What I want on my headstone...

ASTRALMAX comments on Jul 18, 2022:

During a televised interview, Umberto Eco was asked what he would like for his epitaph and he replied: “This is the philosopher’s stone.”

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 18, 2022:

@ASTRALMAX, @phxbillcee Actually Fission works as well as a percentage of the lead used for shielding is transformed into gold. Proton bombardment will do that you know...

What I want on my headstone...

ASTRALMAX comments on Jul 18, 2022:

During a televised interview, Umberto Eco was asked what he would like for his epitaph and he replied: “This is the philosopher’s stone.”

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 18, 2022:

@ASTRALMAX Being a science and history buff I already knew that....

What I want on my headstone...

ASTRALMAX comments on Jul 18, 2022:

During a televised interview, Umberto Eco was asked what he would like for his epitaph and he replied: “This is the philosopher’s stone.”

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 18, 2022:

Or th Barny Stone so your friends all drop by for a piss and everyone else kisses it.....

It is a civil debate

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2022:

Coffee or tea but no pee.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 18, 2022:

@phxbillcee If it happened I have no doubt a tape of it does exist knowing how the Russians operate. The fact that it hasn't appeared means that either it didn't happen or far more likely Putin still thinks the Dumpster may be of some use....

It is a civil debate

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 18, 2022:

Coffee or tea but no pee.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 18, 2022:

@phxbillcee Yeah he would demand diet Coke... How anyone can drink shit like that is beyond me. Any normal person would likely prefer pee to diet Coke.

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey.

Beowulfsfriend comments on Jul 17, 2022:

Reminded me of the guy who walks into the bar with a 12 inch tall man sitting on his shoulder. The man orders a round for the house. After the bartender doles out drinks, the little man jumps off the guy's shoulder, runs down the bar kicking over the drinks. The man just shakes his head and says, ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 17, 2022:

And the moral of the story is: "Be careful what you wish for you might just get it..."

You could be happy

Garban comments on Jul 17, 2022:

Haven’t seen you post in a while. Welcome back!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 17, 2022:

@St-Sinner Hookers keeping you busy are they?....

I would marry him, too. 😆

amymcmxcii comments on Jul 16, 2022:

Great gift! I'd take it. Better than a date who wants you to pay your own way then lend him 20$

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 16, 2022:

Well at least you know how we feel after dates.... Get dressed up, take her to a nice restaurant and all she does is complain about the food after you spent $200.00 between meal and tip.... Of course the next week you hear from your friends about how she is bitching that you didn't call her the next day for a second date...

Unbelievably moronic Texas real estate agents keep calling me to buy a property I don't even own.

of-the-mountain comments on Jul 15, 2022:

Those fuck up assholes text you also!!! What a bunch of brain dead greedy fuck wads!!! I do not own anything of value!!!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

Feel free to record this message on their voice mail.....I figure if they get the same song playing 20 to 30 times a day at them they will likely find another scam. The property they keep bothering me about is on the Historical properties list here as the oldest surviving home in the county and as such they can't develop it or tear it down and the present owner rents it for events anyway at $5,000.00 for a 12 hour day. If I was the owner that would be more money than I receive every month so I would tell them to fuck off anyway.

Unbelievably moronic Texas real estate agents keep calling me to buy a property I don't even own.

MichelleGar1 comments on Jul 15, 2022:

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 Just think the next time Ted Cruz is out campaigning if you have a very loud sound system you can play this for him....

Unbelievably moronic Texas real estate agents keep calling me to buy a property I don't even own.

MichelleGar1 comments on Jul 15, 2022:

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

I am getting tired of trying to explain to these inbred, drooling, gun waving, treason weasel, draftdodgers that they have the wrong number. I block a number and they call or text from another so I figure why not have some fun and let others join in.... If they get flooded with messages that are mostly this song they might just get the idea they might need to start doing a better job.

I always wondered where that sobriquet originated...

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 15, 2022:

Hey look the Texas governor's official hat.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

@zeuser Texas where women are treated with less respect than livestock....

