way they play along with promoting the scare tactics of smearing UH with socialism/communism associations.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

273kelvin comments on Nov 27, 2022:

What gets me is how hardly anyone is making the business case for Universal healthcare (UH). It is not a coincidence that 49 out of the top 50 1st world nations have adopted it. These are not all run by Marxist lefties. Most are conservative governments. Here are some ideas why UH makes sound ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

All of your points make great sense, but the reasons it never happens here in the US, is because our pols are way too corrupt and bought off by the HC system, secondly, our corporate media prevents any real discussion of how much better UH would be for our country, thirdly, as this whole discussion thread shows, too many voters care more about people they hate benefitting from UH, and lastly the old scare tactics of equating UH with socialism, communism, and other bogeyman labels is still too effective with many Americans.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

summatyme comments on Nov 27, 2022:

I dated a libertarian for a bit who said he would totally support a system where his father would die of an easily preventable and treatable disease because, in his words: "There's too many lazy people who would leech off the socialist programs". By the way, his father DID die of an easily treatable...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

Everything you said about him makes sense to me. Those people not only have no empathy whatsoever, they can't even understand the concept of it if you explain it to them, as you did. As for your attraction to him initially, I don't judge you for it, as I have been in the dating game again long enough this latest time around, that I realize many women are attracted to the biker type or bad boy types of men, even after the woman hits middle age, including a female friend that I still like, am friends with, and was attracted to in the past. While it is frustrating to me, I know it goes both ways. I personally am not attracted to women who are lacking in empathy, kindness, or the ability to treat a man with sensitivity and supportive love, I know plenty of men my age who are still attracted to the female equivalent of the bad boy or biker guy, women who are high maintainence ball busters, drama queens, or borderline personality types, etc. I think there is something warped in plenty of people in both genders of being attracted to people who provide them with lots of challenge and drama in their relationships. But, as far as I'm concerned, to each their own. Personally, I am too old and tired to want to deal with all that shit in a relationship.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

FvckY0u comments on Nov 26, 2022:

I trust the politicians less than I trust the other money hungry assholes that wield slightly less power and control over my life. I'm fine with either system if run by competent honest people.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@FvckY0u I agree, the pols haven't done shit for us on this, but at least we get a vote on them. The fact that it doesn't change anything is as much the collective fault of the voters as it is the pols, because collectively, we keep voting within the duopoly, but we technically have the power to change that if enough of us woke up, had the courage to vote third party, and then have responsive government in DC. With corporate control of our healthcare system, responsiveness and accountability on their part, to us peasants, is never gonna happen. The difference is that simple, man.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

Carbine comments on Nov 26, 2022:

It's hard to believe that this is true but it may be so.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@mischl But you won't see a single one of those cons turn down their SS benefits once they turn full SS age, same way as in England, as soon as the National Health Service was established, right after WWII, the Tories were the first ones in line to sign up for it. They're all such shameless, fucking hypocrites.. Same thing with the cons here and Medicare, once they turn 65.

Q: Why are so many Americans opposed to a publicly funded health service, when this is common in ...

FvckY0u comments on Nov 26, 2022:

I trust the politicians less than I trust the other money hungry assholes that wield slightly less power and control over my life. I'm fine with either system if run by competent honest people.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

I get that, but the problem with letting the system be run by money hungry assholes on corporate medical death panels, is that, unlike pols, they are even less accountable to us peasants than the pols are. We do at least get to vote on them, while, for the corporate, greedy assholes, our only recourse and way of holding them accountable is to sue them for any clear violations of the law they commit in their race for profit over the health and life of a patient, that results in death or injury. And good luck finding a lawyer that will take them on and win. Because, unlike what you see on TV shows like Law And Order, in the real world, you aren't going to find government prosecutors who are going to go after for profit healthcare organizations with criminal charges for killing or injuring someone by putting profit ahead of the patient's health or life. It doesn't happen, even tho it should.

I recently tried a free membership on POF, after a buddy of mine twisted my arm to do it, after he ...

racocn8 comments on Nov 25, 2022:

I wish I had some magic to help you. At this point, you may want to change tactics. Rotate through the dating sites on the hope that others will be there, especially those catering to older women. I don't much endorse this as I believe many older women give up on either sex or men or both. You might...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 27, 2022:

@racocn8 Amusing story about competition there. Good points about the respective gender roles of men and women in marriages with kids, hadn't thought of those things before. But then again, I never got married and had kids with any women when I was young, only got married later in life, after I and the woman already were childless and too old to start a family together. Your points about the typical scenario for men and women who get married young and start making babies together sounds pretty horrible, so I probably didn't miss out on anything that great....., as well as avoiding a lot of misery and a divorce.. or two... You make a particularly good point about how some women become attached, to the point of unwanted intrusion, with their adult children, usually after a divorce, where the woman retreats to her family for comfort and validation of her worth as a person, instead of seeking competent therapy, to deal with her loss and grief from the divorce. And then later, when they enter the dating game, they are still so overly attached to their family, and also wanting to avoid disappointment and hurt again, from another man in their life, that they project themselves into the online dating world with profiles that practically shout how family-oriented they are, how their family comes first, etc., and in doing so sort of emotionally stiff arm, like in football, any prospective men who encounter them with what seems like an attitude of "I want to find a male companion, but only completely on my own terms, to mainly serve as an escort for me to family visits, and maybe some FWB sex on the side"... Of course, none of them are ever going to admit to this being their attitude towards men and dating, because, in most cases, it may be totally unconscious on their part.

