Elon is already talking about bankruptcy. When you find yourself in a hole,stop digging.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

It should be amusing this next year when he figures out that he lost everything and now has to work at McDonalds ....

Christopher Titus [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

What can you expect from people who are inbred...

What a feeling..... but

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

You're....

Right analogy but...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

.....

Listen, he is very good.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Finding a pet that can save you money is a real feat these days....

For neighbors you don't like...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Should do that with a Chucky doll....

I'm with you, mate. Couldn't possibly miss that delivery. 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Well you are SOL then....

I have a guess. Guys, what say you?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

The scenery?....

Nobody reported this

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

His wife better hurry up and divorce him while he still has money....

Don't eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what: A little boy and a little girl attended the same ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 11, 2022:

Maybe he should have switched to hotdogs instead....

Did you see it?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

Yes... when I was stationed in Tennessee and North Carolina....

A sixteen year-old boy came home with a brand new Ford F150.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

Bad planning he should have sold the truck before he left....

The animals are back, part II!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

#5 is my cat Panther.....

Looking for a job?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

Biggest noodles in town....

That was then

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

Not broken just broke because you cleaned him out....

Unbelievable!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 10, 2022:

I see stupid people... What are the stupid people doing?... They are playing militia trying to keep people from voting in person by threatening them with guns....

A Twitter Love Story

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2022:

All political figures have verified accounts.... But now you can buy one too for only $8 a year...

The billionaire and the mermaid whisperer A billionaire is sailing his yacht past a lighthouse, ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2022:

Ahh in true "tis bottle style" except much much shorter...

So, Hellraiser puzzle cube is a STEM toy.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2022:

At least it may move some people away from ignorant superstitious beliefs in Christ-Insanity....

I will wait...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 9, 2022:

"Jesus’ teaching on prayer (Matthew 6:5-8) Summary Jesus taught, “When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men … but when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your father who is unseen.” Understanding the text Jesus began his teaching on prayer here by saying how not to pray: Don’t show off. Synagogues were places of worship where many people gathered to pray. Jesus spoke against those who prayed loudly just so they could be seen and praised by others. He called such people hypocrites and he probably had in mind the Pharisees. They would even pray loudly in public places too. Don’t use a lot of meaningless words. The Gentiles' prayers were long because they thought this would impress their many gods. Often, they repeated a phrase or a god’s name many times, hoping to attract attention. Jesus said that prayer should be a private time between God and the worshipper. Jesus does not mean that it is wrong to pray with others, but the prayers should be sincere and for the right motives." https://www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/guides/zkw2vk7/revision/2

Especially if the bears are above average.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2022:

Should be a federal law saying that harassing people waiting to vote is treason and carrying a gun while doing so is sedition both punishable by the culprits choice of either exile or firing squad.... Politicians or media personalities who tell people to commit those crimes should just be shot...

There you have it…….

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 8, 2022:

Where is his buddy the pope?...

Thought you would like to know...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 7, 2022:

Pretty soon Elon Musk is going to be working there I hear Twitter is tanking and he owes a fortune on the loans he took out buying it. Now he has a huge class action suit against him as well...

Fun - that's questionable. Please don’t lick the toads [news.yahoo.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 7, 2022:

Only in Arizona are people stupid enough to lick a frog's ass to get high....

Sex education.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 7, 2022:

Virgins teaching sex education is like the blind teaching kids about color...

That's one way to do it...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 7, 2022:

Why not just buy a clock that does it for you?... https://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/store/s/self-setting-clocks

Couldn't be clearer. Thank you. 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 7, 2022:

With my ex it was finished and finished completely....

Not too hard, no pun intended

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Could go either way...

He is thoughtful

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Looks like someone is into lightweight fantasies.....

Not as judgmental as a philly guy seeing what they call a cheesesteak anyplace south of the ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Re: #2 we should replace most of congress with them....

Why did he warn?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

She looks like a vampire...

The pusher

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

He must be the boss....

It's all about the context

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

How religion was invented....

A thought, "Hair today, gone tomorrow."

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Had the same thought when I started having a receding hairline and shaving every day at age 12....

A lawyer comes home after having sex with a girl in his car.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Apparently he likes them dumb and greedy because she didn't wonder why they weren't sealed and marked as evidence...

Who's she? She'll get my house and the boat.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 6, 2022:

Until you find out she is a he and just trying to find the same kind of woman you are....

Sort of a box lunch.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2022:

Last one is the story of my life....

dirty old man busy.... Lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2022:

Nah just your average everyday bondage club is all....

Dangerous voting in the desert.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2022:

Pumpkin spice gas.... The way people are not such a stretch now is it?...

I thought I saw a.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 5, 2022:

Packed his trunk and ran off to pout....

Three happy dudes 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

What a pathetic lifestyle....

One or more applies above 50

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

And the older you get the more apply but they forgot the 8th dwarf... Where the hell is Cranky?...

You have been warned! not really, but it does make my point

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Don't sell yourself short it is exactly like you....

Been there many times. You?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Not going to catch me praying because of something that happens to me all the time...

Look a little closer...... fuckin A

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Fuckin A Skippy....

Ooopppsss! I made a mistake!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 4, 2022:

Well the judge should certianly understand that one...

Anybody good at geometry here?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2022:

Looks like somebody needs to lay off the fried foods...

Not to mention we had the ability to use a map and compass without the aid of a satellite up in the ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2022:

Never needed a compass I always knew which direction I was facing even as a kid I didn't understand how people could get lost I just figured they were idiots. In the scouts I did learn to use one along with a map but generally I considered them a complete waste of time for practical use.