What do you call atheists in India? Naan believers.....I'm sorry

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 15, 2022:

Sorry?... why?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

@OldMetalHead "Joke em if they can't take a fuck" Me

What do you call atheists in India? Naan believers.....I'm sorry

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 15, 2022:

Sorry?... why?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 15, 2022:

@OldMetalHead "Bad puns are the best uns..." Unknown

We're Idiots! | Christopher Titus [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 14, 2022:

I have always said that I suspect that I was kidnapped by an exceptionally retarded alien species for study as a child...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee Yeah that used to piss my mother off no end....

Damn these scammers are getting hard to spot....

PondartIncbendog comments on Jul 14, 2022:

Who believes anyone lives in Ontario?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

USA Ontario Canada yet.... The guy must be from Puntang India where they are more inbred than a Texas Republican...

Damn these scammers are getting hard to spot....

phxbillcee comments on Jul 14, 2022:

I actually haven't seen too many lately...is it something we said?!?!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee At least I could improve the music right?... https://youtu.be/pvhYqeGp_Do

Damn these scammers are getting hard to spot....

phxbillcee comments on Jul 14, 2022:

I actually haven't seen too many lately...is it something we said?!?!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee What makes you think I would neglect shearing the Sheeple for fun and profit?.... I bet they would try and elect me Pope and the thought makes me bilious....

Damn these scammers are getting hard to spot....

phxbillcee comments on Jul 14, 2022:

I actually haven't seen too many lately...is it something we said?!?!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee If I had the scammer mentality I would be very wealthy indeed.... And most of you would be kissing my ass in thanks for robbing you blind.... Something to be thankful for this November...

Damn these scammers are getting hard to spot....

phxbillcee comments on Jul 14, 2022:

I actually haven't seen too many lately...is it something we said?!?!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

If you look at the "Members" grid one seems to pop up about every week or two. I just see the profile picture there and it seems to scream "SCAMMING FUCKWAD" or SHITSTAIN ON THE UNDERWEAR OF LIFE" and sure enough sometimes you get solid gold humor out of it...

Please be careful how you judge.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 14, 2022:

In the Disc World series Witches are actually women who do good without expectation of financial reward.... and yes they do ride brooms, dress in all black and even wear heavy shoes or boots built to last instead of for style... Well there were two exceptions though.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee I have so little else to spend money on and I still manage to put a bit away each month.

Please be careful how you judge.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 14, 2022:

In the Disc World series Witches are actually women who do good without expectation of financial reward.... and yes they do ride brooms, dress in all black and even wear heavy shoes or boots built to last instead of for style... Well there were two exceptions though.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@phxbillcee One of the few of his I haven't read yet I am only buying first edition hardcovers in prime condition for my library. My granddaughter is going to have a beautiful library when she inherits. Did you know there are about 50 books in the Disc World series alone?

I know there are a lot of you guilty of this also.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 14, 2022:

Actually I deliver joke deadpan and drive people crazy when they think I am being serious.... NOW THAT cracks me up...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 14, 2022:

@glennlab Try telling "The Tis Bottle" joke for over two hours and finally give the punchline with a straight face to see just how long it takes them to figure out you have been giving them cliffhanger after cliffhanger the whole time only to deliver the world's most intelligence insulting punchline... I like to see how far I can walk into a head start so they can't beat me to death.... Well when I was young anyway. Ahhh for the good old days. *sighs*

It's been a weird day

zeuser comments on Jul 12, 2022:

Uh oh, they're gonna send you the bill.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 12, 2022:

That quacked me up a bit....

I think my priorities are messed up.

zeuser comments on Jul 12, 2022:

This cuts a bit too close to the bone.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 12, 2022:

You misspelled "boner"...

It was bound to be an issue sooner or later.....

zeuser comments on Jul 12, 2022:

That is beyond sad.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 12, 2022:

Pretty much....

I don't have a clue.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 11, 2022:

Salesman for Apple: This is the latest and greatest phone we make and in about a year you will need to replace it because the updates will make it run like shit. Me: What is the difference between it and the last phone you made? Salesman: The case is different and it costs 300.00 more than ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 11, 2022:

@Beowulfsfriend I use mine for texts, calls and a camera.... No financial data or any high risk uses there are just too many ways that things can bite you on the ass.