I recently tried a free membership on POF, after a buddy of mine twisted my arm to do it, after he ...

racocn8 comments on Nov 25, 2022:

I wish I had some magic to help you. At this point, you may want to change tactics. Rotate through the dating sites on the hope that others will be there, especially those catering to older women. I don't much endorse this as I believe many older women give up on either sex or men or both. You might...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 26, 2022:

@racocn8 I agree with all of that, and hope I have developed some character and maturity with age and experience, but I don't see myself ever accepting being involuntarily alone. I have too much to offer, still, even at my age, and my last relationship proved that, as far as I'm concerned, even if it cuts no ice with the women on dating sites. And I also have too many years ahead of me, potentially, to just give up on finding someone. It's not like with my father, who was widowed in his early 80s. He knew he didn't have that many years left, so it was easy for him to give up. I have always been happier with someone than alone, so giving up would be, for me, like resigning myself to an early emotional death. Not willing to do it. Part of it also, is probably because I was widowed relatively young, in my late 50s, even tho my wife was much older than me. She inherited a family disease of dementia, and I feel I got cheated out of a much longer marriage with her, because of that disease, so I guess that also motivates me to want to get some more, well-deserved years of happiness and companionship with someone else. You are also so right about competition, Howard. When I was young, I enjoyed competition in sports and other school activities, because it was so much more of a positive thing for youth. It often helped build character in kids, including me, teaching sportsmanship, working hard in practices to achieve performance in competitions, sometimes even teamwork in some sports, etc. But it was never about anything bigger than medals, trophies, or recognition with others. But competition among adults, like we have in America, for things that are much more important, and often crucial to survival, or at least happiness, like jobs, money, mates, and power, are a whole other thing than youth sports. And our culture of hyper individualism doesn't help either. Competition in our brutal capitalist society, instead brings out the worst of our character, and that is why once I became an adult, I lost all of my taste for competition and quickly embraced socialism in my politics, because it was instead more about cooperation and the welfare of everybody, not just yourself. The dating game is brutal, esp. online dating, as far as competition, and I have to wonder if it would possibly somewhat better in a socialist society, where money and status are not quite so all important as they are in the American dating game, at least among many women regarding what men they choose to date and partner with, should the society be one where most people are on the same level as far as status and money. I know that I would probably do better in the dating game there, and also probably be way happier as a citizen, because I would have actual, effective representation in ...

I recently tried a free membership on POF, after a buddy of mine twisted my arm to do it, after he ...

racocn8 comments on Nov 25, 2022:

I wish I had some magic to help you. At this point, you may want to change tactics. Rotate through the dating sites on the hope that others will be there, especially those catering to older women. I don't much endorse this as I believe many older women give up on either sex or men or both. You might...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 26, 2022:

I have heard many times, from different online sources, that many or most women over 50 have lost interest in dating, because by that age they are no longer interested in taking care of anyone, after raising their kids, being married, and then either losing their partner thru death or divorce, so they decide to not date at all the rest of their life or have another partner in their life. A lot of the time, that probably is also reinforced by them having had bad experiences early on with trying to date again late in life. But the problem is that so many women in my age group that are single just cynically assume that all single men my age are seeking a woman to take care of them, from men seeking a "nurse with a purse", to men who are emotionally stunted or relationship-impaired, who expect the woman to do all the emotional work in the relationship or fill all the gaps in their social and emotional life. I am not like any of those men in those negative qualities, but it doesn't matter, as long as so many single women my age just assume the worst about all of us men their age, and just decide to go it alone or reject all men for dating because of their risk averse fears of being used, mistreated, etc. So that leaves the few good men in the dating game left to deal with overwhelming competition for a relatively small population of women still in the game, and those men must also overcome all the cynicism of the women based on their dysfunctional, predatory brothers, as well as compete against the deception and competitive advantages of other men who have better looks and more money than them, which often result in women choosing those other men over them, despite those men being much worse at doing relationships successfully.

Wart hogs fill an important ecological niche. War dogs leave your economy tits up in a ditch.

DharmaBum50 comments on Nov 26, 2022:

Following up on Lorajay and HippieChick58's comments, the late historian Chalmers Johnson outlined the effects of the American version of imperialism -- our military bases around the world -- in a trilogy of books called *The Blowback Series*. In the final volume, *Nemesis*, he makes this uncannily...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 26, 2022:

@DharmaBum50 That's the thing, the Dems support the ruling class over us peasants, as well as empire, the MIC, endless wars, erosion of civil liberties, corporate control of government and media, but at the same time, they want to maintain the charade of elections and democracy, because they prefer to keep order and relative peace in this country. While the Repubs, under Trumpism, have thrown out all pretense of keeping democracy and rule of law, they just want civil war, followed by a dictatorship that will eliminate them needing to win elections, follow any laws or respect the rule of law, and hold power permanently, even if they are always a minority of the population. And the Repubs will openly have the ruling class running everything, and everyone else will be openly treated like serfs, while any dissenters or despised groups will be imprisoned or lose all of their rights as citizens.

Wart hogs fill an important ecological niche. War dogs leave your economy tits up in a ditch.

DharmaBum50 comments on Nov 26, 2022:

Following up on Lorajay and HippieChick58's comments, the late historian Chalmers Johnson outlined the effects of the American version of imperialism -- our military bases around the world -- in a trilogy of books called *The Blowback Series*. In the final volume, *Nemesis*, he makes this uncannily...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 26, 2022:

My guess is we won't. I can't see the comments of the two women you mentioned, as they both blocked me long ago, so I can't comment on what they said. Eisnehower said it long ago, that the MIC steals money from providing for the public good and needs of average people, but it makes a small number of people very rich, and the pols in DC are too bought off to change the system. So we'll always get empire and the MIC, no matter which major party controls DC.

I recently tried a free membership on POF, after a buddy of mine twisted my arm to do it, after he ...

DenoPenno comments on Nov 25, 2022:

I was on POF before and they kicked me off. Someone decided that all I was trying to do was get laid. I tried the site again later with the same results. They want an expanded profile but it is hard for me to lie and claim I like walks on the beach. I live in Missouri.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 25, 2022:

I'm not surprised. It was the worst site I had ever tried. Even worse than Our Time, and that's saying something.

I recently tried a free membership on POF, after a buddy of mine twisted my arm to do it, after he ...

racocn8 comments on Nov 25, 2022:

I wish I had some magic to help you. At this point, you may want to change tactics. Rotate through the dating sites on the hope that others will be there, especially those catering to older women. I don't much endorse this as I believe many older women give up on either sex or men or both. You might...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 25, 2022:

Already on meds, not going to try acid. Not going to travel either, as I hate to go alone and also it is the highest form of Covid risk these days... Or I could do what another male member here, I won't say who, in order to spare him embarrassment, admitted to me that he did. Namely, blow my money on five different dating sites at once. No way, I get enough rejection as it is on one of them, I don't need to compound it. Besides, most of the same women are on most of them, since the sites always need more women, so they cater to them and offer them free memberships with features the men probably don't get for free. No wonder so many of them are on multiple sites. And you are right, our society does a shitty job of serving singles, but that's because nowadays it's all about profit, rather than a quality service or product, and the consolidation in the industry eliminated the need for them to provide a quality service or product for singles. In the old days, singles could simply go to a bar and find all the other singles, or, for those who didn't drink or found the singles bars too crass or sleazy, there were the singles dances and singles groups. But nowadays, as you commented elsewhere, those end up being too humiliating and lopsided with men these days. So that leaves nothing but online dating, high-priced matchmaking services, which are usually a scam, and dance groups. The latter are fine for those who are good at dancing something organized or skillful, like ballroom or square dancing, but poor for those who are simply there to find someone to date and are not really into dancing for itself. But they are the one arena where women outnumber men in the singles game. Too bad the women there are not flexible enough to venture out of their comfort zone more and try other meeting venues than dance groups, because men shouldn't have to always be the ones moving around to chase the women where they want to meet at. I also agree that it seems like most women over 50 who are single have given up on dating, sex, and men, or at least one of those three. So that is why the dating sites are so lopsided with men. That leaves the women who are still in the game with a huge numbers edge, so they become even more demanding and picky over who they will choose to date from the site. Which means, sadly, that if you are average looking, you had better be very wealthy, and maybe also open to playing Sugar Daddy to someone, or settle for dating someone who is clearly below average looking. I'm not willing to do either one, and I'm not rich enough to be a Sugar Daddy, even if I was willing to do it.

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty I was not trying to mentally spank you, but my point stands that, based on my experiences with these boards, everything I said about how it would all play out, with a woman complaining about her weight, a man weighing in with advice and suggestions, etc., would then result in him being attacked, accused of mainsplaining or worse, and then her feeling insulted. Just because someone complains here, does not mean they want or need advice and suggestions. None of us know each other well enough, compared to our close, offline friends to be qualified to offer it. If the person complaining clearly has no offline friends in their life, or says that is the case, then the Agnostic community might feel qualified, or at least justified, to offer their advice and suggestions unsolicited. You may not have followed me for very long on Agnostic, but if you had, you would notice that, unlike most people here, I do not offer unsolicited advice or suggestions to other members that I don't know from anywhere but here, at least not with any seriousness, rather than jokingly. What I do offer, which I am qualified for, as an empathetic human being, is my honest feelings on what they have shared, and what my personal experiences are, if any, related to the situation they are sharing about. I do not tell them what to do to change their situation or even to change their feelings about it. I am not their therapist or life coach. I try to simply exercise as much humility and empathy as I can, about what I would want from others here when I or they, put themselves out here for judgement or comment on ourselves and our lives. And I notice these days that very few people are still willing to do that on Agnostic. It makes one ask the obvious ?, of wondering why that is these days? And I think the answer is obviously clear, it's about how they feel treated by most other members here, which is either being ignored, as I usually am, or being judged negatively, blamed, and attacked by others, and then blocked for defending myself after being attacked. We should all be humble enough to not offer advice and suggestions unsolicited to strangers on a website, unless they openly ask for it. And anyone who actually knows me or follows me on here, knows that I am quite capable of asking for what I want from others, and that I do so openly.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

racocn8 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

30 some years ago, I went to a Halloween party for singles at one of the member's house. When I got there, I saw about 15 men and NO women. After an hour, one lady showed up, but after seeing the extreme imbalance, she left about 20 minutes later (basically, as soon as she could manage an exit).

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

It's kind of pathetic, Howard, that you and me are about the only people left on this site that are willing to honestly share about our own personal experiences with the dating game, instead of just sharing factless opinions on the subject, offering unsolicited advice and suggestions for the person who is actively playing the game and suffering, and instead putting most or all the blame or fault for their dating woes on the person who is sharing. It is also nice to hear someone else who is personally aware of and honest about how stacked the dating game is against most average guys in America these days, despite their personal characteristics that may be generally positive, their overall relationship track record, and their personal behavior towards women in the dating game. Albert Schepis also gets this, but he has left these boards, so it's just you and me, pal...

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty I know you mean well, Betty, but please no suggestions or advice. I have gotten so much of that on here and am sick of it. Those offering it usually have no idea what I already have or haven't tried, and they are blindly throwing it at me, with no personal knowledge of what I have been thru. I find it condescending and actually very rude, tho I am not taking it that way in your case, because I know your intentions. But with most others, it is simply virtue signaling on their part and a way to not feel guilty because their situation, relationship-wise, is better than mine. How would you have any idea if I am trying too hard or not? Have you ever read my Match profile or any of my messaging to women? You haven't, so you are making a wild guess. I have discussed this subject ad nauseum with my close friends, who know me way better than anyone on this site, and they agree with me that, since I am such an outlier for my local dating pool, that taking a break, as you put it, from online dating, would be foolish, because it would then be quite possible that I would miss out on connecting with that rare unicorn, someone compatible with me, that only rarely joins my local online dating pool. It is a numbers game, Betty, and I can't afford to miss any rare chances that might come up. Also, as a fellow non-believer, you should realize that the whole " they show up right after you stop looking" thing, is magical thinking and a cliche, something we should all be too smart to fall for or believe. Maybe there are other factors in my situation, which you are not aware of, such as a high ratio of men to women in my local online dating pool, or the fact that very few new women have joined my local pool in the last couple months. So, always take a look at the objective, obvious facts, before making assumptions about me and my dating behavior. I am not trying to be insulting, Betty, but whenever someone ignores the objective facts and instead makes a reflexive and uninformed assumption about me, putting the blame on me for my dating woes, it frustrates me. Here's an empathy exercise you might find interesting. How would you, as as woman, feel for example, if you talked about how you are not able to lose the amount of weight you wanted to lose, and I, meaning well, started giving you a whole bunch of advice and suggestions about how I managed to do it, without having any idea of your medical history, eating habits, etc.? I think you, and every other woman here who read it, would feel insulted or offended, and I would be quickly attacked as an insensitive, misogynistic male. So think about that a bit, and then you might understand how the constant, blaming advice and suggestions, make me feel here.

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty That is how I took it. It is comforting, but unfortunately, it changes nothing for me in the dating game. I will keep trying, even tho I have little hope or optimism left. But my will to not be alone the rest of my life is, for now at least, greater than my desire to give up. I was very happy in the first 16 good years with my wife, before she got dementia. I want that kind of happiness again with a partner, which I have never had, before or after I was with her. So, facing another 20-25 years left for me, I sure as hell would rather be with someone good than alone. She told me early on, that I really seemed to like being married, unlike her first two hubbies, so I guess that proves that I am just one of those rare men that is really cut out for LTR monogamy, unlike most men, so it's so very fucking frustrating to realize I may never get the chance again, with the way the dating game is playing out for me.