Imagine that...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2022:

Back then the cops didn't hassle you for not having a business license though.

Happy birthday....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 3, 2022:

Seems fitting .... it is even missing the candles.

Home security

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Sending this to a friend from college who is 4' 11" and her fiancé

Which one are you? Be honest.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

*Starts putting together and EMP device for shopping trips...*

A waste of time and space - literally. 😆

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Keeping promises is an important part of any relationship no matter how you keep them...

Fond memories.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

It is an inverse square law it seems....

At least it wasn't the geek.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Charlie Brown's whole crew should have slapped the shit out of Linus....

Repeat after me

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Better than being descended from a family of inbreeders...

I'm a water child!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 2, 2022:

Be careful you don't spring a leak at an embarrassing moment...

Just couple memes I found. Enjoy!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Something about that training camp is wrong.... Could it be the crosses on those walls?... I would think it would be Altar boys studying there...

It's overwhelming

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

First you have to be able to choose the right tool for the job.... For instance knocking sense into a Trumpanzee the tool of choice would be the jackhammer attachment for a very large Cat....

This one is for all our medical professional, but with a special shout out to @pralina1

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

As long as it is the Republican ward its all good...

Not nice Kevin but I could be worse.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

And by the way Kevin you need to take a paternity test....

Let's make easy, not fancy.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Lefty Lucy, Righty Tighty...

A man just found his wife has a Tinder profile and he's furious.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Keep your mouth shut and hope she finds someone then and screenshot the profile so you can file for divorce...

First the copy editor, then the censor.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

If they aren't mature enough to see the word "fucking" in a university textbook what the fuck are they doing in a university anyway?... More importantly what in the fuck are these immature twats printing these books doing printing them?....

Reports - this was hot this year

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

They misspelled shit...

Anybody got trick or treaters? Micky Ds at Halloween!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

First they have to make it through the minefield....

Well...shouldn't be fighting then!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

After you bet on them ending the fight in a draw I hope...

I try to be kind and practice my shut up, but sometimes!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Nov 1, 2022:

Exactly how I feel about it...

Some kinda substitute A?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

The new Jiffy Pop....

Isn't that the question?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Isn't Trump the only one left on Truth social except for informants and FBI agents?...

Concerts, rallies, fairs, festivals... I am out.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Fuck it just whip it out and start pissing I guarantee they will part like the Red Sea...

That's the honest truth...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

I have one and it only cost me $180.00.... Best part is I don't have to worry about it taking off with another guy and cleaning me out in the process.

Do you like poetry? Lol...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Poetry usually comes from the heart butt in her case....

Spooky, sucks to be him

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Actually Blacks are far more likely to be there with their children than Whites especially in the South... Where White kids aren't only unsure of who their father is but often are too sure about their mom...

Watch out boy, she's a man eater!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Is it cougar hunting season yet?.... Because after bagging that I would happily eat it....

People in Brazil did not listen to the duly (un)elected ex president of the only superpower of the ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Straight from the mouth of the bend over baby ex-president who greases his ass for every cheap dictator he runs into....

Has it really come to this???

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Surprised it doesn't say "flush before drinking..."

Typical relationship...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Bearly tolerable relationship.....

Rednecks gotta redneck

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Spent all his winnings on the car and didn't have enough left over for a new trailer....

Christmas Decoration?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Wait until the new Christmas sweaters from China hit Walmart....

New food, they are going to have to research the name though

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Sounds like a real pain in the ass....

Anyone need a memory enhancement?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 31, 2022:

Wife or girlfriend?.....

Joke works best on an acquaintance.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

Reese said to tell you to fork off.....

Accident in the Golf Club A woman playing Golf hit a man nearby… He put his hands together ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

How come I never get a doctor like that?...

Stoners will get this one

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

Why stoners need someone around to make them a sandwich...

Meme dump! Enjoy!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

The first one has to be a Chinese made costume....

This explains why I was so willing to retire.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

Which also explains why corporate America is losing all its best workers....

Well, if you think your Pumpkin effigies are scary take a look at this feckin' weirdo from Portugal!...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

Sometimes I wonder about people.... other times I am sure they have brain farts...

Not even a bit funny, - it does freakin hurt...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

I would have told her to sit on my lap and I would show her...

Not even a bit funny, - it does freakin hurt...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZu9N8qMKjA

The CEO of a large business used took pride in HR development of his subordinates.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 30, 2022:

Stop giving him ideas....

Have a happy Saturday!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 29, 2022:

Re: #6... Or released from either the mental hospital or prison....

Seasonal stuff - starting with a lesser known Frankenstein movie...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 29, 2022:

I love the headstone.....

Not sure if this is the right way...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 29, 2022:

Funny part is how much less they are paying for fuel even if they were using that generator as a regular power source.

Have a sexy Halloween!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 28, 2022:

The one on the left she let a ghost of a fart....

Not all dads are handy

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 28, 2022:

Should have used a coke bottle......

I do appreciate watching a master at work

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 28, 2022:

Ask a stupid question of a overworked minimum wage employee and guess what you get back?....

Found an recipe book

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 27, 2022:

A recipe that will keep you on edge....

Mind expanding? probably not for this guy.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 27, 2022:

Bet there are a lot of guys with hot stepmoms pretending they are deaf...

Comparing great athletes can be hard.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Oct 27, 2022:

And were openly banned from sports... None of this chicken shit denial crap...