I don't know if I can afford the liquor bill, but I'm game

phxbillcee comments on Jul 7, 2022:

Hell, used to happen a lot more often here, even. Had some 'knock-down-drag-outs' with a few folks over in "Memes R Us" once upon a time... I bet you remember some of those, Glenn...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 10, 2022:

@glennlab, @phxbillcee Yeah I still have at least a dozen of those jackasses blocking me.... I love how even citing facts and figures they still scream and yell about how the propaganda they have been fed by the Clinton wing is "real".... In some ways the Reaganites are even dumber that the GQP....

This man was unhappy with his appearance So he decided to get a facelift.

St-Sinner comments on Jul 7, 2022:

LOL.. awesome. I want to find that lady, I want a second opinion on something

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 7, 2022:

She is going to be disappointed when she pulls the short straw.....

Knock it off you guys, it's hurricane season right now ya know.

Sierra4 comments on Jul 6, 2022:

C’mon J. We have to get some credit for ending abortions.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 7, 2022:

@joeandbarb I always find that amusing...

I'm sleeping with the minister's wife.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 6, 2022:

Sounds like somebody might be desperate enough to dig up a date....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 7, 2022:

@joeandbarb Why the fuck would anyone want to be "cured?"

I don't know if I can afford the liquor bill, but I'm game

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 7, 2022:

Even I wouldn't last an hour trying that challenge...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 7, 2022:

@glennlab Went in to kneel before the great porcelain god and spoke to his apostles Ralph and George about then I bet...

I'm sleeping with the minister's wife.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 6, 2022:

Sounds like somebody might be desperate enough to dig up a date....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@phxbillcee Yeah there is a lot of truth in that too....

Knock it off you guys, it's hurricane season right now ya know.

Sierra4 comments on Jul 6, 2022:

C’mon J. We have to get some credit for ending abortions.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

Probably it will cause a few category 6 ones to hit the Deep South.... One can always hope right?....

I'm sleeping with the minister's wife.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 6, 2022:

Sounds like somebody might be desperate enough to dig up a date....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@OldMetalHead Yeah I went there so sue me.... I have a sick and twisted sense of humor it kind of comes with the territory when you spent time in the service and ended up with PTSD....

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@ChestRockfield https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qileP4bAzek

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@ChestRockfield You are the stupid fuck voting against your own interests and prove it by using propaganda attacks as if it were reality when your corporate conservatives that you are making excuses for are the problem. Well part of the problem the rest is the low IQ voters who support them and the GQP then try to move the goal posts saying stupid shit like "I wasn't talking about what we did I am talking about the proved false claims of what you did..."

Real handy

glennlab comments on Jul 5, 2022:

He looks board.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

Damn you I had to think of a new one....

Hit the nail on the head...Pardon the pun!!!

lerlo comments on Jul 6, 2022:

And he's still standing in that photo...🤪 Not to mention alive.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

Probably not for very long...

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@ChestRockfield You really are a stupid mother fucker if you believe that shit propaganda put out by Hillary's PUMAs who all voted for McCain instead of "the Black guy"..... https://www.vox.com/mischiefs-of-faction/2016/7/28/12302406/bernie-or-busters-nothing-like-pumas https://news.gallup.com/poll/105691/mccain-vs-obama-28-clinton-backers-mccain.aspx

What a Mom

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 5, 2022:

Me: I had a collision while riding my bike and was thrown 20 feet knocking myself unconscious against the curb... Not only do I have a big gash in my head I seem to be bleeding from my ears.... Mother: That's nice is the curb ok?....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@MerlinZap All the stupid shit I did as a kid it is surprising I am still alive...

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 6, 2022:

@ChestRockfield More bad strategy won't tht just be wonderful helping the GQP make a bigger mess that if it isn't cleaned up soon we will end up living in a theocracy....