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty Thanks, but I know that and so do my local friends. It's nice to hear it, but it doesn't really do me any good in the dating game. Ends up feeling more like the usual Thoughts And Prayers after each mass shooting. I wish someone who could actually help me find a woman felt that way about me. And I am a nice person, in spite of the many women here on Agnostic who have blocked me, simply because I was honest about my dating woes and pointed out some uncomfortable truths about women in online dating, that they were unwilling to hear or admit. It gets so fucking old and frustrating to deal with all that bullshit, both in the dating game and here on Agnostic, where both men and women are usually unwilling to be honest about the faults of both genders in the battle of the sexes and the dating game. I have never reflexively defended or refused to admit the faults of other men in the dating game, but boy, have I run across so many women here on Agnostic who refuse to admit bad behavior exists among women in the dating game, and when a man shares about that honestly on here, they are so quick and predictable in how they reflexively blame the man and defend the sisterhood to the death. So I am tired of that double standard on the Agnostic boards..

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty Guess so. Oh well, another possibly compatible woman I will never get to meet or date. The story of my life, since I became widowed five years ago and entered online dating hell.. It's funny you are my age and live not that far from where my wife grew up, Buffalo, NY. Not surprising that you and her are more my type, rather than these Iowa farmer's daughter types that I am so horribly mismatched with in my local dating pool. I am close to resigning myself to being undateable here, unless I get very lucky and connect with some transplanted woman to Iowa, like my late wife was, because then I might finally find compatibility again.

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty No idea, hard to tell just from what someone posts, that is, unless they start sharing person ifo, which I haven't seen you do. I am 64, are you anywhere near that?

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

CuddyCruiser comments on Nov 24, 2022:

This guy should get his dick extracted.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty I so wish you were my age, lived in my area, and were interested in dating. You are a cool lady.

Christian hate-preacher celebrates Club Q shooting: "It's a good thing"

Betty comments on Nov 24, 2022:

Why is it not considered hate speech when preachers, ministers, priests, and pastors etc. spew this kind of hatred?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 24, 2022:

@Betty Not in the US, mainly in Europe, where they are more civilized than us, have less corrupt governments, and thus, sensible gun control laws.

Pastor behind 'Miracle Mansion,' a Christian theme park, convicted of fraud

freedom41 comments on Nov 23, 2022:

Put him in the same cell as Crissly.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 23, 2022:

You mean that asshole Crisley from the reality TV show, Crisley Knows Best? Another phony bored again Christian asshole and con artist, same as the pastor...

TSA found a stowaway cat in checked bag at JFK Airport - The Washington Post

glennlab comments on Nov 23, 2022:

Cat had the travel bug, plus it was warm and cozy.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 23, 2022:

@glennlab Good point. I forgot how cold it can get outside an airplane high up there and how cargo is not climate controlled.

TSA found a stowaway cat in checked bag at JFK Airport - The Washington Post

glennlab comments on Nov 23, 2022:

Cat had the travel bug, plus it was warm and cozy.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 23, 2022:

Curiosity may have almost killed this cat, by suffocation...

Bill Barr recently said that given the choice between Trump (EVEN with Trump's acts of sedition) and...

DenoPenno comments on Nov 21, 2022:

I don't know what drives people like Barr. I just don't get it. On the other hand people miss the fact that Trump ran as a Republican because Hilary was running as a Democrat. Let that sink in a moment. Also note that it takes both parties to give us the candidates.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 22, 2022:

Both parties give us the same kind of corrupt, pre-selected candidates, chosen by the rich and corporations, that they know will serve those groups, rather than the voters, that is why there is not much difference in policy between presidents of either party, except for ID politics and culture war stuff.

New look for the house majority

racocn8 comments on Nov 20, 2022:

They are still BFF with the FBI. The traitor Wray is STILL in charge even after helping Trump's coup. Along with Charles Flynn (brother to Michael) and bunches of others. And DeJoy, And...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 21, 2022:

@racocn8 I don't attribute it to poor judgement, I think Biden was simply doing what he intended to all along, when he said, "Nothing will fundamentally change", to a private meeting of rich donors, during the Dem primaries. How hard is it to believe someone when they tell you honestly who they are and what their plans are? The wasted 15 months of bogus, illusions of bipartisanship were simply Biden posturing and providing himself cover for not delivering on any of his campaign promises made publicly to voters, same as him pretending to trust Manchin and Sinema, his co-conspirators and fellow phonies, who took the blame for him, by blocking things Biden was never behind in the first place and never supported. Biden needs to go as the nominee, and anybody would be better than him. As Lily Tomlin used to say, " You can never be cynical enough. I keep trying and trying, but I just can't keep up with how cynical it takes to see what is going on", or something like that.. My prediction for 2024, is that if the DNC is corrupt and stupid enough to run Biden or Harris as the nominee, we will get DeSantis for prez in two years, Dog help us....

Changes I'd like to see:

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 20, 2022:

Because almost everyone in congress is owned by the oligarchs who run those companies, and also because almost everyone in congress long ago quit caring about anything but themselves, their spouses, and their children getting rich off their power, influence, and contacts in congress, both during and...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 21, 2022:

@LucyLoohoo Only if the majority of voters keep supporting the duopoly, instead of collectively waking up and throwing out both major parties. You might want to start listening to some classic Bob Marley, as in his lyric, "Emancipate yourselves, from mental slavery"... Best definition ever of the herd sticking with voting only within the duopoly.... To me, the truly most wasted vote is voting, knowingly, for someone and something, that you no longer believe in or support, knowing you will never get what you want from that candidate, and kidding yourself that it will make any difference. Better to either not vote at all or vote for what you actually want, even if you don't get it.

Mass shooting at gay nightclub in Colorado Springs - Los Angeles Times

freedom41 comments on Nov 21, 2022:

It's really sad that happened and hopefully it won't happen again.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 21, 2022:

It will, and the only ? is when, how soon..