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 5, 2022:

@ChestRockfield You sound like a fan of the Clintons..... If you are so fucking smart how come you keep losing to morons like Donny Dumbass?.... Do us a favor and stop selling out to the far right and support your constituents instead of the billionaire donors for a change and win elections. https://youtu.be/bIpKfw17-yY

What a Mom

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 5, 2022:

Me: I had a collision while riding my bike and was thrown 20 feet knocking myself unconscious against the curb... Not only do I have a big gash in my head I seem to be bleeding from my ears.... Mother: That's nice is the curb ok?....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 5, 2022:

@St-Sinner Actually everything except the bleeding from the ears and scalp did happen but the curb was fine and I never did tell her.

I guess the old adage is true....

phxbillcee comments on Jul 5, 2022:

Or in a bucket...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 5, 2022:

@phxbillcee It's on my bucket list.....

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 5, 2022:

@ChestRockfield Ever heard the old expression "excuses are like assholes?... Everybody has one and they all stink." Well that is supposed to be one of the most blue leaning districts in the country....

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

@ChestRockfield My guess is you refuse to pay attention..... Either that or you are just plain stupid... https://www.forbes.com/sites/alisondurkee/2022/07/01/biden-may-soon-nominate-an-anti-abortion-federal-judge---to-appease-mitch-mcconnell/?sh=dd0f24930a84 https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/nancy-pelosi-henry-ceuller-support-1352290/ https://www.businessinsider.com/pelosi-clyburn-campaigning-for-anti-abortion-democrat-henry-cuellar-texas-2022-5 https://sports.yahoo.com/super-pac-supporting-anti-abortion-185031365.html?guccounter=1=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8=AQAAAMwflrEKXMOuHsQbMm1qNz1buSNdTWoLmk7RwIAjWOKIU3HAwwz3TAKUwRYURW6HoTT0ysmVzNPJOmDEzVWtA1ztfn6GTTlqc1qfAFPKj4q9OQ7W1L27ATSK6ZZAKGPvDMSOsq6VDskvrDdER-BCFnzY6uN_gYDSXZKsKO2hzPDH https://www.texastribune.org/2022/05/04/jim-clyburn-henry-cuellar-democrats-abortion-election/

Happy Monday!!!! Trying to make some of you laugh, this has been a sad day!

St-Sinner comments on Jul 4, 2022:

Lol... Grading please, how is the girth and creativity?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

Shorter than a tooth pick and narrower than a drinking straw.... I give it -6...

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

@ChestRockfield their pet flying monkey Joke Biden just made a deal with McConnell to appoint another conservative anti-abortion judge..... Clinton and Pelosi have both been endorsing anti-abortion candidates one of whom is under investigation g=by the DOJ for corruption. Clearly anyone who supports the Liberal Right-wing is no more an American than a member of the GQP.....

Happy fourth, or not.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

And neither of them worthy of it....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

@ChestRockfield Not ones like Clinton or Pelosi....

Talk about a communications failure.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 4, 2022:

Is that what they call a girl who can give magical head?....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

@MaryChristmas Looks more like she sucked the big head out through the little one...

Coz a lot of planning is required.

phxbillcee comments on Jul 4, 2022:

Need to know who is bringing the dip, the lube...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

You forgot the chips and whips....

I found this to be strange. You?

phxbillcee comments on Jul 4, 2022:

She's just practicing for when she hooks up with you, @St-Sinner...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 4, 2022:

She needs a shorter straw....

You know how old the art of tattoo is?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 2, 2022:

Later the same day the art of cussing was invented....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 3, 2022:

@Betty But still inspiration requires time to become art...

You know how old the art of tattoo is?

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 2, 2022:

Later the same day the art of cussing was invented....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 3, 2022:

@Betty It takes time to create any new art form though....

Mongoose in Texas are aggressive

Betty comments on Jul 3, 2022:

And without opposable thumbs. lol

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 3, 2022:

Didn't you know?..... Texas is filled with mutants this just happens to be one of the less dangerous ones...

Mongoose in Texas are aggressive

Garban comments on Jul 3, 2022:

He’s actually a very nice squirrel, helping his snake friend with his overbite.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 3, 2022:

Nah he is just using his Texas toothpick to help his friend get something out from between his teeth....

Mongoose in Texas are aggressive

glennlab comments on Jul 3, 2022:

Don't fuck with the squirrels in Texas.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 3, 2022:

Imagine a guy from India who can't tell the difference between a squirrel and a mongoose....

I sure as hell would never take a bullet for him....

dalefvictor comments on Jul 2, 2022:

What would have happened if the Secret Service allowed him to get to the Capital and he was shot and killed?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 2, 2022:

I would have given them medals....

He sings well

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 2, 2022:

And his new number one hit single "Squealing the night away..."

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 2, 2022:

@St-Sinner Hello it's me was Jim Coochy....

Just had an epiphany...

anglophone comments on Jul 1, 2022:

When somebody angers me, I am tempted to give him or her a good poke in the eye. The best way to get rid of temptation is to give into it. Think about that.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 2, 2022:

@Betty Thank you....

(Thanks to @Druvius .

anglophone comments on Jul 1, 2022:

I wish the whole of the Rethuglican Party was locked into a prison ship which was scuttled in the middle of the Atlantic.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

Why would anyone want to pollute the ocean by putting that much toxic trash in it?....

Just had an epiphany...

anglophone comments on Jul 1, 2022:

When somebody angers me, I am tempted to give him or her a good poke in the eye. The best way to get rid of temptation is to give into it. Think about that.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

@Betty After tossing that body into a 55 gallon steel drum with 100 pounds of thermite?... I kind of doubt it.

Mrs. Betty Bowers [youtube.com]

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jul 1, 2022:

Video was removed...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

@Dhiltong Maybe you made an error in the hyper text transfer protocol link....

Just had an epiphany...

anglophone comments on Jul 1, 2022:

When somebody angers me, I am tempted to give him or her a good poke in the eye. The best way to get rid of temptation is to give into it. Think about that.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

@Betty Far simpler to just hide the bodies....

For or against the vaccine ? P.S - I'm for it myself.

Corvislover comments on Dec 25, 2021:

Vaccinated against many germs. Waiting for the vaccine against stupid people

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

@Corvislover You just lived to tell about having COVID because you were vaccinated dumbass.... It is morons like you who are too stupid to understand science who are whacked... FYI since you are too stupid to understand English I can see that you are poorly educated so good luck surviving....

So much progress to reverse, so little time.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 30, 2022:

Thanks corporate Democrats for making promises you never intended to keep.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

@JackPedigo Maybe if they weren't so fucking busy sucking up to the same wealthy donors the Republicans have and followed through on the promises they keep making they would stop losing to the GQP and we wouldn't be having these problems.... Blaming the Raygun-crats like Pelosi and the Clintons makes a lot of sense what doesn't make any sense is that you refuse to see it.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIpKfw17-yY=youtu.be

For or against the vaccine ? P.S - I'm for it myself.

Corvislover comments on Dec 25, 2021:

Vaccinated against many germs. Waiting for the vaccine against stupid people

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jul 1, 2022:

It's called COVID....

Well so much for being a "Superpower.

zeuser comments on Jun 30, 2022:

Even before all of those assets were lost, who the fuck paid for them? I'd love to see how the government gets its money. I need to look into that, I need a hobby.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

@zeuser Well the main exports of the Ukraine as well as the Russian Federation are in both cases... 1) oil/natural gas 2) steel 3) wheat 4) weapons sales (Thanks to the Ukraine he doesn't have much to sell any more...) Right now Putin has lost 100% of his ability to export both wheat and steel... (the steel is going to trying to manufacture military equipment to replace his losses in the war but he can't get the parts that will make them run. (chips, wiring harnesses etc...) while the wheat is going to feed not just his army in the field but to feed the civilian population because he can't import food like before..) and the problems he is having with oil and natural gas I already explained....

Well so much for being a "Superpower.

zeuser comments on Jun 30, 2022:

Even before all of those assets were lost, who the fuck paid for them? I'd love to see how the government gets its money. I need to look into that, I need a hobby.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

Much of that money comes from his ex-buddies in the plutocracy who are leaving the country to avoid the next purge. Most of it comes from oil and that is getting to be a real problem for him because it is getting harder to sell and even discounting his prices isn't working.... Sorry for blowing that hobby for you....