New look for the house majority

racocn8 comments on Nov 20, 2022:

They are still BFF with the FBI. The traitor Wray is STILL in charge even after helping Trump's coup. Along with Charles Flynn (brother to Michael) and bunches of others. And DeJoy, And...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 20, 2022:

Don't forget to give Biden his deserved blame for leaving all those Trump appointees in place, but that's not so much a lack of spine in Biden, it's the fact that he's really more of a DINO Repub than a Dem, and always has been....

Mass shooting at gay nightclub in Colorado Springs - Los Angeles Times

DenoPenno comments on Nov 20, 2022:

If we get angry enough maybe we can shoot the gay away. Or maybe this guy just wants to be housed and fed the rest of his life. Don't like gay. Guess what will happen to you in prison. If it comes as a big surprise he may have been home schooled and kept in a closet.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 20, 2022:

Pretty likely.. Seems like most of these nimrods, like Rittenhouse, are home-schooled, filled with ignorance and hate of The Other.. and usually also armed and trained to use guns... The Middle East has its training schools for hating the West and America, while we have our own American Taliban system with the right wing here, indoctrinating our young men to hate all who aren't white, Christian, and straight people. Why should we be surprised that it produces our own homegrown terrorists and mass shooters?

Catholic-owned gelato shop in AL bans phones, cursing, and bare shoulders

Beowulfsfriend comments on Nov 19, 2022:

The new catholics, the rick Santorum catholics, are just evangelical loons who, sort of, follow the pope (or mary (.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 19, 2022:

They are starting to remind me of the group of cardinals in the Monty Python sketch, The Spanish Inquisition, where they claimed to have ".... A fanatical devotion to the Pope!".....

Oh god, It's my ex- ...

Flyingsaucesir comments on Nov 19, 2022:

On the Republican balance sheet Trumpty Dumpty is now listed in the column marked "liabilities."

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 19, 2022:

It only took six years, an insurrection, two impeachments, and many criminal and civil litigations against him, for them to dump him..

Gov.

Sierra4 comments on Nov 18, 2022:

....and he campaigned as a moderate, sane republican.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 19, 2022:

So what else is new? Repubs lie all the time during campaigns, and then some more after they get elected..

Early Announcement: We celebrate my heart attack and consequent quadruple bypass surgery in exactly...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 16, 2022:

Very impressive that you survived and recovered. Happy you are alive and hanging in there, hope you have many more good years. A male friend of mine survived a bypass of five arteries, not just four, how he made it, I will never know, but I saw him before he went for the surgery and he was in pretty...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 17, 2022:

@Spinliesel Sounds like a great philosophy.

Not quite sure how to react to this .

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 15, 2022:

WTF? Why did you have to tell us about this? I really hate you, man Glad all of you got the joke...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 16, 2022:

@Flyingsaucesir Hard pass..

How the Democrats Messed Up. What They Can Do Now. | Ted Rall's Rallblog

rainmanjr comments on Nov 15, 2022:

Dems won almost every contest of importance. We lost only one Governor's race but gained two.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2022:

Maybe where you live, but in Iowa, the Repubs won almost everything, as far as statewide races. And the one Dem that won only got by with a 1% margin. We are a one party state here, just as red as Alabama or Mississippi, so I call bullshit and fail to share your rosy assessment.

Tuesday morning cuteness

OldGoat43 comments on Nov 15, 2022:

The look of a Norwegian Forest Cat on the prowl.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 15, 2022:

My former neighbor next door had a Norwegian Forest cat, so cute and three layers of fur.

Jack the 'Baboon' Signalman - True Story Jack was a properly employed first-class signalman in Cape...

DenoPenno comments on Nov 14, 2022:

I've heard of Jack before. I think they should have given him more beer.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2022:

He was definitely underpaid...

Jack the 'Baboon' Signalman - True Story Jack was a properly employed first-class signalman in Cape...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 14, 2022:

Doesn't surprise me. There are probably lots of jobs that could be done by a trained monkey. And I have worked with some people who probably had no more or maybe less brains and sense than a monkey..

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2022:

@DenoPenno Actually, I think it was more of a jackass...

Jack the 'Baboon' Signalman - True Story Jack was a properly employed first-class signalman in Cape...

Betty comments on Nov 14, 2022:

We share this planet with some remarkable creatures that deserve respect and consideration. This is just one example.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2022:

Probably why I like most cats more than most people..

Meet Watson. He helps with everything

Spudgun comments on Nov 14, 2022:

This is why I very seldom let my cats in the computer room.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 14, 2022:

They do love to lay on the keyboard..

So poor old @FvckY0u has taken his ball and run off the field of play, all because I played him at ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 13, 2022:

Actually, I have seen both of you in action on the boards here, and I honestly don't think either one of you is superior to the other in honesty, intellect, or knowledge. So if he blocked you, fine for him, but I don't think it makes you superior in any way. I can still view everything said by both ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 13, 2022:

@anglophone So can I. That is why I have been blocked by so many myself. They get angry when they run out of anything to refute what I say, other than using name-calling or personal attacks. Then when I call them out on those things, they then block me. I have myself blocked very few people lately, so I think I must be doing something right and they must be the ones who are thin-skinned and lacking in tolerance and honesty about when they are wrong. And I hear you on the tactic of people side-stepping ?s and bringing up red herrings instead. That is annoying when they do that, or start using personal attacks or name calling to distract from how they won't answer your ?s or arguments, so I call them out on it. That is when they respond by blocking me, because they have been successfully confronted on their games and tactics, and it is embarrassing to them to be exposed in front of everyone on the boards, so they block me...

Cats have 9 lives. You are not a cat...

p-nullifidian comments on Nov 12, 2022:

I seem to remember a recent incident involving an attorney insisting he was not a cat to the judge during a Zoom meeting. 😂

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

@p-nullifidian Thanks, for the video. I am tech retarded and tech phobic enough, that I have never messed with filters, and never would want to. I'm glad it hasn't happened to me.

Somehow I missed this.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Looks like he did no real damage and scored no hits on the royals, but he will get a short jail sentence and a fine, no doubt, anyway...Too bad he was in the UK, instead of America, where this kind of free speech, if you're a right winger, is protected from any real punishment.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

@Buck Wow, aren't we hostile, Buck? As far as I'm concerned, you conservative or Libertarian asshole, you can STFU or block me, I don't give a fuck...Buck...

Cats have 9 lives. You are not a cat...

p-nullifidian comments on Nov 12, 2022:

I seem to remember a recent incident involving an attorney insisting he was not a cat to the judge during a Zoom meeting. 😂

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

Sounds like there may have been some ? of the attorney's competency?

Somehow I missed this.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Looks like he did no real damage and scored no hits on the royals, but he will get a short jail sentence and a fine, no doubt, anyway...Too bad he was in the UK, instead of America, where this kind of free speech, if you're a right winger, is protected from any real punishment.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

@Buck They have in the past if they assaulted or even murdered a person on the left...

Somehow I missed this.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Looks like he did no real damage and scored no hits on the royals, but he will get a short jail sentence and a fine, no doubt, anyway...Too bad he was in the UK, instead of America, where this kind of free speech, if you're a right winger, is protected from any real punishment.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

@Buck I agree he would have been charged here too, but only because he was a left winger. We both know that here, right wingers can get away with anything.

Remembering my good sister

twill comments on Nov 11, 2022:

She looks just like you, minus the massive jugs

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

Sorry, but her face and head don't look real, more like a CGI.. For all I know, the rest could be that too...

Remembering my good sister

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Are you implying she is dead?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 12, 2022:

@Avva Well, that's good..

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

racocn8 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

30 some years ago, I went to a Halloween party for singles at one of the member's house. When I got there, I saw about 15 men and NO women. After an hour, one lady showed up, but after seeing the extreme imbalance, she left about 20 minutes later (basically, as soon as she could manage an exit).

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 10, 2022:

@racocn8 That's a whole new, disgusting version of the term "rat race". Very good analogy for the dating and mating game with many humans. While there is plenty of bad behavior by women in the dating game, such as lying, manipulation, gold-digging, etc., there are also plenty of men who are just out there in the game for the ego trip and scoring as many conquests as they can, etc. But they tend to be a relatively small % of men, because most women will only sleep with them if they have a lot of money or are 8s or 9s in looks. And not that big a % of men fall into either group, compared to how many women of any level of looks, are capable of the bad behaviors I listed above. So there is little evidence to support men as being worse or more commonly, badly behaved in the dating and mating game.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

MichelleGar1 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

I could only take 5 minutes or less from the dating option on Facebook, it was too scary for me and overwhelming!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 10, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 Well, for me Zoosk is a shitshow because of the tech level and tech savvy they require, but I've heard Match and the others have just as much of the bullshit and bad behavior by both genders of members on the sites. As far as online dating being harder than organic, offline meeting of compatible singles, I would say yes and no about it. Organic offline dating may offer more protection against safety risks, esp. for women, than online dating, but even still, some people can fool even your friends and acquaintances from being able to effectively screen for you who is compatible or even safe and sane, if the person is a charming, smooth sociopath. As far as online dating, the difficulty in that, esp. for men, who have way more competition than most women on dating sites, at least in the US, is that in organic dating, meeting singles offline thru social networks or events, a person only has to meet the other single person's basic, minimum standards of compatibility, and vice versa. In online dating, each person must not only meet those for the other person, but they must also "win" or be chosen, against all the other competition on the dating site at that time, in order for them to actually get to begin dating and keep dating the other person steadily. In other words, with online dating, being compatible, but not the top prospect, is close, but not good enough, in that game...

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

racocn8 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

30 some years ago, I went to a Halloween party for singles at one of the member's house. When I got there, I saw about 15 men and NO women. After an hour, one lady showed up, but after seeing the extreme imbalance, she left about 20 minutes later (basically, as soon as she could manage an exit).

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

@racocn8 It is ridiculous, and very humiliating, at least for the men, if not for some of the women, being so openly "fought over" by the men there. But then again, there were no doubt some women who got off on it and enjoyed an ego trip by being competed for and having so much male attention. I have long thought that this sort of thing also goes on with online dating, that there are some women with insecure egos and a huge appetite for male attention and ego strokes, that go on dating sites, with no real interest or desire to actually date or find a partner, but just to soak in all the male attention and interest from men messaging them and maybe even meeting them, but then not end up dating any of them, just wanting to feel wanted and desireable. So before I get the usual bashing about how there must be men doing the same thing, I will make the usual, obvious unneeded disclaimer: It goes both ways, we all know that. But I will also say that it's also pretty clear that this likely happens way more often by women on dating sites than by men, if for no other reason that on dating sites, men do almost all the sending of first messages and the pursuing, while women sit back and let the men message them first. So it makes no logical sense that a man would bother to put in all that work, time and effort to message tons of women, just to get some ego stroke and attention. And if they did, they would need lots of free time, that could probably be used way more efficiently by just going to the gym or some public place, to get some quick female attention from the women admiring their looks.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

racocn8 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

30 some years ago, I went to a Halloween party for singles at one of the member's house. When I got there, I saw about 15 men and NO women. After an hour, one lady showed up, but after seeing the extreme imbalance, she left about 20 minutes later (basically, as soon as she could manage an exit).

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

Another thing, Howard, about five years ago, right after my late wife died, when I was finally in a position to start dating again, the local Unitarian church's singles group, which would have been the logical best place for me to start finding compatible women to date, disbanded. Talk about lousy timing for me! But it wouldn't have helped me anyway, as I found out from the woman my age who was single and the leader of the group. She told me the reason it disbanded is because it was almost all men by that time and that, in my age group of women that were members of the group, 50 to 70 years old or so, none of the single women in the church had any interest in dating, they were all choosing to go it alone and stay single. I think that trend is very common or prevalent these days among women in that age group, compared to men in that age group, and it is not going to ever change for the better, at least not towards getting any better for men wanting to find a partner.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

MichelleGar1 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

I could only take 5 minutes or less from the dating option on Facebook, it was too scary for me and overwhelming!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

@Sierra4 Heard about it, haven't tried it. I think this trend of lopsided gender ratios probably is present in about all the dating sites and apps, at least for my local area, if not across the country. I think most of us saw the study posted here on Agnostic, saying that 62% of the singles on dating sites in America are men, so that is a 2 to 1 ratio already, and then it will be much worse in certain geo areas. As a side note, I tried to use Zoosk today, and it was a disaster. My laptop and browser are probably too old for their site and when I kept trying to sign up or log in using FB or Google, it kept being rejected. Match is much simpler and user friendly for older, tech-retarded people like me. I called Zoosk's tech support and they said I would need to have a friend help me set up an account with them, because it would take too much time for them to help me on the phone, and then call them back again to purchase a membership. Too much fucking work and trouble for me to bother with, altho it does appear their membership fees are significantly less than Match, but who knows what their membership numbers are for my local area and what the gender ratios are? I have no way of knowing until I set up and account and browse. It's such shit that all dating sites require you to set up an account, and usually a profile, before you can even browse the profiles in you local area.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

racocn8 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

30 some years ago, I went to a Halloween party for singles at one of the member's house. When I got there, I saw about 15 men and NO women. After an hour, one lady showed up, but after seeing the extreme imbalance, she left about 20 minutes later (basically, as soon as she could manage an exit).