Well so much for being a "Superpower.

St-Sinner comments on Jun 30, 2022:

What is sad is every government keeps it's people brainwashed with false pride to think theirs is the greatest country in the world. No matter how rotten the country is today, ask people inside it.... and they will not stop telling how magnificent it was, how glorious it's history was and how great ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

@St-Sinner As well as being factual and offending the entire far right wing of this country as well as the corporate Raygun-Crats.... An admirable feat I do my best to emulate on a daily basis and thankfully do manage to succeed at on a regular basis....

Well so much for being a "Superpower.

St-Sinner comments on Jun 30, 2022:

What is sad is every government keeps it's people brainwashed with false pride to think theirs is the greatest country in the world. No matter how rotten the country is today, ask people inside it.... and they will not stop telling how magnificent it was, how glorious it's history was and how great ...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

And thanks to the GQP we have the same disease in the US.... https://youtu.be/bIpKfw17-yY

Trump still has a lot of skeletons in the closet.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 30, 2022:

I hear his mom is still looking for an abortion...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

@St-Sinner Trump.....

Food for thought...

Garban comments on Jun 30, 2022:

And slept at the hotel.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

Otis had a jail cell he slept in that they never locked the door of....

I'm very late today! Hope you all had a good Wednesday!

phxbillcee comments on Jun 29, 2022:

Give 'em hell, Michelle!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 Like Twiggy way back then.... When she starred in the movie "Club Paradise" with Robin Williams I couldn't believe that was her she looked fantastic....

Now this works

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 29, 2022:

I have only been in this house for a little over 5 years now and not only have the Jehovah's Witlesses black listed me the Morons, Baptists and three other churches in the neighborhood....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 30, 2022:

@phxbillcee It does keep them from bothering me and even at the bus stops where some of these nutter tend to hang out these days looking for victims they seem to wander off without talking to me.

Congratulations ....

glennlab comments on Jun 29, 2022:

She's got 6 justices stuck up there.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@Diogenes Sounds something like what I told a scammer from India today.... He called with the "Discover card will lower your interest rate" scam today (Discover doesn't call people I know because I already have the card...). So I told him I fucked his mom in the ass and she shit him out..... I don't think he likes me much...

I'm always trying to be helpful.

phxbillcee comments on Jun 29, 2022:

I've always wondered about that song. It seems to be implying that if you date one you must date them all. I mean, I'm getting older, but if that's what's expected...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@phxbillcee https://youtu.be/_dGh7p1tZmk

Right play, wrong actors

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 29, 2022:

Lucky hubby.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@Garban If the wife joins in you have a reverse gangbang.....

Right play, wrong actors

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 29, 2022:

Lucky hubby.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@Garban Does Rosie bring her 5 sisters to the party?...

Right play, wrong actors

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 29, 2022:

Lucky hubby.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@Garban Counting the mistress?....

Congratulations ....

glennlab comments on Jun 29, 2022:

She's got 6 justices stuck up there.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

And a few million Republicans... Stupid ones too from this article. https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2022/6/29/2107129/-NC-Republican-Congressman-Greg-Murphy-Abortion-isn-t-needed-because-rape-doesn-t-exist?utm_campaign=recent

A PhD from the 'University of Experience'

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 28, 2022:

I wonder why he looks like an overused punching bag?.... Oh wait never mind....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 29, 2022:

@St-Sinner Well my bet is that him being stupid enough to wear shirts like that make him the cunt and keeps him out of the gene pool....

Unlike snap and crackle, pop can be fatal.

silverotter11 comments on Jun 28, 2022:

🤣🤣😈🤣🤣 I always buy a hatchback just for the bodies I need to get rid of.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 28, 2022:

Grinders work well too....

Tuesday Morning Memes! Have a good day!

St-Sinner comments on Jun 28, 2022:

Very good but what happened to Titty Tuesdays?

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 28, 2022:

.............

An oldie but worth another look.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 27, 2022:

And people wonder why there are so many divorces when kids learn shit like this from their parents....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 27, 2022:

@zeuser Outlaw religion?.... That would be a good start.

Wish I could

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 25, 2022:

Only dumb people pay that kind of money for tap water in a bottle....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 26, 2022:

@dalefvictor Just think of their frustration when they try to arrest you for any alcohol related driving offense..... Not to mention the hush money to keep it out of the news that the cops there are incompetent...

Wish I could

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 25, 2022:

Only dumb people pay that kind of money for tap water in a bottle....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

@dalefvictor You pay more per gallon for water than gasoline and these days that is saying a lot. I have some old Gatorade bottles that I wash out and refill so I don't make the fraudsters more wealthy.

Texas announces secession....

phxbillcee comments on Jun 25, 2022:

That's old news - LOL!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 Some places are safer than others is all and here in California we are fortunate that many of the crazies are moving to states like Texas and Alabama so they can hopefully die of COVID...

Texas announces secession....

phxbillcee comments on Jun 25, 2022:

That's old news - LOL!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

@MichelleGar1 Problem with Virginia is you might be moving from the frying pan into the fire. https://wset.com/news/local/virginia-abortion-legislation-governor-glenn-youngkin-seeking-bill-tighten-laws-abortions-scotus-roe-v-wade-june-24-2022

Texas announces secession....

phxbillcee comments on Jun 25, 2022:

That's old news - LOL!

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

Funny thing about Texas Republicans is they can't commit suicide by shooting themselves in the head.... Well that seems to go for all Republicans these days.

A good cheap alternative but not really Kosher, quite a dilemma for some I imagine! :-D

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 23, 2022:

Spam, it's like ham only cheaper and nasty tasting....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

@HankSherman I accept the compliment gladly because with Spam it is difficult to find any way to degrade their mystery meat product....

Well that crosses off one country for my next vacation....

joeandbarb comments on Jun 25, 2022:

Sign soon to be in Texas. now that they have abortion crossed off the list they will be going after any non missionary sexual position( and that will include anything for gays as well)

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

Meanwhile the GQP is buttfucking everyone who lives there....

Mrs.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 25, 2022:

I would love to play this during a congressional session....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 25, 2022:

@phxbillcee Not unlike all the comments from Christians on you tube....

Up coming reality show!!!

dalefvictor comments on Jun 24, 2022:

No, never, it would break my TV. if they were all on there at once. Besides daddy has a date with bars.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 24, 2022:

@Ray13 Print this out and mail it to him anonymously....

It will make some laugh while some people sad.

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 23, 2022:

Too skinny for my ex-wife after we got married she gained at least 70 pounds....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 24, 2022:

@joeandbarb By the time the divorce was finalized I lost almost 280 pounds of ugly fat...

This made me think of @azzow2

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 23, 2022:

Death by a thousand peckers.... What a fowl way to go.

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 24, 2022:

@glennlab I have always been a big fan of Spider Robinson....

I love haiku!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 23, 2022:

#1 was always me.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 24, 2022:

@zeuser My problem was I was always way over-qualified for the jobs I had and with un-diagnosed PTSD .... well lets just say relating to people can at times be difficult.

I love haiku!

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 23, 2022:

#1 was always me.....

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 23, 2022:

@zeuser If a boss gave me crap I just packed up and found a new one.... One time a company hired someone off the street for a job they promised me so I punched out and told the manager to fuck himself... When I came back to pick up the final check they owed me I had just cashed the first check from my new job and pulled out the money to slip the check into the roll of bills and his smug look turned to one of shock. When I told him I had just gotten paid for the first week he choked out that I was carrying more than he made in a month. I just told him it was because he was being over paid and walked out.

Not sure if that's the right answer

Lizard_of_Ahaz comments on Jun 22, 2022:

Actually this mentality is common these days.... They just hit the on button and can't figure out why it doesn't work.... usually they either haven't plugged it in or have it hooked up to a router they moved across the room and didn't connect back to the Internet...

Lizard_of_Ahaz replies on Jun 22, 2022:

@St-Sinner "They often complain about the mouse does weird shit, Windows behave strange, the browser is acting weird or the computer just does not work." Tell them very loudly to stop watching porn on the company computer..... I bet they never come back to ask you for help....