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

I think it has gotten to that point with online dating sites, that most of them have way more men on them than women, at least in my age group and in my area. And nothing will be done about it by Match or any other dating site, no matter how much I complain to their customer care staff, because they don't make money by actually helping people find partners and quit needing their services. All they care about is maintaining enough public credibility and antectdotal success stories for people to keep signing up and paying for memberships. They could easily do things to make the gender ratios more balanced, like advertising more for their sites on venues or platforms that appeal to women, like TV shows mainly watched by women, but they have no incentive to spend money on doing that, as long as enough people keep paying for memberships and signing up, be they male or female. Really sucks and makes me justifiably angry with their greed and indifference to the plight of their male members. As to your Halloween singles party experience, I went to a singles dance a few years ago, and, while there were seemingly more women there than men, it was still a disaster, as about all the women there were attending in groups, maybe for moral support or whatever, so they all knew each other from attending the same church's divorce support group, or otherwise a church singles group, etc.. Anyway, few of them seemed at all attractive looking to me (and my standards are not that high, a 5 or 6 on the ten scale would be fine for me), and it also appeared that most of them were not that excited about or interested in meeting men for dating. It seemed like most of them were along for the ride to spend time with the other women and just get a night out with female company and dance. BTW, I have also checked out the local dance club that is favored by single women my age, and it's the same way, mostly women who are just there to dance and hang with their friends, not really interested in meeting men there to date, contrary to all the conventional wisdom about Boomer age women and dance clubs.. The few women I talked to at the singles dance, also confirmed my suspicions about how mismatched I was with them as far as being compatible dating partners, as they all were members of Christian or Catholic churches, and much more mainstream and traditional than me on lifestyle and culture, same as what I encounter all the time on Match: Being very family and kid-oriented, into country music big time, politically conservative, big social drinkers, moderately or more religious and not willing to date a non-believer, etc.

Has anybody else noticed any changes in the trends as far as online dating?

MichelleGar1 comments on Nov 9, 2022:

I could only take 5 minutes or less from the dating option on Facebook, it was too scary for me and overwhelming!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

I've been told by a woman my age who is a single friend, to check out the FB dating site or app, but it wouldn't do me any good, since it appears to require a smartphone to be able to use it, and I am not interested in getting one. I would otherwise not need one. Your comment just makes me feel even more strong about not wanting to bother with the FB dating option.

Some sad news for Agnostics Members….

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 9, 2022:

What did he die from?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 9, 2022:

@Marionville That pretty well explains it. Thanks for the info.

Some sad news for Agnostics Members….

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 8, 2022:

So sorry to hear that. She is a great cat lover and has shared many cute photos of her cats, which I really enjoyed.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2022:

@Marionville Thank you.

Anti-bullying is just bullying the bullies. And I wouldn't ever stand for that.

KKGator comments on Nov 8, 2022:

Sometimes, you have to fight fire with fire. Sometimes, it's not the best course of action.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 8, 2022:

Yup, it all depends on the likelihood of winning the fight.

Yesterday I found need to go to a laundrymat.

silverotter11 comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Fear changed the landscape. The further Americans go down the rabbit hole of fear mongering, lies and bullshit I hear and see from the far right the more like an authoritarian nation we will become. It was always racist around here but it really started to be more open when trump was put in the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 6, 2022:

Americans are becoming more and more socially isolated and atomized. This is not a good thing, not only politically, but it also plays into the hands of the corporate media and the corporate rule of our economics. People who fear each other and don't trust each other, are the last ones who will risk anything to start a union or organize to push back against the class war that has been waged against them, one-sided, for decades..

Kroger to pay $180K for firing Christians who wouldn't wear heart symbol

glennlab comments on Nov 5, 2022:

I think Kroger did a cost of litigation analysis and made an off, they did not reinstate the workers or admit fault. No judgment, no appeal.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 5, 2022:

Typical corporate bullshit, the usual playbook...

lol we had a Yorkie and my one cat would wait till she walked by and then dash and tackle her.

Zster comments on Nov 5, 2022:

A sweet cat that I acquired ended up being a dog hater. He LOVES when my mom brings her chihuahua to visit. Hide, ambush, and ride (hanging on to its back with all claws)!

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 5, 2022:

Some cats can be very sneaky and mean to dogs...

Truth is stranger than fiction.

rainmanjr comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Civil disobedience on a mass scale is what's called for. Especially if Dems lose this election.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 5, 2022:

@Flyingsaucesir I wish you were right, but I don't think we're going to have time to do that, even if the Dems had the political will, which they clearly don't. If the Repubs take control of both houses in DC, which I think they will, the descent into fascism will be too rapid to stop, as in two years the Repubs will also take the WH, and the dictatorship will be complete and very quickly implemented. You are too optimistic about our system.. I also don't think civil war can be prevented, and it may as well happen sooner than a few years later, let's get it over with and hope we win, which is doubtful also...

Truth is stranger than fiction.

rainmanjr comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Civil disobedience on a mass scale is what's called for. Especially if Dems lose this election.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 5, 2022:

@Flyingsaucesir Once they start to go Kosovo on us and begin hunting us in armed militias, will you then be ready to give up on your high road rules, arm yourself, and start shooting back at them in the streets when they come for you? Or will you still trust in cops and the military being honorable and protecting you? Asking for a friend, lol....

Is church decline something to celebrate? That depends [onlysky.media]

HankSherman comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Since you asked......I know of none that do more good than harm....teaching altruism, and looking forward to life after death, is evil

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 4, 2022:

Teaching altruism is a good thing, as far as I'm concerned, esp. in our toxic culture in America of hyper individualism, greed, and selfishness. What are you, some Libertarian or conservative? If so, that explains a lot about how you are against altruism. It's the lack of it that is leading us to civil war soon, as well as destroying our country for decades, among other reasons.

Christian hate-preacher: Abortion doctors must be mutilated and murdered

vocaloldfart comments on Nov 3, 2022:

What gives the psychotic rabble the right to rule a womans body? Will these creatures financially support the children born that would have been aborted? will they raise them?? Abortion is not a procedure taken without good emotional and pressing reasons. If anything should be burned it is these ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 3, 2022:

Nope their concern for preserving "life" ends at birth, after that, feeding the kids, surviving, paying their costs, is not their concern. The kid and their mother are on their own, as far as the Bible-thumpers are concerned.

Christian hate-preacher: Abortion doctors must be mutilated and murdered

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Why is his clearly serious, sincere hate speech left up on You Tube, when just yesterday FB sent me a nastygram threatening me for having posted a joking meme about shooting Ted Cruz if he came to my door dressed as werewolf, which he was in the meme? They removed my post immediately, even tho I got...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

@Betty It is, but none of that makes it right...

The couple in question almost divorced divorced once before; 620,000 soldiers died.

alliwant comments on Oct 29, 2022:

This would be funny if it was not an existential crisis, but it is. The GOP has retreated from reality because reality has become a litany of doom, and every move they have made to seize and control what is possible just leaves them with fewer options. From Trump, there is no place to go but ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

@alliwant I wish you were right about that. Instead, I see the Repubs taking power for good and eliminating elections, and going full on dictatorship and fascism, game over, no more even the pretense of democracy we have now. You see the Repubs committing suicide, while I see them on the path to total and permanent victory and rule.

Christian hate-preacher: Abortion doctors must be mutilated and murdered

Beowulfsfriend comments on Nov 2, 2022:

"Pro lifer" proving again it isn't about life at all.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

It's all about revenge and domination, very Old Testament...

I received a rather disheartening email today from HAAM (Humanists, Agnostics & Atheists of ...

Fernapple comments on Nov 2, 2022:

All such traditional style organizations have that problem. I earn a large part of my income as a public speaker, and everywhere that I go, clubs and none public institutions are closing down. Few of the young people who work, have the time for them, young people who do not work do not have the ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

I agree with you on all those factors coming into play.

I wish I could go back sometimes.

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 1, 2022:

I can relate to feeling nostalgic for the innocence of that time, but that's about it.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

@phxbillcee Quite true, but then again, at the time, I was straight, white, male, and Catholic, so I was very privileged and yet had no awareness of how much....

It was a weird program to say the least, Seinfeld's comedy is an acquired taste that I never quite ...

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 1, 2022:

I never got into that show too much, as the characters were generally very unlikeable people. Very selfish, often abrasive, not very honest, etc. Not at all the sort of people I would choose or have as friends, so why watch them? Very little kindness was ever practiced on that show. Seemed like ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 2, 2022:

@glennlab I agree and kind of sensed that, because most of the actors went on to do better parts, where they could show more of their skill, after they left that show, particularly Jason Alexander and Julia Louise Dreyfuss..

Barack Obama's Midterm Speech Goes Viral, Plus Paul Pelosi Hammer Attack and Elon Musk Reaction - ...

silverotter11 comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Obama really is fun to watch and listen to. Sure miss him in the WH.

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 1, 2022:

I don't miss him, his wife, or the Clintons. In fact, those four have done more to ruin the Dem Party, for progressives like me and Bernie, than anyone else, along with Uncle Tom Jim Clyburn, besides the Obamas and Clintons...

If you’re looking for good games to play on your Android device, then you’ve come to the right ...

Beowulfsfriend comments on Oct 25, 2022:

Hey! Site and customer service! Isn't this spam?

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 1, 2022:

We appear to be beginning to be overrun by it on the forum categories that are not being moderated anymore. Not a good sign, as far as site maintainence. The spammers appear to have caught on to this.

The real difference between Atheist and religious people

anglophone comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Esther Callejas would disagree. She claims to have shot her two young children because she wanted them to go to heaven: https://lawandcrime.com/crime/arizona-mother-shot-her-two-young-children-because-she-wanted-them-to-go-to-heaven-police/

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 1, 2022:

Well then, there are always the crazy folks. I was presuming this discussion was only including sane people...

If he shows up at my door, I'll shoot him with silver bullets

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Just wanted the community here to know that I tried sharing this on my FB page and within less than an hour, FB had notified me that it violated their policies on content inciting violence and harm, etc., so that no one could see it except me. So I deleted it. You have to wonder if they would have ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 1, 2022:

@glennlab I guess that just shows how chaotic and arbitrary their moderation policies are..

If he shows up at my door, I'll shoot him with silver bullets

TomMcGiverin comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Just wanted the community here to know that I tried sharing this on my FB page and within less than an hour, FB had notified me that it violated their policies on content inciting violence and harm, etc., so that no one could see it except me. So I deleted it. You have to wonder if they would have ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Nov 1, 2022:

@glennlab Well, then that sounds like BS, why did they censor me posting it, but you were able to find it there? It makes no sense, unless they pulled it soon after you got it from there.

What are you for?

FvckY0u comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Another thing that gets me is lets say for the sake of argument that all public offices werre occupied by Democrats and you are for Democrats. What would happen? I don't agree with that group of Dems and I agree with this group, etc. In no time at all you've got 2 or more parties of Dems. You ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 31, 2022:

I honestly don't feel represented by either major party, as a whole, with either one, not after you get past the identity politics and culture war issues. Neither party represents me on the important issues I mentioned in my comment above. The masses will never be truly represented in our federal government until either legalized bribery is ended in our federal elections, or until a third party actually wins control of congress or the WH.

The couple in question almost divorced divorced once before; 620,000 soldiers died.

alliwant comments on Oct 29, 2022:

This would be funny if it was not an existential crisis, but it is. The GOP has retreated from reality because reality has become a litany of doom, and every move they have made to seize and control what is possible just leaves them with fewer options. From Trump, there is no place to go but ...

TomMcGiverin replies on Oct 30, 2022:

The DSA and the Greens are the only parties in the US that actually represent me on policy, but as long as the DSA keeps hitching its wagon to the Dems and expecting they can reform or influence them from within the Dem Party, they will get nowhere, same as Bernie. I really wish the DSA would seriously try to unite with the Greens and give us an actual third party, call it a Justice Party or Workers Party, whatever, and kick the Dems to the curb, the way they have deserved to be for decades..